{"id":15116,"date":"2017-07-28T08:37:04","date_gmt":"2017-07-28T12:37:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/?p=15116"},"modified":"2017-07-28T08:37:04","modified_gmt":"2017-07-28T12:37:04","slug":"week-14-previews-part-two","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/week-14-previews-part-two\/","title":{"rendered":"Week 14 Previews – Part Two"},"content":{"rendered":"

ATTENTION:<\/strong> if you (BECCA OF GUT ROT<\/strong>) have not done so already, please use this link<\/a> to sign up for this Sunday\u2019s Olympic events. Do you think you have what it takes to dethrone Gut Rot from the 2 Girls 1 Cup event? \u00a0(Please note that Beer Pong is only for after the Olympics and will not be an event during the Olympics.)<\/p>\n

Rehabs at Sky Fighters<\/strong>
\nby Arya Stark<\/em><\/p>\n

Sparks\u00a0are sure to fly\u00a0Sunday<\/span><\/span>\u00a0when league leading goal scorer Mike Teytlebaum leads the Sky Fighters into battle against the defending champion Rehabs.\u00a0 This should be a tense rematch of last year’s semifinal which the Rehabs took 2-1 en route to the title.\u00a0 Sky Fighters are on a mini roll having won three of their last four games led by Mike, who has picked up an absurd 60% of his team’s goals this season.\u00a0 For reference, NHL teams in 2016-17 averaged 227 goals on the season; his pace would thus be about the equivalent of a 136 goal season in the NHL.\u00a0 Forget Rocket Richard; that’s Art Ross worthy right there.\u00a0 He’ll face a stiff test against an elite Rehabs defense and one of the top netminders in the league, no matter who suits up (hopefully it won’t be\u00a0both<\/a>).\u00a0 The x-factor here will be whether the Sky Fighters defense can stand up to Cherie and co. and keep the game close enough for Mike and Olivier to break it open.<\/p>\n

Prediction:<\/em>\u00a0Mike keeps his scoring streak alive but Rehabs still take the W 4-2.<\/p>\n

Fuzz (L\/W\/W\/SO\/W) at Fresh Kills (W\/W\/W\/W\/W), Tompkins West, 1645<\/strong>
\nby Hornswoggle<\/em><\/p>\n[Apparently played prior to publishing this article, with Fuzz ripping Kills\u2019 streak into pieces after regulation, 4-3. So\u2026 why the f did I agree to write this?!]<\/span><\/p>\n

When Fuzz\u2019s own players are arguing that the Sultan\u2019s absence is what caused their win streak, let\u2019s just remind them that they did eke out a win last week against the wavering Riots <\/span>with<\/span><\/i> Rich present. But a five-game losing streak between weeks 5 and 9 was quite unbecoming of them. Either the league in general is taking the game a little more seriously (I\u2019m looking at you, Gut Rot), or Gil\u2019s son and Gil\u2019s son\u2019s Dad are finding bigger fish to fry, e.g. NSDH or even Moffo.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>

Fuzz 2017 (collage credit: Jamie B.)<\/p><\/div>\n

Conversely, look at the team that can\u2019t even lose even if Barch took a water break without calling one. A 13-game win streak is that which no social sports league can even fathom; in fact, players on every team are familiar with the current Kills roster, so if we know their weaknesses, why can\u2019t we exploit them? Well, well, well: the old adage is that a team is more than the sum of its players, so whatever Soko puts in his water bottle before the game\u2014probably a stronger variant of Pedialyte\u2014it is surely working on him (and his team, assuming he makes them drink, too).<\/span><\/p>\n

Prediction:\u00a0<\/em>I see Miles and Walsh putting a spring in their step(s) and hitting Barch with everything they\u2019ve got early on. Face it, the Sultan cajoling with Soko and Gabe pre-game won\u2019t work (so keep the speech short, k?). Pleasantries aside, Ariel\u2019s incisive drive to the net, inspired by Emmitt Smith\u2019s footwork on <\/span>Dancing with the Stars<\/span><\/i>, guarantees his squad the lead, which might as well be permanent knowing Fuzz\u2019s track record with mid-table to strong teams. Fresh Kills takes the game by two\u2026 and hopefully I still keep my conference name after Sunday.<\/span><\/p>\n

Corlears Hookers (L\/OT\/W\/W\/W) at What the Puck (W\/L\/L\/W\/L), Tompkins West, 1645<\/strong>
\nby Hornswoggle<\/em><\/p>\n

The\u00a0duel between Pro and Cro last week turned out unanimously in favor of Cro, who cashed one in for a total of 9. Critics might say that the team\u2019s last three (Rainbows, Karma, Anklebiters) might well have been written off, given that none of them have been significant threats this season. But considering two of their ladies (Tiffany, Jenna H.) are in the female top scorers\u2019 list, their dominance resides in the two players you\u2019re supposed to keep on the court at all times, per regulation.<\/span><\/p>\n

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What The Puck 2017 (collage credit: Jamie B.)<\/p><\/div>\n

While\u00a0celebrating Captain Emily\u2019s 30<\/span>th<\/span> (happy birthday, cap!), the Orange Crush played the cabana boys and girls known as LBS, Inc. I\u2019m confident the predominantly Caps crew continued the festivities despite falling 5-2, and that the next few weeks bring on a more lax schedule than the tumultuous easy-hard-easy-hard last four (Riots, Gremmies, Rainbows, LBS). The homestretch should be an opportune time for Zac to bolster his scoring record, because he\u2019s certainly good enough to give Sky\u2019s Mike T. a run for his money in the race for the BTSH <\/span>Pichichi.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Prediction:<\/em>\u00a0I hope Claire has a great game. Although short in stature, her positioning is impeccable\u2014she got that playing ice at Lasker. She\u2019ll have to look after Tiffany and Noelle diligently. At the other end of the court, Bill\u2019s responsibility will be to parry Zac; a battle between who\u2019s got the mitts and who\u2019s got the wheels will be prevalent. Enter stage left Scotty H., the former Poutine netminder: if his Puck defense comes through, he\u2019ll have no troubles whatsoever. Conversely, if Cro asks for another goalie again, there\u2019s a good chance Captain Em may not approve and the Hookers will be sent back out into the streets. But I\u2019m going with the underdog and gunning for Puck by 1.<\/span><\/p>\n

Gremlins (L\/W\/W\/W\/W) at Cobra Kai (W\/W\/W\/W\/W)<\/strong><\/p>\n

Hockey Night in Tompkins [National Telecast]<\/i>, Tompkins East, 1800<\/strong><\/p>\n

by Hornswoggle<\/em><\/p>\n

The\u00a0Gremmies have seemingly faced the worst of their schedule and have emerged swimmingly. According to the tall skinny dude in the helmet known as Walker, he has never experienced this great degree of success like this before. Keep pinching yourself, John\u2026 this is real (and unfortunate for the rest of the league! haha). Third in goal differential with +24, he can rest easy knowing that even if he runs another marathon, it\u2019s not like they lose their scoring machines [\/eyeroll].<\/span><\/p>\n

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Gremlins 2017 (collage credit: Jamie B.)<\/p><\/div>\n

The\u00a0Dojo is one of five teams that have achieved a win streak of 5 or more (Gremmies W4-W8; Butchers W5-W12; Poutine W5-W9; Fresh Kills undefeated), and blanking the Demons last week should give them the mental and emotional fortitude to put the Gremmies to rest on Sunday. They sit atop the Katz Division, but a loss would threaten their position and their unblemished divisional record. Campbell potentially faces his toughest adversary yet, league photographer Jamie.<\/span><\/p>\n

Prediction:<\/em>\u00a0Four Gremmie players account for 68% of goal scoring (32\/47), but Campbell has been able to leave opponents emptyhanded twice more than Jamie. Despite the common conceptions of this becoming a high-scoring, goalie-blasting competition, I believe both Jamie and Campbell will stop nearly everything. The Dojo\u2019s known offensive trident will be eclipsed by secondary scoring (Peter G., Tom) only because the Gremmies won\u2019t expect it; similarly, the Gremmies will encourage Ryan and Mark M. to join the fray and strike when unexpected. That said, I think our furry creatures in canary will seize the day after regulation.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mega Touch (W\/W\/L\/L\/L) at Instant Karma (W\/OT\/L\/L\/L)<\/strong><\/p>\n

Hockey Night in Tompkins [Regional Telecast]<\/i>, Tompkins West, 1800<\/strong><\/p>\n

by Hornswoggle<\/em><\/p>\n

Both\u00a0these teams have a three-game losing streak, and they\u2019ll perceive their future schedules as formidable. They have players that have outwardly indicated signs of wear-and-tear (Alex a bloody scalp, and Nicole a sat-on ankle), and even \u201cold\u201d age\u2014note to self, Chadtrick is <\/span>really<\/span><\/i> 28, and Yuri just graduated from college\u2026 presumably.<\/span><\/p>\n

Let\u00a0last week\u2019s games demonstrate how cruel the hockey gods were: both opponents for both Mega and Karma were in the second (CMB) division; they both had 7 wins, and their differential was in the single digits. With Mike T. being the outlier in terms of stats (read: scoring ranking) since he\u2019s at the very top, no one on either Math or Sky Fighters\u2014not even the goaltenders Liang and Stein\u2014seems to be an apparent threat to other teams. To sum up, the W13 games were winnable and unfortunately the odds weren\u2019t even in Mega or Karma\u2019s favor. Bluntly: they fluffed it.<\/span><\/p>\n

Prediction:\u00a0<\/em>having gotten over the spoiled memories of W13, this Sunday is a good chance for Isaac and Alok to redeem and rejuvenate their teams\u2019 spirits. In the battle between the person that\u2019s hard to dislike and the Messi-loving league mediaman\/heartthrob, I think our jort-wearing jewels just might snatch a goal from depleted Karma very late in the game (certainly that\u2019ll come back to me, won\u2019t it).<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

ATTENTION: if you (BECCA OF GUT ROT) have not done so already, please use this link to sign up for this Sunday\u2019s Olympic events. Do you think you have what it takes to dethrone Gut Rot from the 2 Girls 1 Cup event? \u00a0(Please note that Beer Pong is only for after the Olympics and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6355,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[264],"class_list":["post-15116","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-league-info","tag-previews"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15116"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/6355"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15116"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15116\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15127,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15116\/revisions\/15127"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15116"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15116"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15116"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}