![\"Danielle](\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/02\/Danielle-Pandering-for-Black-Robs-Vote.jpg\")
<\/a>Danielle with one of her many bribed superdelegates<\/p><\/div>\n
Danielle has held various jobs over the years, the hallmark\u2014outside of being an operations manager for Maple Water, a Happy Tree product\u2014has been an NYC Social kickball league manager, where she organized the league registrations, obtained the city permits, sent weekly emails to the league\u2019s teams, and of course, ran the whole damn thing.<\/p>\n
Okay, okay\u2014I started writing this article before I knew she was running. It really screwed up my whole dichotomy and the \u201conly electable female candidate\u201d schtick because I thought Ashley was the only female candidate\u2026 Anyways, Danielle is running, but if you came here to get a quick laugh in, which should be the only reason you read BTSH articles, then go to CollegeHumor or something, because the following probably isn\u2019t funny, unless your humor benchmark is Glanzer humour, in which case anything else you read will clearly over-index in funniness. Glanzer humour of course spelled with a \u201cu\u201d because the Brits aren\u2019t at all funny, either…<\/p>\n
Ashley McMasters:<\/p>\n
Ashley has struggled hard this race because BTSHers find her to be too much part of the establishment. Being long-time boyfriends with another league member who also has reffed awhile has helped and hurt her cause. \u00a0When they first joined the league, they had reffed and passed certain rules, and now as the league has changed, they now ref under different rules, trying to make the most people happy all the time. Additionally, she is currently under security review after viewing Top Secret BTSH Media Franchise Four content she was not authorized or cleared to view. The BTSH Media keeps this under strict security for fear of people literally dying from laughter and ever since Craig LaCombe hacked in to post retargeting ads featuring Rich doing various things Rich does.<\/p>\n Ashley, if you had 3 sentences to explain your stance on BTSH and why you\u2019re the best candidate, what would they be?<\/p>\n \u201cI, I mean, WE have done so much the past couple of years\u2014I have the best resume of all the candidates\u2014having been involved in so many ball hockey tournaments, being a USA Hockey ref with my boyfriend\u2014I mean, just because I\u2019m a woman doesn\u2019t mean I can\u2019t be in charge. This league has been backwards and ran by white men for far too long\u2014it\u2019s finally time for when women actually actively run this league! I get it, most of the women in this league are domesticated, 1950 housewives, they\u2019re traditional women with traditional minds\u2014and that\u2019s why I\u2019m the best candidate because I\u2019m a progressive\u2014and will usher these women into 1955! \u00a0<\/p>\n Moderator: BTSHers have said that they can\u2019t trust you, getting free beer for showing up to talk to Filthier and some of the elite league teams, and viewing BTSH Media content you were unauthorized to view. How do you respond?<\/p>\n Ashley:<\/p>\n Look, regarding getting a lot of free beer for hanging out with the Hookers and Filthier, I\u2019ve dated another league member who\u2019s quite well known, so it\u2019s very hard to separate my life from his. They just offered me that beer. Now, I actually didn\u2019t view that content\u2014that was a tech problem that has yet to be resolved. Here\u2019s what happened: I use the same email log-in that Rich Glanzer uses, and he watches so much porn that the emailing system must have gotten a virus and caused a bunch of crawlers to make it look like I was in the system viewing the Franchise Four content, when in actuality, it\u2019s just some Glanzer porn virus!<\/p>\n Some fear that Ashley isn’t a progressive at all, always getting free drinks from elite teams<\/p><\/div> Winning championship team captains are her crutch in this election<\/p><\/div>\n Larry Black:<\/p>\n<\/a><\/p>\n<\/a><\/a>