{"id":11595,"date":"2015-10-14T12:56:36","date_gmt":"2015-10-14T16:56:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/?p=11595"},"modified":"2018-09-17T15:26:24","modified_gmt":"2018-09-17T19:26:24","slug":"3-stars-of-the-round-of-16","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/3-stars-of-the-round-of-16\/","title":{"rendered":"3 Stars of the Round of 16!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"3<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

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Written by JW<\/em><\/p>\n

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3rd star: The late scrimmage clean-up crew<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Future<\/a>

Apparently Derek was on clean-up duty elsewhere.<\/p><\/div>\n

(‘Future Derek’ photo credit: Alex Eben Meyer)
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

BTSH, we are perhaps the most disgusting people on the planet. I swear that at various points I saw someone in the clean-up crew carrying a dirty diaper, a hypodermic needle, and a plastic grocery bag full of vomit. I mean, who does that? \u00a0Who pukes in a bag and then leaves it there?? \u00a0Everyone knows that behind the tree is the designated puking spot. You should all be ashamed of yourselves. Well, except those of you who helped clean up.
\nThis crew of BTSHers, headed up by Timmy and Eli (big ups), accomplished what no one else wanted to do, without being asked. I decided as I was helping clean up to talk to some of the other peeps helping.\u00a0\u00a0Responses ranged from “The more people who help the quicker we get done” to “yo J Dubs, toss me that empty can of Piels” to Diane Johnston’s “Oh gross, no no NO, please tell DO NOT me that is a dead rat. GAH-ross! Aaaaaaah!”.\u00a0It was great to see everyone come together and pitch in to get the courts clean after the late scrims. Just another example of the sense of community which is engrained in BTSH. And, through it all……….I think I still have a bloody Band-Aid stuck to the bottom of my hockey sneakers.<\/p>\n

2nd star: Scott Kaston – Lbs, Inc.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Scott<\/a>

Yo assholes, I just got my first career hat trick, ya heard?? (mic drop)<\/p><\/div>\n

Scott amassed an even BIGGER cheering section this week and they were even MORE loud and obnoxious. \u00a0And we all loved it, even MORE. I mean, these kids were OFF THE WALL this week. \u00a0I swear I saw them line up and do a spanking machine after the game. \u00a0But perhaps my eyes deceived me. Apparently this larger more raucous crowd propelled Scott to new heights as he scored his first career hat trick in the most important game of his rookie year. This was enough to take down the mighty Hookers (Scott 3, Hookers 2). \u00a0While the Lbs. were technically favored in this matchup, we all know how lethal the Hookers are. Attendance issues plagued them this year which caused them to be the 13 seed, yet those attendance issues rarely seem to plague the Hookers in the post-season. Rich tells me that this is only the 2nd time ever that the Hookers have been eliminated before the semi-finals, and this is the earliest they have EVER been eliminated. This of course is a huge feat, and due in large part to Scott’s play on Sunday. \u00a0I asked him how he did it, and he replied “You know, man, I just, well, it’s like….(chugs half a beer and then spikes the half-full can on the ground incredibly hard) Woooooo!!! Fuck yeah man!!!” \u00a0Wow, this kid is as amped up as the crew that comes to watch him play.<\/p>\n

1st star of the week: \u00a0The Gremlins<\/p>\n

\"Gremlins<\/a>
\n\"Allison<\/a>
\n(photo credit: Tia Lendo)<\/em><\/p>\n

(written by league face, Zach Norris)<\/p>\n

Narrator:<\/b> “It was a beautiful Sunday<\/span><\/span>.\u00a0 A particularly beautiful day for an upset in playoff street hockey.\u00a0 The Denim Demons were to face off against the Gremlins.\u00a0 The odds were stacked against the Gremmies at a height much greater than the stacked pads of Aaron “Pipe Controller” Pagdon.”<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
\n

Ryan “Jeter Who? I am THE Captain” Mills:<\/b> “Hey! Narrator! What the hell are you talking about?!\u00a0 We are the 8th seed, Demons the 9th.\u00a0 MY Gremlins beat the Demons in the regular season.\u00a0 How the hell can we be the under dog!?\u00a0 Explain to me how…”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n<\/div>\n

<\/div>\n
Narrator:<\/b> “Shut up Ryan, it is better if I tell the story.\u00a0 I don’t have all that much else to do, I am a damn narrator and nobody wants to hear a story about an upper dog. \u00a0ah-hem (throat clears).\u00a0 As I was saying… The Gremlins stood no chance.\u00a0 In a world where evil always triumphs, it would once again.\u00a0 All was going to plan, Demons took the 1-0 lead and kept the Gremlins silent for the entire game.\u00a0 The game was tight, both sides looking for that one more tickle of the twine.\u00a0 Gremlins needing that equalizer and the Demons needing to buy a little insurance as time was running thin.\u00a0 One minute and counting, Gremlin netminder Jamie “Sure, I’ll play for you!” B sprints to the bench to give his squad that extra offensive muscle.\u00a0 Twenty seconds left, Gremlins are pressing in their offensive zone, but it’s not looking too promising.\u00a0 But the Gremlins didn’t give a damn about the odds of promise, because with thirteen seconds to go, Rod “Sure Lumber” Sherwood became all too available in front of the net and connected on a backhand that sent this game into overtime.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
The game tying goal caused the Demons to turn it up to 11 during the ten minute overtime.\u00a0 Tons of pressure in their offensive zone.\u00a0 And then the reward: \u00a0Goal! Goal! The Demons answer and send the Gremlins packing.\u00a0 But wait!\u00a0 The ref is waiving his arms in a side to side manner that usually means no goal?! The refs have consensus, there was a Demon foot in the crease, no goal.\u00a0 An even angrier Demon squad continues to press and press in the closing moments of overtime.\u00a0 The Gremlins politely respond with “No, you may not have another goal” and the overtime ended.\u00a0 This was going to a shootout.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
The shootout got off to a quick start, with goals from Gremlin Erich “I gots the hands” Graham and Demon Josh “Mess with the Rose, get the Thorn” Rosen.\u00a0 The shootout would remain at 1-1.\u00a0 Allison “Trickle Treat” Busch steps up to shoot for the Gremlins.\u00a0 She cruised toward the net and unleashed a low shot.\u00a0 Demon tender Coach goes down and appears to make the save.\u00a0 There is an odd silence in the air.\u00a0 No whistle for a goal, no whistle for a save\/dead ball.\u00a0 Coach stopped 90% of that shot.\u00a0 But that 10% was all the Gremlins needed as that ball rolled at approx. two miles per hour into the net.\u00a0 The Gremlins win! the Gremlins win!<\/div>\n
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\n

For this battle, the Gremlins undoubtedly hold 1st star of the week, excellent game!<\/p>\n

Honorable mention: The goalies<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Hockey_Mask_Jason\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Sorry I didnt have room for all of you, fellas. But here is something the BTSH universe may not realize, yet it definitely caught the eye of yours truly: Of 12 play off games played thus far, including the play-in games, 7 of those have been shutouts. \u00a0MORE THAN HALF, that is a just plain amazing stat. Thus far, shutouts were logged by: Dave Gil de Rubio, “His Name Is” Kevin Longwell, Mike Maloney, Tim Kayiatos, James Stein, Showtime “Retired” Melendez, and Dave Liang. Additionally, this week Craig got what I am told was only his 2nd career playoff win. (Seriously, even with all those shots I used to block for you, dude? Hmm, this doesn’t sound accurate.), and Ramirez held the always dangerous Sky Fighters to only 1 goal, keeping his team in the game the whole time. Also, we all know from the 1st star write-up what Jamie B. did this week. It is no secret that I am a huge goalie fan, but, let’s all tip our hats this week, kids.<\/p>\n

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 <\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  Written by JW   3rd star: The late scrimmage clean-up crew (‘Future Derek’ photo credit: Alex Eben Meyer) BTSH, we are perhaps the most disgusting people on the planet. I swear that at various points I saw someone in the clean-up crew carrying a dirty diaper, a hypodermic needle, and a plastic grocery bag […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1401,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11595","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-league-info"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11595"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1401"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11595"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11595\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11610,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11595\/revisions\/11610"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11595"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11595"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11595"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}