{"id":10935,"date":"2015-07-26T00:51:46","date_gmt":"2015-07-26T04:51:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/?p=10935"},"modified":"2015-07-26T12:55:21","modified_gmt":"2015-07-26T16:55:21","slug":"week-11-previews-inside-the-writers-room","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/week-11-previews-inside-the-writers-room\/","title":{"rendered":"Week 11 Previews: Inside the Writers\u2019 Room"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Were you ever wondering how BTSH media decided to write on a certain topic? Were you subsequently wondering why you or your team may have not been getting much BTSH media love this year?! Well, this is a story of great proportions with roots to the same underlying problems of so much of the troubles on Wall Street\u2014who takes the blame\u2014no, not people\u2014but algorithms!<\/p>\n<p>It started off many years ago, prior to many of us even starting our BTSH careers. Prior to Tim being commissioner, prior to Adriano and Bob W, even. It started off so long ago, we don\u2019t even know who made the purchase. But, whoever did spend a good chunk of money trying to make writing previews the most efficient as possible\u2014relying solely on an acquisition of legacy IBM technology\u2014spent far too much for the algorithmic BTSH Brainstormer 3000.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-3000.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-3000.jpg\" alt=\"BTSH Brainstormer 3000\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-10936\" height=\"640\" width=\"852\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-3000.jpg 852w, https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-3000-300x225.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 852px) 100vw, 852px\" \/><\/a><br \/>But, before you get a sneak peak into the mechanics of it all, you must watch and listen to this video in its entirety as you read (a requirement already specified by the Brainstormer):<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"One Night in Bangkok  -  Murray Head  (HQ Audio)\" width=\"450\" height=\"338\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/P9mwELXPGbA?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>It was the early 2000\u2019s, right after the dot.com bubble burst, and IBM was looking to offload its proprietary software. Unfortunately for BTSH, we bought one of their \u201cbusiness machines\u201d thinking the time value of preview writing would pay off. At that time, little did we know that IBM also loved wrestling, a future team named the Elves, and could not write about the LBS. because IBM was 1) jealous of their acronym and 2) didn\u2019t know anybody on that dream team to write into their algorithm. But, we bought the BTSH Brainstormer 3000 anyways for, well, $3,000. It turns out that this wasn\u2019t an algorithm at all, but really a $3,000 piece of shit Microsoft Excel macro, and all it did was randomly select a predetermined topic.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-Blackbox.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-Blackbox.jpg\" alt=\"BTSH Brainstormer Blackbox\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-10937\" height=\"436\" width=\"783\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-Blackbox.jpg 783w, https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-Blackbox-300x167.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 783px) 100vw, 783px\" \/><\/a><br \/>This week, however, the BTSH Brainstormer 3000 finally selected an uncanny and mostly unwritten about team this year\u2014Gut Rot\u2014so Diane Johnston, you owe me a beer.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Fresh Kills at Mega Touch<\/strong> <br \/>Fortunately for Mega Touch, the BTSH Brainstormer 3000 did not pick its longtime favorite of \u201cNo Mention of Mega Touch In Preview\u201d. So, Mega Touch, are you going to pull off a win?! <\/p>\n<p>Ben Chadwick: I think Mega Touch\u2019s odds of winning are very slim. <br \/>John Walker: Mention something about Keogan&#8230;..<br \/>Sam Norris: I\u2019m trying to write the previews, but all these guys want to do is play the ukulele\u2026<\/p>\n<p><strong>Butchers at Corlears Hookers<\/strong><br \/>John Walker: If the Butchers can pull off dueling hat tricks again this week, they&#8217;ll likely win. Or if Dana goes on a tear again.<br \/>Ben Chadwick: If I can score two goals on the Hookers, then I\u2019m sure Jeff L. can score at least ten!<br \/>Sam Norris: Hookers supposedly beat Filthier with only 5 or 6 people, so it\u2019ll be a tough game for my loved ones!<br \/><strong><br \/>Gouging Anklebiters at Sky Fighters<\/strong><br \/>Ben Chadwick: Hey\u2014that rhymes!<br \/>John Walker: I predict Kucera shaves 10 seconds off his natural hat trick time this week.<br \/>Sam Norris: This might be the game of the week, if it wasn\u2019t for the fact that Ben and I are drunk and can\u2019t think of a non-sequitur game of the week elsewhere in the world. That\u2019s right\u2014this is the GAME OF THE WEEK!!! <br \/><strong><br \/>Gut Rot at Rehabs<\/strong><br \/>Sam Norris: Hey Ben, what are you currently playing on your ukulele right now? I\u2019m trying to think, but this \u2018Beautiful Balloon\u2019 song is killing me. What do you think about for the Gut Rot v. Rehabs game? Both Gut Rot and the Rehabs are coming off losses from last week, so this should be one of the games of the week (but not thee game of the week as mentioned above!).<br \/>Ben Chadwick: Would you like to ride in my beautiful balloon?! I think, I think, I don\u2019t know how this game is going to turn out, but I\u2019ll be watching something else.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=_ii_WugJEJg\">https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=_ii_WugJEJg<\/a><\/p>\n<p>John Walker: Awesome\u2014The 5th Dimension! No, no, not an exclamation point! No, no semicolon either! Sam, just put in a period!<br \/><strong><br \/>Dark Rainbows at Tompkins Square Riots<\/strong><br \/>John Walker: Rainbows\/Riots&#8230;&#8230;Rainbows\/Riots&#8230;&#8230;let me think about this one real quick. Underrated goalies -Dave and that new goalie dude from the Rainbows both don\u2019t get enough cred. I predict a goalie battle here.<br \/>That goalie dude from the Rainbows used to play out with his old school Mylec goalie mask, Sam did you ever see him do that \u2014 it was fucking awesome.<br \/>Sam Norris: His name is Kevin Longwell! His name is Kevin Longwell! His name is Kevin Longwell! &#8212; Side note\u2014I was intimidated by that goalie mask wearing player.<\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"His Name is Robert Paulson\" width=\"450\" height=\"338\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/GCi_PIz5ekU?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>Ben Chadwick: Dark Rainbows at Tompkins Square Riots?! That would have been a good NY Post headline in 1990.<\/p>\n<p><strong>What The Puck at Filthier<\/strong><br \/>Ben Chadwick: Where the fuck is Wallace?! <br \/>Sam Norris: Where the hell is that quote from? What does that mean, Ben?<br \/>Ben Chadwick: It\u2019s from The Wire.<br \/>John Walker: I\u2019ve never seen The Wire.<br \/><strong><br \/>Denim Demons at Mathematics<\/strong><br \/>John Walker: I haven\u2019t seen Coach in weeks.<br \/>Ben Chadwick: Demons and Math, huh\u2026 Where the fuck is Wallace?!<br \/>Sam Norris: Damn, Math! We\u2019ve got half our team OOO and Rox is injured\u2014fuck!!! Well, it should still be a good game. Lee, Paul, Nick, &amp; Nathan: loser pays bar tab at our next Fishmarket trip.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Poutine Machine at Cobra Kai<\/strong><br \/>Ben Chadwick: These are two things I don\u2019t want to eat.<br \/>John Walker: No, seriously, where the fuck is Coach?<br \/>Sam Norris: Will Poutine notch a win against a highly underrated team?! Will Altman intimidate Poutine with funny and weird Mexican wrestling masks?! I don\u2019t know, but this will be a fun and good game!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Instant Karma at LBS, Inc.<\/strong><br \/>Ben Chadwick: Yo, where the fuck is Wallace?! No, shit, this is my team\u2014I\u2019m going to say something better than that! We don\u2019t have to have a literal transcript: stop typing everything I say! I think Karma is going to win.<br \/>John Walker: I hope Karma needs subs tomorrow because I want to play 2 games. Oh, shit, we\u2019re playing at the same time\u2026<br \/>Sam Norris: Pounds\u2014they\u2019re pretty good this year. Karma\u2014they\u2019re also pretty good this year. Where the fuck is Ryann Geldner?!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Happy Little Elves at Gremlins<\/strong><br \/>Since this is the last preview, we reran the BTSH Brainstormer 3000\u2014and you won\u2019t believe what it had to say!<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-3000-V2.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-3000-V2.jpg\" alt=\"BTSH Brainstormer 3000 V2\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-10940\" height=\"438\" width=\"773\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-3000-V2.jpg 773w, https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/BTSH-Brainstormer-3000-V2-300x170.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 773px) 100vw, 773px\" \/><\/a><br \/>The Brainstormer predicted rain fears\u2014despite the other court playing, this game is going to be rained out! <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Were you ever wondering how BTSH media decided to write on a certain topic? Were you subsequently wondering why you or your team may have not been getting much BTSH media love this year?! Well, this is a story of great proportions with roots to the same underlying problems of so much of the troubles [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1636,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10935","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-league-info"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10935"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1636"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10935"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10935\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10952,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10935\/revisions\/10952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10935"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10935"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10935"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}