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Julie Is The Jimmy Fallon Of BTSH Photos

GAME OF THE WEEK
Mega Touch (1-0) at Unicorns (1-0)
Location: Tompkins East, 3:00 PM
All-Time Series: Unicorns lead 9-4
Game Notes: Two teams with convincing wins last weekend face off in this Schumacher Conference battle.  Mega Touch looked sharp against the Gouging Anklebiters during the Hockey Night in Tompkins regional telecast, rolling to a 5-1 victory.  New addition Adriano “Muscles Marinara” Bratta scored 30 seconds into the game, and his team never looked back.  Bratta finished with three goals and two assists, as he and his linemates Harvey Jaswal and Julie Katz dominated play and were on for all of the team’s goals.  This “Matzo-Masala-Marinara” line has invigorated Mega Touch and given the team high hopes for the remainder of the season.  The Unicorns also impressed in their playoff rematch against the Tompkins Square Riots.  The offense tallied six goals, led by Joe’s hat trick, while goalie Craig “Ug” LaCombe and the Uni’s defense shut out the normally potent Riots attack.  LaCombe gives most of the credit to his defenders, noting that only a handful of good shots got through to him.  Will Mega’s Matzo-Masala-Marinara line be able to break through this wall or will LaCombe and the Unicorns defense stifle another opponent?
Keys To The Game:
1. This is Mega Touch’s first ever Game of the Week.  Although captain Julie Katz is extremely eager to participate in the featured matchup, captain Eric Devlin is less enthusiastic.  How will the team handle the pressure of the big stage?
2. Unicorns rookie Luke tallied a goal during his team’s big win last Sunday.  He is just one of many offseason acquisitions that the Unicorns will rely on throughout the season.
3. As intense talks over the direction of the goaltenders’ union continue to heat up, this game will feature two of the principals of these discussions.  Mega Touch’s Mike Tuckman has vehemently opposed the creation of the union calling it “stupid and pointless.”  LaCombe, on the other hand, inexplicably seems to think the union’s founders Peter Lang and $howT!m3 may have been on to something…which would be a first.
Eli’s Pick: Unicorns.  This game will likely mimic the above photo.
Derek’s Pick: Unicorns.  Mega Touch has clearly improved, but the Unicorns still have a little more talent right now.
Watchability: 3.5 Devlins.  Eric’s been clamoring to have the watchability scale named after him for a while now.

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