{"id":12786,"date":"2016-05-26T10:07:46","date_gmt":"2016-05-26T14:07:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/?p=12786"},"modified":"2016-05-26T10:07:46","modified_gmt":"2016-05-26T14:07:46","slug":"the-horses-asses-of-btsh","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/the-horses-asses-of-btsh\/","title":{"rendered":"The Horse’s Asses of BTSH"},"content":{"rendered":"

Well BTSHers, we are a third of the way through the 2016 season and overdue for the first Not Three Stars post. \u00a0But instead of simply stating that these are the opposite of shining moments from game day, we should call them out for what they really are: a Horse\u2019s Ass.,,,,which is breaking the first rule of our oddball league. \u00a0And\u2026.we\u2019re off!
\"Horse's<\/a>
Triple Ass<\/strong>
Rich G. of Fuzz<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Foolish<\/a>

Foolish little girl. This is the oldest wrestling in the book.<\/p><\/div>\n

At the beginning of the season Rich made a pact with himself that if he didn\u2019t score a goal within the first third of the season then it would be open season on all the ladies of BTSH. \u00a0None of us thought that the ladies had anything to worry about. \u00a0I mean, come on, Rich can\u2019t hit the broad side of barn with anything on the line. \u00a0Well on Sunday he unloaded one on his BTSH Newsroom colleague Diana M. \u00a0Aiming for her cheekbones he predictably missed and connected with her collarbone instead and ricocheting up and off her orbital bone. \u00a0Giving her parents who were in attendance a good scare. \u00a0That\u2019s our Richiepoothang. \u00a0Making friends left and right.<\/p>\n

Double Ass
<\/strong>Isaac S. of Instant Karma
<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"And<\/a>

And the winner goes to…<\/p><\/div>\n

Midway through the second half of the match-up against the Riots I got caught up in the moment jostling for position in front of their net. \u00a0Their defender went down and then I eventually went down too. \u00a0Having a momentary lapse in good judgment I gave him a friendly cross-check in the chest as we were both getting up causing a barrage of Riots to rush over and bring me to my senses. \u00a0Tut-tut. \u00a0Not the Karma way. \u00a0Not the BTSH way. \u00a0My head has been hanging in shame since.<\/p>\n

Single Ass<\/strong>
Tompkins Square Hawk of Tompkins Square Park
<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Nobody<\/a>

Nobody stops the TSP Hawk.<\/p><\/div>\n

Note to everyone in the league that likes to bring their cute little companion to the courts on Sunday, the Hawk has taken an interest in them. \u00a0This past Sunday it was seen circling and swooping dangerously low with intent to snatch one of them away. \u00a0It has been suggested that we try and capture the Hawk. Really? \u00a0You people just don\u2019t get it. \u00a0No one stops the Tompkins Square Hawk. \u00a0It laughs in the face of all Asses. \u00a0So this is your warning: keep your pets close and safe, and when playing \u2013 find a babysitter.<\/p>\n

Do you know any Horses Asses? \u00a0Have you had a run in with a Horses Ass and would like to put him or her on blast this season? \u00a0Maybe you\u2019re the Horse\u2019s Ass. \u00a0Send your story over to BTSH.Media@gmail.com<\/a>. \u00a0We\u2019d love to hear from you. \u00a0Best Ass in show gets an Assy Award<\/strong> at the end of the season for being the greatest Ass of 2016! \u00a0We understand that they come in all shapes and sizes, so don\u2019t be shy about sharing yours. \ud83d\ude09<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Well BTSHers, we are a third of the way through the 2016 season and overdue for the first Not Three Stars post. \u00a0But instead of simply stating that these are the opposite of shining moments from game day, we should call them out for what they really are: a Horse\u2019s Ass.,,,,which is breaking the first […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6355,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[279,280],"class_list":["post-12786","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-league-info","tag-assy","tag-award"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12786"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/6355"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12786"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12786\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12797,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12786\/revisions\/12797"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12786"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12786"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12786"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}