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Can These Two Stay Undefeated?

GAME OF THE WEEK
Mighty Squirrels (6-0-3) vs. Filthy Gorgeous (7-2-1)
Location: Moffo, 5:00 PM
All-Time Series: Filthy Gorgeous leads 2-1
Game Notes: Both of these teams enter the weekend tied for first place in BTSH, alongside LBS, Inc. and What The Puck.  Although Filthy Gorgeous boasts the second highest goal total in the league with forty, they have relied on several different players to account for their scoring.  Joseph Pereira currently leads the team with just six goals, while Matt Novick, James Pereira, and Paul “Ashy Larry” Vernon have each contributed five.  The Mighty Squirrels’ offense, on the other hand, ranks in the middle of the pack, but their defense is tied for second in goals allowed.  Although captain Rachel “A-Korn” Greene’s “back to fundamentals” approach to hockey is a large factor in their new found defensive prowess, much of the credit can go to new goaltender Tommy Mayoros, who has allowed only nine goals in eight games.  The winners of this game could find themselves in the unexpected position of first place as the break rapidly approaches.
Keys To The Game:
1. Arthur “Lil Weezy” Revechkis now has six of the Mighty Squirrels’ twenty-four goals.  With Revechkis accounting for twenty-five percent of the offense, keeping him in check should be a priority for Filthy.
2. While Filthy Gorgeous goalie Dan Owens’s goals against average is not as sterling as Mayoros’s, he has been just as effective.  He is coming off of his first shutout of the season and has not lost a game since week two.
3. Mighty Squirrels superstar defenseman Gary Kowalski has a hearing scheduled with the city of New York on Sunday at 4 PM to discuss seventy-six unpaid parking tickets.  Although the meeting is downtown, it is unclear if he will be able to make the game.
Eli’s Pick: Filthy Gorgeous.  Monica 1, Sven 0.
Derek’s Pick: Filthy Gorgeous.  Offense beats defense, and the Squirrels suffer their first loss of the season.

Happy Little Elves (1-8-1) vs. Bad Touch (0-9-1)
Location: Corlears North, 3:00 PM
All-Time Series: First Meeting
Game Notes: Both of these teams enter this game on six game losing streaks.
Eli’s Pick: Bad Touch
Derek’s Pick: Happy Little Elves

Denim Demons (6-0-1-1) vs. Dark Rainbows (7-3)
Location: Corlears South, 3:00 PM
All-Time Series: Dark Rainbows lead 7-1
Game Notes: Dark Rainbows goalie Trevor “White Jesus” Tyrrell has been upgraded to questionable for this important game of top teams.  In somewhat Bill Belichick-like fashion, Demons captain Adam “Legend Killer” Rubens has downgraded his entire team to probable.  They don’t call him the “Cerebral Assassin” for nothing.
Eli’s Pick: Dark Rainbows.  Captain Sean Reynolds is too crafty to fall for Rubens’s mind games.
Derek’s Pick: Denim Demons.  Trevor probably has one more week of recovery before he can play, and the Rainbows are a different team without him.

Rehabs (6-1-1-1) vs. LBS, Inc. (7-2-1)
Location: Moffo, 3:00 PM
All-Time Series: LBS, Inc. leads 6-4
Game Notes: This matchup was a close runner-up for the Game of the Week, as the Rehabs sit just a point out of first, and LBS, Inc. is in a four-way tie for first.  This battle will also serve as a reunion of sorts for the dissolved Pork Fried Rice, as former members “Con” Ed Lau (Rehabs), Mike “Cupcake” Bartlett (Rehabs), and Brian “Grandmaster B” Barrett (LBS, Inc.) will all play. 
Eli’s Pick: Rehabs.  Captain Bryan “Stork” Welch claims former PFR members Mike Sayre and J.P. Chaput will start coming to games soon as well.
Derek’s Pick: Rehabs.  Welch also claims he may have worked out a deal with former PFR member, Pat Verbeek.

Tuques (3-6) vs. Fresh Kills (4-5-0-1)
Location: Corlears North, 4:00 PM
All-Time Series: Fresh Kills leads 9-1
Game Notes: Although the series history of this matchup is severely lopsided, the Tuques claimed their first victory over Fresh Kills last season in a shootout.
Eli’s Pick: Fresh Kills.  By the way, Kevin “The Planet” Foster is very happy with his new nickname.
Derek’s Pick: Fresh Kills

Mexican Standoff (1-6-2-1) vs. Unicorns (5-5)
Location: Corlears South, 4:00 PM
All-Time Series: Unicorns lead 8-0
Game Notes: Ellery “The Nature Boy” Gillette has now scored two goals in his last three games.  Although Ellery has claimed to lead the league in scoring every year, this is the first time anyone has actually seen him put the ball in the net.  This may turn out to be one of the top offseason acquisitions…at least, until the Redskins begin their season.
Eli’s Pick: Unicorns.  Craig “Ug” LaCombe is not going to let Ellery put one past him.
Derek’s Pick: Unicorns

Cobra Kai (3-6-1) vs. Corlears Hookers (7-1)
Location: Moffo, 4:00 PM
All-Time Series: Corlears Hookers lead 1-0
Game Notes: As the Corlears Hookers prepare for games against the Mighty Squirrels and Denim Demons in the two weeks preceding the break, they cannot overlook a feisty Cobra Kai team.  Although the Dojo enters this game on a three-game losing streak, Ski’s squad does hold a victory over the Sky Fighters and a tie against the Denim Demons.
Eli’s Pick: Corlears Hookers
Derek’s Pick: Corlears Hookers

Gouging Anklebiters (2-8) vs. What The Puck (7-2-0-1)
Location: Corlears North, 5:00 PM
All-Time Series: What The Puck leads 5-4
Game Notes: Captains Phil “Sandy” Donohue and Larry “Mad Dog” Zimmer are both easily recognizable by their curly locks.  However, the two have agreed for the this game’s winning captain to shave the losing captain’s head.
Eli’s Pick: What The Puck
Derek’s Pick: What The Puck

Sky Fighters (5-4) vs. Mathematics (3-7)
Location: Moffo, 6:00 PM
All-Time Series: Sky Fighters lead 1-0
Game Notes: The prime time Moffo game will have more than just pride at stake.  The Sky Fighters and Mathematics have bet each other that the losing team will have to cheerlead for one of the winning team’s upcoming games.  In addition, captains Amy Lott and Derek Tagliarino have agreed to allow the winning captain to write a nickname on the back of the losing captain’s game jersey.

Media Records:
Eli: 53-24
Derek: 51-26

Tags: 2008 season, ashy larry, more Squirrels than necessary, stupid bets, Weekly Previews

This entry was posted on Wednesday, July 9th, 2008 at 10:42 pm and is filed under Weekly Previews. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.