Posts Tagged ‘Fresh Kills’
Week 5 News and Notes
Tuesday, May 3rd, 2011Is Jesse Kalb The Next Elves Captain?
In order to right the ship after losses to What The Puck and Mega Touch, the Happy Little Elves made the drastic decision to appoint a guest captain for their Rubens Division matchup against the Denim Demons. After a grueling application process, regular captains “The Chairman” Ben Chadwick and Rich Glanzer based their choice on the outcome of a “skeetball” game. Thus, when Mathematics captain Derek Tagliarino ousted Chadwick, he was given the reins to the team.
Employing the guest captain’s brilliant new strategy dubbed the TEDI (Tagliarino’s Elves Defensive Initiative), the Elves held the Demons scoreless through all of regulation and overtime. Unfortunately, the TEDI does not include any methods for scoring goals, so the Elves were also held off the score sheet. However, the Elves were ultimately victorious, when Tagliarino made the bold decision to put under-utilized and often overlooked flaxen-haired defender Trevor Beauclair in the shootout. The always modest Beauclair converted the final shootout attempt of the day, clinching the win for the Elves and Tagliarino.
After the success of Sunday’s guest captain (who retires undefeated from the position), Chadwick and Glanzer have already announced that they will continue to invite others to lead the team. Some of the rumored candidates include Jonathan “The Barnacle” Levine, Mike Smith, Anita Khar, Sharif “The Chocolate Buzzsaw” Corinaldi, Julie Katz, Larry “Mad Dog” Zimmer, Jesse Kalb, Karsten Pichon, and $h0wT!m3.
Season Preview: Fresh Kills
Friday, March 18th, 2011Patrick Can Not Recall Being In This Photo
Color: Royal Blue
Year Founded: 2002
2010 Regular Season Finish: 10-4-0-2 (1st, Donohue Division; 3rd overall)
2010 Playoff Result: Lost to Happy Little Elves in quarterfinals
Conference: Schumacher
Division: Donohue
2010 Leading Scorer: Justin Ross, 12 goals
Team Song: Outkast – So Fresh and So Clean
Key Additions: Scott Lee (Mathematics), Matt Kazior, Nick Scott
Key Losses: None
Week 17 Box Scores
Sunday, September 19th, 2010Your Donohue Division Champions
Fresh Kills 5, Tompkins Square Riots 4
Fresh Kills: Kevin “The Planet” Foster 2 (2), Dave Sokolyansky (8), Nick Hobbs (5), Alice Bertoni (1)
Tompkins Square Riots: Joe Fiore 2 (5), Alexandre Frenette (12), Shane-0 DeBlasio (2)
Game Notes: Fresh Kills has clinched the Donohue Division and the #3 seed for the playoffs.
Sky Fighters 3, Dark Rainbows 2
Sky Fighters: Martin “Ocho Cinco” Cejka (7), Mark Bloom (5), Sam “The Prodigy” Lassner (2)
Dark Rainbows: Trevor “White Jesus” Tyrrell (5), Sean Reynolds (3)
Rehabs 5, What The Puck 3
Rehabs: “The All-American Canadian” Adam Skuse 2 (9), Brock Bosacker 2 (6), Rob Blandi (6)
What The Puck: Tom MacDonald 2 (8), Mike “The X-Factor” Woodsworth (6)
Game Notes: Bosacker’s game-winning goal broke a 3-3 tie with 11 minutes remaining in regulation.
Cobra Kai 4, Butchers 2
Cobra Kai: Mark Talercio 2 (9), J.J. Murphy (8), Porter Littlepage (2)
Butchers: Gary Cohen (7), Arnold Sanchez (2)
LBS, Inc. 6, Gut Rot 5
LBS, Inc.: Karsten Pichon 2 (16), “The Alpha Male” Ken Poulin (15), Sam Anthony (3), Karen Erickson (2), Sascha Lehman (1)
Gut Rot: Scott 2 (9), Jefferson (3), Tom (3), Veronica (2)
Game Notes: Lehman’s game-winning goal broke a 5-5 tie with three minutes remaining in regulation, completing LBS, Inc.’s comeback from a 5-2 second-half deficit.
La Famiglia 1, Mathematics 0
La Famiglia: Denis Miciletto (8)
Shutout: Kevin Au (2)
Happy Little Elves 2, Denim Demons 1
Happy Little Elves: Gil Valdes (13), “The Chairman” Ben Chadwick (9)
Denim Demons: Noah Farkas (2)
Game Notes: Valdes’ game-winning goal broke a 1-1 tie with 16 minutes remaining in regulation.
Unicorns 5, Gouging Anklebiters 1
Unicorns: Chris 2 (6), Joe (8), Courtney (4), Ryan (3)
Gouging Anklebiters: Alex Derhohannesian (11)
Corlears Hookers 7, Mega Touch 0
Corlears Hookers: Jason Eitel 3 (7), Dan Thompson 2 (5), Josh “Doc” Sadlier-Brown (3), Albert “Al” Huang (1)
Shutout: Dustin “Fake Dutch’s Brother” Olson (2)
Filthy Gorgeous 10, Poutine Machine 0
Filthy Gorgeous: Sunny Mehra 3 (13), Matt Workman 2 (2), “Gentleman” James Pereira (11), Joe “Monster Mash” Essock (8), Joe Pereira (3), Rebecca Antar Novick (1), Jon Rick (1)
Shutout: Dan “D.O.” Owens (1)
La Famiglia 2, Gouging Anklebiters 1
La Famiglia: Denis Miciletto (9), Shafiq “Off-Black” Perry (6)
Gouging Anklebiters: Charles DeFranco (4)
Game Notes: Perry’s game-winning goal broke a 1-1 tie with seven minutes remaining in regulation.
Week 17 Preview
Thursday, September 16th, 2010Dave Hopes To Lead Fresh Kills To New Heights
GAME OF THE WEEK
Fresh Kills (8-4-0-2) at Tompkins Square Riots (7-6-1)
Location: Tompkins East, 1:00 PM
All-Time Series: First Meeting
Game Notes: Division leaders collide this Sunday as former teammates clash for the first time. Fresh Kills currently holds a four point lead in the Donohue Division, despite losing three of its past four games. The Tompkins Square Riots sit just one point ahead of the Mathematics in the MacNeil Division and snapped a three-game losing streak in their last contest with a convincing 7-2 win against Cobra Kai. However, this game’s allure extends way beyond the standings. Several members of the Riots once proudly wore the Fresh Kills colors, but defected to form their own team this past offseason. Although tensions were initially a little high following this schism, relations between these two teams are much more cordial now. For example, Bob “Olmec” Weyersberg of the Riots recently gave Fresh Kills rookie Justin Ross a free lesson on shooting techniques. In return, Fresh Kills’ Nick Hobbs helped Scott Townsend of the Riots glue a new blade into his hockey stick. Former Fresh Kills captain Kevin “The Planet” Foster summarizes, “There is no animosity. We’re all just sensitive people.”
Keys To The Game:
1. With two games to play, Fresh Kills needs to earn just one more point in the standings to clinch the Donohue Division and #3 seed in the playoffs. Or, the team can also back into the division title if Cobra Kai loses either of its last two games.
2. Alexandre Frenette leads the Riots, and also the entire Schumacher Conference, with 11 goals. His scoring has come in bunches, as he has recorded three multi-goal games, including two hat tricks.
3. No one is quite sure when it happened, but something has been wrong with Justin Ross’ shooting technique lately.
Eli’s Pick: Fresh Kills. If they clinch the division here, they avoid a potential winner-take-all game with Cobra Kai next Sunday.
Derek’s Pick: Fresh Kills. They’re supposedly the more competitive ones…
Watchability:4 DeBlasios. Former Fresh Kills captain “Hollywood” Jeff Lesser has no idea whom to root for, as he has friends on both teams. However, this may be a moot point, as he will probably be hanging out with A-listers while these teams play anyway.
Week 11 Box Scores
Sunday, July 18th, 2010What Do You Mean Nick Can’t Take Off His Shirt? He’s Hot!
Fresh Kills 4, Dark Rainbows 2
Fresh Kills: Dave Sokolyansky 2 (6), Mike Sokolyansky (5), Brice Rosenbloom (3)
Dark Rainbows: Sean Reynolds (2), John Cassidy (1)
Happy Little Elves 3, Unicorns 2
Happy Little Elves: Trevor Beauclair (11), Rob “Smash” Muggeo (4), Ryan Nakahara (4)
Unicorns: Iannis (3), John (2)
Game Notes: Muggeo’s game-winning goal broke a 2-2 tie with 1:17 remaining in regulation. This game had no bearing on the possession of the Fairy Tale Cup, which still belongs to the Dark Rainbows.
Tompkins Square Riots 7, Rehabs 5
Tompkins Square Riots: Patrick Blohmé 2 (8), Grant Mason 2 (6), Alexandre Frenette (5), Joe Fiore (3), Bob “Olmec” Weyersberg (2)
Rehabs: Adam “The All-American Canadian” Skuse 2 (6), Rob Blandi 2 (3), Alex Doucette (9)
Gut Rot 3, Sky Fighters 2 (OT)
Gut Rot: Tommy (5), Len (2), Dave (1)
Sky Fighters: Greg Infanti (6), Greg Cohan (5)
Game Notes: Tommy scored the tying goal with one minute remaining in regulation. Dave scored the game-winning goal in overtime.
Mathematics 6, Poutine Machine 2
Mathematics: Bradley Schmidt 2 (6), Sean “$howJu” McClain (4), Adam Langer (2), Andy Pratt (1), Mike Smith (1)
Poutine Machine: Kevin MacDonald (2), Dave Kucharsky (1)
Cobra Kai 2, La Famiglia 1
Cobra Kai: Mark Talercio (6), Bryan Niddrie (3)
La Famiglia: Shafiq “Off-Black” Perry (4)
Butchers 7, Mega Touch 0
Butchers: Jeff “Hawk” Hawkins 3 (4), Ben Bloom 2 (7), Gary Cohen (5), “The Charismatic Enigma” Arthur Revechkis (1)
Shutout: Eric Ramirez (1)
Corlears Hookers 5, LBS, Inc. 3
Corlears Hookers: Gavin “Dutch’s Brother” Kearney 3 (11), Peter “Purple Rain” Putka (3), Dan Thompson (3)
LBS, Inc.: J.P. Chaput 2 (2), Mike Taylor (1)
Filthy Gorgeous 9, Gouging Anklebiters 1
Filthy Gorgeous: Sunny Mehra 2 (10), Suvin “The Guru” Malik 2 (7), Caroline Currie 2 (3), Matt Novick 2 (3), “Gentleman” James Pereira (9)
Gouging Anklebiters: Alex Derhohannesian (8)
La Famiglia 1, Gouging Anklebiters 0
La Famiglia: Shafiq “Off-Black” Perry (5)
Shutout: Kevin Au (1)
Game Notes: Perry scored the only goal of the game with eight minutes remaining in regulation.
Denim Demons 10, What The Puck 0 (FORFEIT)
