Posts Tagged ‘playoff preview’
Playoff Preview: Opening Round (Part III)
Thursday, October 8th, 2009Filthy Plans To Be A Thorn In The Anklebiters’ Side
#5 Filthy Gorgeous (15-5-1) vs. #12 Gouging Anklebiters (8-11-2)
Location: Tompkins West, 2:30 PM
All-Time Series: Filthy Gorgeous leads 5-2
2009 Result: Week 11 – Filthy Gorgeous 5, Gouging Anklebiters 3
Game Notes: Although Filthy Gorgeous enters this game with the league’s second ranked offense, Gouging Anklebiter forward and notorious trash talker, Charles DeFranco, is not scared. He had the following to say about his opponents:
Chris can’t bake, Ali smells, Joe E. stinks, Fran has no business on a hockey court, Jean is French-Canadian, Dana dates a foot, Homin needs to shave, Suvin cheats, Ashley is ashy, Sunny is kind of a downer, Lindsay is unrecognizable, Becky caters to the fans too much, Matt N. does not cater to the fans enough, Dan has no goals this season, James is ungentlemanly, Joe P. leaves much to be desired, Jon lives in North Carolina, Monica uses too much profanity, Liza smiles too much, and Matt W. looks down on others…but Paul is okay in my book.
When reached for comment, a seething Monica Russo snapped, “Fuck him! We’re going to light up that motherfucking scoreboard!” [citation needed]
Eli’s Pick: Filthy Gorgeous. Them’s fightin’ words.
Derek’s Pick: Filthy Gorgeous. I make this pick reluctantly as Anklebiter Zack “Cryme Tyme” Weiner is now on a goal-scoring streak.
Watchability: 3.5 League Degenerates
No, That Is Not Dee Brown On Fresh Kills
#6 Dark Rainbows (14-6-0-1) vs. #11 Fresh Kills (9-10-1-1)
Location: Tompkins East, 3:30 PM
All-Time Series: Dark Rainbows lead 6-2
2009 Result: Week 8 – Fresh Kills 5, Dark Rainbows 4 (OT)
Game Notes: Former champions collide in this first round matchup, as the 2007 champion Dark Rainbows face the defending champion Fresh Kills. The Rainbows are red hot right now, having scored 21 goals in their last two games. Veteran forward and noted singer P.T. Walkley has come alive with hat tricks in each of these two games. His linemate, John Nielsen, leads the team with 20 goals on the season, including three against Fresh Kills in week 9. Although Fresh Kills enters the playoffs as just the 11 seed, the team has thrived on being the underdog in the past. Last season, as the 10 seed, Fresh Kills rattled off four straight upsets en route to the championship. Despite the team’s mediocre stats during the regular season, ranking just 11th in offense and 7th in defense, Fresh Kills proved it can still win in big games. The team has claimed wins from LBS, Inc., the Corlears Hookers, and this weekend’s opponent, the Dark Rainbows.
Eli’s Pick: Fresh Kills. Until someone sends them packing, they are still the defending champs.
Derek’s Pick: Dark Rainbows. They are too hot to lose in the opening round.
Watchability: 4.5 Townsends. This could be the best game of the weekend.
Playoff Preview: Opening Round (Part II)
Wednesday, October 7th, 2009First Place Tastes Sweet
#1 Denim Demons (14-2-2-3) vs. Mega Touch/Mathematics/Mexican Standoff
Location: Tompkins East, 1:00 PM
All-Time Series: Denim Demons lead Mega Touch 9-3, Denim Demons lead Mathematics 3-2, Denim Demons lead Mexican Standoff 7-0-1
2009 Result: Week 16 – Denim Demons 5, Mega Touch 0; Week 9 – Denim Demons 7, Mathematics 0; Week 4 – Denim Demons 4, Mexican Standoff 3
Game Notes: In addition to finishing first overall in the league standings, the Denim Demons also boast the league’s stingiest defense. The team allowed just 37 goals in 21 games and also led the league with six shutouts (five by Aaron “Coach” Pagdon). Although the Demons’ offense only ranked seventh in BTSH, the team still had an uncanny knack for late game heroics. Perhaps the Demons’ defining moment came in week 14 against their bitter rival the Rehabs, when (aided by Rubens Rock) they scored twice in the final two minutes to force overtime and eventually win in a shootout.
Watchability: 2 Dandeneaux. The regular season champ has never lost in the opening round.
Oh My God! Ant’s Ripped!
#2 What The Puck (16-5) vs. Mighty Squirrels/Mega Touch/Mathematics
Location: Tompkins West, 1:00 PM
All-Time Series: What The Puck leads Mighty Squirrels 5-0, What The Puck leads Mega Touch 11-2, What The Puck leads Mathematics 5-1
2009 Result: Week 6 – What The Puck 7, Mighty Squirrels 0; Week 15 – What The Puck 10, Mega Touch 2; Week 1 – What The Puck 10, Mathematics 0 and Week 22 – What The Puck 5, Mathematics 1
Game Notes: Not surprisingly, What The Puck features the league’s top offense with 102 goals on the season. Thanks, in part, to slew of offseason moves, the team finished with seven double-digit goal scorers, three more than the next highest team. While top acquisition Adriano “Muscles Marinara” Bratta led the team with 20 goals, team stalwarts Darrell “Accurate Bob” Hartman and Tom MacDonald had the next highest totals with 16 and 14, respectively. What The Puck’s one weakness, if any, has been its struggles with attendance throughout the season. If Captain Larry can motivate the troops to show up early and often, the Orange Juggernaut will be dangerous throughout the playoffs.
Watchability: 2 Farleys. None of the potential matchups looks close on paper.
Playoff Preview: Opening Round (Part I)
Tuesday, October 6th, 2009Will Either Of These Teams Actually Make An 11 AM Start?
#15 Mighty Squirrels (6-13-1) vs. #18 Mexican Standoff (4-15-1-1)
Location: Tompkins East, 11:00 AM
All-Time Series: Mighty Squirrels lead 4-3-1
2009 Result: Week 2 – Mighty Squirrels 3, Mexican Standoff 0; Week 18 – Mighty Squirrels 6, Mexican Standoff 3
Game Notes: After another tumultuous season, Mexican Standoff finds itself in the play-in game for the third straight time. Although the team’s record is marginally better than it was last year, Standoff will enter the weekend as the lowest seeded team in the playoffs. Offensive leaders Ben and Gary have paved the way for the team this season, accounting for 29 of the team’s 47 goals. However, despite their scoring prowess, Ben and Gary were only able to tally one goal against the Mighty Squirrels in their two games this season. As a result, the Squirrels won convincingly in both contests, including a shutout victory by rookie goaltender Eric Ramirez in week 2. Their offense is led by Arthur “Lil Weezy” Revechkis, who finished the regular season with 13 goals.
Eli’s Pick: Mighty Squirrels. The Cheek-Scrappy line is due for a big game.
Derek’s Pick: Mighty Squirrels. They seem to have Standoff’s number this season.
Watchability: 3 Bens. The 18th seed has won this play-in game in both years of the current playoff format.
That’s Gray!
#16 Mega Touch (5-15-1) vs. #17 Mathematics (3-13-1-3)
Location: Tompkins West, 11:00 AM
All-Time Series: Mathematics lead 4-2-1
2009 Result: Week 3 – Mathematics 2, Mega Touch 2 (OT-SO); Week 20 – Mega Touch 5, Mathematics 3
Game Notes: Mega Touch’s offseason re-branding may have actually paid off. After notching only one win in 2008, the team has recorded five victories this season. However, the team’s offense still ranks dead last in goals scored with 33, and the Touch will once again have to wake up early for the play-in game. The Mathematics, on the other hand, rank dead last in goals allowed. As a result, they have gone winless in their last 10 games. Despite these trends, the Mathematics’ offense has been respectable, producing two double-digit goal scorers in Andy Pratt and Bradley Schmidt. They and the rest of the Mathematics will look to exploit Mega Touch’s 17th ranked defense.
Watchability: 2.5 Lus. There will probably be a lot of goals scored between these two Woodsworth Division foes.
Playoff Preview: Championship Game
Thursday, October 23rd, 2008The Corlears Hookers Have Two Words For Fresh Kills
#3 Corlears Hookers (16-4) vs. #10 Fresh Kills (11-8-0-1)
Location: Corlears North, 4:00 PM
All-Time Series: Corlears Hookers lead 2-0
2008 Result: Week 6 – Corlears Hookers 4, Fresh Kills 0
Game Notes: For the second consecutive season, the Corlears Hookers have advanced to the championship game. Unlike last year, when the Hookers battled through the playoffs with three one-goal victories en route to the final, they have cruised in 2008. In just three playoff games, they have posted twenty goals, including five apiece for Reilly “Fake Dutch” Olson and Gavin “Dutch’s Brother” Kearney. With only three goals allowed, their defense and goaltending have been extremely impressive as well. As would be expected of a Cinderella team, Fresh Kills has faced a tougher road. Although they clinched a spot in the final with a 3-1 victory over LBS, Inc. last week, their previous two wins came by only one goal, including a double overtime thriller against What The Puck. Their offense has revolved around the Sokolyansky brothers, who have accounted for 50% of their postseason scoring. Fresh Kills, now in their seventh year, have had varying degrees of success in the regular season, but have perennially made a deep run in the playoffs. In their brief stint in BTSH, the Corlears Hookers have been a dominant force, with an overall record of 35-6 and two championship game appearances. Both teams, however, are still searching for their first title. On Sunday, one of them will finally capture BTSH glory.
Keys To The Game For The Corlears Hookers:
1. After shaking off some rust in the first half, goalie Chris Beauvois held Filthy Gorgeous scoreless in the second half of their semifinal matchup. When he is in a rhythm, even the most dangerous of shooters struggle to find the net against him.
2. Although Olson and Kearney have led the team in postseason scoring, Jason Eitel tied for fourth in the league with fifteen regular season goals, despite missing several games with an injury. He will be another dangerous weapon in the Hookers’ already loaded arsenal.
3. It may not be a coincidence that the Hookers have heated up with Brendan “Dutch” Kearney out with an injury. Perhaps with him on the sidelines, the jealousy and backstabbing has finally cooled down.
Keys To The Game For Fresh Kills:
1. Feed off the energy of the fans. BTSH loves an underdog, and the heckle wall will be heavily tilted against the favored Corlears Hookers.
2. With a goals against average of just over one goal per game in the playoffs, goalie Dave Gil de Rubio has quietly had an impressive postseason. He will have to be at the top of his game while facing the Hookers’ snipers.
3. Don’t let Bob “Olmec” Weyersberg shoot…or pass.
Eli’s Pick: Corlears Hookers. Getting shutout in last year’s final should be enough to motivate them for this game.
Derek’s Pick: Corlears Hookers. When the Hookers are at full attendance, Fresh Kills cannot match them player for player.
Craig “Ug” LaCombe’s Pick: Corlears Hookers. Fresh Kills are the Buffalo Bills of BTSH. They will never win it. “Lessy” is a poor man’s Jim Kelly.
Playoff Preview: Semifinals (Part II)
Thursday, October 16th, 2008Yeah, Fernando, We’re Going To Need You To Come In On Sunday…
#2 LBS, Inc. (15-3-1) vs. #10 Fresh Kills (10-8-0-1)
Location: Corlears South, 4:00 PM
All-Time Series: Fresh Kills leads 9-5
2008 Result: Week 15 – LBS, Inc. 6, Fresh Kills 3
Game Notes: As the #2 seed, LBS, Inc. was supposed to be in this game. They have looked nearly impenetrable throughout the regular season, and their momentum continued into the playoffs. In the opening round, they blanked Mexican Standoff 4-0, despite the absence of star player (and self-proclaimed “cleanest player in the game”) “The Alpha Male” Ken Poulin. They also weathered a spirited challenge from the Unicorns in the quarterfinals, ultimately prevailing in a shootout. As the #10 seed, Fresh Kills is the clear Cinderella story of the playoffs for the second consecutive year. After a mediocre regular season, Fresh Kills turned on the light switch for the postseason. In the opening round, they survived a 1-0 battle against the dangerous Martin “Ocho Cinco” Cejka-led Sky Fighters with gritty play and tenacity. They continued by stunning regular season champion What The Puck the following Sunday. Both LBS, Inc. and Fresh Kills have been cornerstones of the league for several seasons, resulting in a storied and competitive rivalry. Although LBS, Inc. defeated Fresh Kills in their 2008 regular season matchup, Fresh Kills is responsible for eliminating The Corporation from the playoffs in 2007.
Keys To The Game For LBS, Inc.:
1. “Hollywood” Jeff Lesser may be a star in some circles, but “The Alpha Male” Ken Poulin isn’t buying it. He warned, “We’re going to hand Jeff Lessy [sic] his ass implants back to him after the game.” Whether Poulin’s comments actually serve to motivate his team remains to be seen.
2. Karsten Pichon finished second in the regular season with 20 goals and has also added two more in the playoffs. When he is on, LBS, Inc. is tough to beat.
3. Captain Sascha Puritz is always quick to note that Seth Wachtell has been one of BTSH’s top goalies over the past few seasons, despite a limited amount of press. He is the only goalie remaining in the playoffs who has led his team to a championship.
Keys To The Game For Fresh Kills:
1. Alicia Walker returned to the team last week after a brief (and unexcused) hiatus to get married. While she does not score a lot of goals, she has already fit back into her familiar role as one of Fresh Kills’ top playmakers.
2. Dave Sokolyansky will serve as Fresh Kills’ offensive counter-punch to the scoring prowess of Karsten Pichon. Last week, Sokolyansky tallied a hat trick, including the game-winner in double overtime.
3. Don’t let Bob “Olmec” Weyersberg shoot.
Eli’s Pick: LBS, Inc. Every time The Alpha Male has run his mouth, they have followed it up with a win.
Derek’s Pick: LBS, Inc. Fresh Kills’ playoff run makes for a very nice story, but I don’t think it’s in the cards for them to advance another round.
