btsh.org

On Y Va!

Color: Light Blue
Year Founded: 2010
2010 Regular Season Finish: 6-9-0-1 (3rd, Hackett Division; 16th overall)
2010 Playoff Result: Lost to Fresh Kills in round of 16
Conference: Schumacher
Division: MacNeil
2010 Leading Scorer: Kevin MacDonald, 5 goals
Team Song: Frère Jacques
Key Additions: Numerous Free Agents
Key Losses: “Double J” Jeff Jewett

When the Mighty Squirrels dissolved after the 2009 season, Patrick “Sven” Larsen was one of the few players who did not join the Butchers or retire from BTSH altogether.  Instead, he started up a new team primarily of free agents, and managed to fit in time to plan his wedding as well.  Larsen was blunt when describing the 2010 season, noting, “Poutine had a decent showing for a first year, expansion team and probably would have done much better if we had a stable situation in nets.”  It bears mentioning that Larsen earned a lot of praise around the league for his team’s homage to La Belle Provence, in both its name and Nordiques-inspired jersey.

Larsen is confident that Poutine Machine will show improvement in 2011.  He believes the team’s goaltending issues of 2010 have passed, noting, “With Tim Brown locked in as our starting netminder, we are going to take a run at Rich Glanzer’s record and see if we can’t take a franchise from founding to the championship in two years.”  That run, however, will have to be made without “Double J” Jeff Jewett, one of the cornerstones of the 2010 team.  According to Larsen, “[Jewett] is moving to Los Angeles and while we will miss him, the waitresses at the EVT will miss him even more. Not only did he regularly close down the place, but he was also a key witness in an NYPD investigation.”  Even with the loss of this Canadian, Larsen boasts, “We’re on a mission to have the highest percentage of Canadians of any team in the league. We may not be any good, but at least, we can all agree on the superiority of our national healthcare program.”

Entity They Resemble, According to Rich Glanzer: Patrick Swayze (manly version from Red Dawn). Many people have often spoke about Patrick “Sven” Larsen’s and Patrick “Sven” Swayze’s identical appearance, but it’s more than just their rugged good looks. They both are leaders of men and women, and they both led undersized and undermanned armies. Swayze held off the Cubans for a while, and Larsen beat the champion Elves in 2010. Even though he’s dead, edge Swayze.
Fast Fact: Patrick Larsen is extremely excited about playing with a guy named Brodie St. John.

ROSTER
Kara Asuncion
Karey Bakker
Marcus Bonnee
Tim Brown
Whitney Garrabant
Mike Haas
Ethan Hartman
Salman Haq
Chelsea Hicks
Hillary Keller
Dave Kucharsky
Patrick “Sven” Larsen (C)
Kevin MacDonald
Ashish Nagpal
Tracy Ng
Natalie Oshin
Dave Paglia
Adam Pinto
Mary Pratt
Jo-Ann Provencher
Caitlin Riley
Brodie St. John
Andrew Therriault
Vincent Tracy
Leah Vickers

Tags: 2011 Season, Poutine Machine, team previews

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 9th, 2011 at 9:26 pm and is filed under 2011 Team Previews. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.