{"id":15940,"date":"2017-11-10T09:33:10","date_gmt":"2017-11-10T14:33:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/?p=15940"},"modified":"2017-11-10T09:33:10","modified_gmt":"2017-11-10T14:33:10","slug":"half-assed-championship-preview","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/half-assed-championship-preview\/","title":{"rendered":"Half-Assed Championship Preview"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Arya Stark and JW<\/em><\/p>\n

So at this point, unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’re probably aware that the semis and championship will be taking place on the same day.\u00a0\u00a0Previews for the semifinals<\/a>\u00a0were posted before the rain fears but to get you through the championship without actually going through the effort of writing four potential previews (three of which would end up being completely superfluous), we took the easy way out and just had a gchat conversation about it instead of working.\u00a0 Think of it as a written version of a podcast because clearly JW would never consent to doing anything as millennial\u00a0as an actual podcast.<\/p>\n

W:\u00a0<\/b>ok I forget our plan…what are we doing here again?<\/div>\n

Arya:<\/b>\u00a0haha no plan really – just a free flowing convo which i am then going to try to somehow edit into a reasonably coherent piece.<\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0i can\u2019t even remember what we are discussing…previews, right?<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:<\/b>\u00a0potential championship previews<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>ah thats right.\u00a0\u00a0there we go.\u00a0\u00a0my idea was for them to be really short and stupid\u2026ha.<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>short – unlikely.\u00a0\u00a0stupid – guaranteed.<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0i feel like you’re going to want to talk about actual hockey…you know i don\u2019t know anything about sports though?<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>jw please, you are the quintessential jock…i saw you take charlotte\u2019s lunch money and stuff her in a locker.\u00a0 plus your\u00a0prom attire<\/a>\u00a0speaks for itself.<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>it’s funny you say that because Charlotte does call me a bully.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>ok potential championship matchups – lets start with lbs \/ fresh kills<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0i thought we were just doing the potential final matchups. that isn\u2019t one. (the fools who pick 2 teams who play each other to advance are rubbing off on you)<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>oh yeah, youre actually correct<\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0i sure am<\/p>\n

Arya:<\/b>\u00a0dick<\/p>\n

ok rehabs\/lbs then\u2026championship rematch.\u00a0\u00a0on paper it seems like a blowout…2 vs 8 seed, plus the fact that last year the rehabs won and cherie went from lbs to rehabs.\u00a0\u00a0but lbs swept the season series, plus in the playoffs anything can happen<\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0i love that you answered your own question. see, you don’t need me!<\/p>\n

The Rehabs will be fired up, both to erase the season series sweep by Lbs. and to move on to the final to defend their title.<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>i wonder if there might be a sense of overconfidence if they get there and realize they don’t have to face fresh kills, which i\u2019m sure they\u2019re expecting<\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0I agree that if the Habs arrive at the final and it isn’t against FK, they will be relieved….maybe too relieved. (insert joke about someone relieving themself on the rink).\u00a0\u00a0Fresh Kills could be cocky too.<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>because of their record and 9-0 aggregate beating of the lbs in the regular season?<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>9-0??? Over Lbs.??\u00a0 Is that true???\u00a0\u00a0I am not sure how I missed that box score. (Jeff probably still hasn’t posted it.)<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>even #fuzznation appreciates a good fuzz burn<\/span><\/p>\n

what do you see rehabs\/lbs being like stylistically?<\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0it’s hard for me to predict a Lbs. win, but I honestly wouldn’t be surprised.<\/p>\n

stylistically, it will be really good hockey. Both teams control and move the puck well….with the Rehabs always looking for the open player. Lbs can sometimes be a little more run and gun…but that will be tough against the Rehabs’ defense.\u00a0 definitely do not think this game will be the blowout that a 2 v 8 seed normally could be.<\/p>\n

Also, it will be difficult for Lbs. to score with both Ramirez and Showtime in net at the same time.<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>we\u2019ll need to check the rulebook on that one.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>lbs are a strange team – seeded 8th, but 6-2 against the first division with two losses to fresh kills and a sweep against all others.\u00a0\u00a0also, if its rehabs\/lbs and lbs find a way to win, is cherie the BTSH marian hossa?<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>if that happens it will be a great matchup.\u00a0 Hmm…..Rehabs\/Lbs…..i’d say it goes to OT……Karsten gets the game winner.<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>lets move on to the next.\u00a0\u00a0rehabs\/fresh kills – its chalk, the matchup everyones expecting<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>You mean the matchup no one wants\u2026no underdog to root for\u2026<\/p>\n

Arya:<\/b>\u00a0ya i guess in this scenario lbs and filthy qualify as underdogs even though only four points separated the 2 seed (rehabs) from the 8 (lbs)<\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0it’s really true<\/p>\n

it was so tight (insert sexual joke here)<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>ok so Habs\/Kills….two teams with some of the best female players in the league.\u00a0 you\u2019ve got cherie\/amber\/sena\/monique\/lind<\/wbr>sey vs roxy\/nicole\/sheena\/can’t remember other names.\u00a0 who has the edge?<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0i think overall the Rehabs have the best women in the league<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>how do fresh kills have such a better record? it seems like having such an advantage in the female department would be massive in a co-ed league<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>It really is shocking.\u00a0\u00a0I don’t understand how they managed to avoid losing a single game in regulation\u2026<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>the shift of gabe to defense has been inspired<\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>\u00a0definitely<\/p>\n

I also think the Rehabs had attendance issues, but having either Gabe or Ariel on D throughout the entire game is stiffling.\u00a0 With Gabe and Ariel and Roxy…..the Kills may have the edge on defense, but the Rehabs have the edge in goaltending.<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>would you believe that ramirez has yet to give up a goal thus far in the playoffs?\u00a0\u00a0twin shutouts.\u00a0\u00a0his fantasy owners are no doubt ecstatic, led by none other than ramirez himself<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>he also has great defense in front of him,\u00a0but he\u2019s a stellar goalie<\/span><\/p>\n

one year he subbed in for another team on the final game of the regular season and his winning that game helped Gut Rot (who was his full-time team at the time) avoid the play-in game. If I recall….the Hookers were the team he beat. I can’t recall who he was playing for. But he also won his Gut Rot game that day. It was awesome.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

SULTAN FACT CHECK: “<\/i><\/b>Eric actually won 3 games that day. The first was FK beating the Hookers 1-0. The best part was he was the Gut Rot goalie and during a late timeout, he had all the FK players huddled around him as he gave a speech. But Walker was right, it was indeed awesome. (And I think he got at least 2 shutouts, if not three)”<\/i><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>what would your prediction be for that game?<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>i feel like i should be working since i am off thurs, fri and mon. ha (editors note: WRONG)<\/p>\n

I predict a Rehabs win. You heard it here first. Fresh Kills suffers their first regulation loss of the season.\u00a0 3-2 Rehabs. Maybe even 4-2.<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>ok so we’ve done the two rehabs matchups but lets say filthy is super pumped after having half the team run the marathon last week and they make it to the finals against the fresh kills.\u00a0 the big storyline there would be that filthy was the only team to beat fresh kills this season, albeit in a somewhat controversial shootout.\u00a0 how do you see that going?<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>The shootout was only controversial after it was over…..the ball was in first…..<\/p>\n

Though I do think Barch personally will be hungry to avenge that loss.\u00a0\u00a0However, Filthier will be hard-pressed to win that game while missing both Dennis and Suvin.\u00a0\u00a0But I wouldnt be surprised if one or both of them makes it back\u00a0on Sunday<\/span><\/span><\/span><\/span>….<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>have they played five games?\u00a0\u00a0if not, would be interesting whether they\u2019re given an exemption<\/p>\n

JW:<\/b>they would have to had asked for the exemption already.\u00a0\u00a0and while we’re at it let’s talk about how stupid the exemption vote is….I maintain that it should just be like the regular season, with someone borrowing a player from another team……the captain of the opposing team has to approve it, individually, game by game. Period.<\/p>\n

It’s ridiculous that someone else is voting who can play against MY team.<\/p>\n

(this should all be in the article too, by the way. ha)<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>oh by the way ill try to send you a proof of this before the ranger game<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>ok cool, thanks<\/p>\n

i have tricia\u00a0tonight<\/span><\/span><\/span>, but should be able to look at it later<\/p>\n

*trivia<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>oh\u00a0<\/b>i assumed tricia was a ladyfriend of yours<\/p>\n

“i have tricia\u00a0tonight<\/span><\/span><\/span>”\u00a0YEAH JW<\/p>\n

final four features four excellent goalies…three are undoubtedly among leagues best (barch, ramirez, tim k) and zisser is one of the top rookies, especially when it comes to alcoholism.\u00a0\u00a0his unorthodox style works in the net and, from what I\u2019ve been told, in the bedroom.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>absolutely<\/p>\n

personally, I havent seen Zisser play much\u2026<\/p>\n

and weirdly I have never really seen Barch play much.\u00a0\u00a0i guess I dont find myself watching Fresh Kills much.<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>you’re all underdog all the time.\u00a0\u00a0most of the league is though.\u00a0 i mean who wasn’t pulling for math in that crazy QF match?<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>i dunno about that one, a lot of people wanted Kai to win too, especially because Kai could have given the 1st division teams a run for their money.<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>i meant the crazy math\/fresh kills game where they were up, then down, then tied it late<\/p>\n

but on that topic, i was surprised kai went down so early…having put together the playoff pool, they were an incredibly popular sleeper pick.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>so heres the thing –\u00a0as we alluded to earlier, this was really an interesting year for the league, with standings so packed (aside from FK) yet you look at the final four and its four first division teams.\u00a0 do you think this indicates there is a lot of parity, or no parity at all?<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>i think we THOUGHT there was more parity this year (and to an extent, there was)….but it ended up maybe being an illusion.\u00a0\u00a0we just got more of the same, in the end. Four 1st division teams.<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>but how much of that is the first division teams being best, and how much is a coincidence?\u00a0\u00a0i mean lbs almost lost to WTP in the first round, math almost took out fresh kills in the QF…both were lucky to survive.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>i do think there may have been some luck involved…..<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>do you think the parity in the league is an issue?<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>Rich does.\u00a0 (dammit, he came up!\u00a0 I was hoping he wouldn’t.)<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:<\/b>\u00a0rich doesn’t care about parity!\u00a0\u00a0he wants every game to be the hunger games<\/span><\/p>\n

where he plays the part of\u00a0katniss<\/a>\u00a0when in reality he’s almost literally\u00a0president snow<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>rich thinks there should be two championships….like in OC.\u00a0\u00a0he’s been saying it for years. he feels no lower division team can win it all anymore. i disagree. and was hoping to prove him wrong with Cobra Kai this season<\/span><\/p>\n

ok….i cant talk THAT much longer and we have only done 2 matchups….and barely done those.\u00a0 haha<\/span><\/p>\n

wow, look at me, actually be the one COMBATING the ADHD<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>late nomination for upset of the year: JW combating ADHD rather than contributing to it<\/span><\/p>\n

ok so filthy\/fresh kills\u2026how do you see that going?<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>i see Fresh Kills playing a possession game….it will be tough for Filthy to play a possession game being that they are missing 2 of their stars.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And while they have added a couple good guys this season…..those guys arent Dennis and Suvin.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

But Tim will remain steadfast in net, and give them a chance. Ultimately, I’m sorry to say…..I see Fresh Kills taking this one.<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>if they win, is that the greatest season in btsh history?<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>I believe it would be.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

SULTAN FACT CHECK:\u00a0<\/b>“I don’t remember anyone having a better season besides the 2010 Elves.<\/i>“<\/i><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>This article is going to be terrible. Why are you making me talk about sports??<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>YOU LOVE SPORTS<\/span><\/p>\n

ok and finally, lbs vs filthy<\/span><\/p>\n

shockingly, lbs swept season series<\/span><\/p>\n

6-3 and then 5-1,\u00a0the 5-1 game being\u00a0karsten’s heroic martin st louis moment<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>I seem to remember the 6-3 score, and being surprised Filthy gave up that many…<\/span><\/p>\n

hmm, the 2 respective underdogs in the final four…..the matchup I want to see……
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>and yet, its last years runner up vs the 2015 champion…but its as close to underdogs as we’re getting\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>Both teams should just shake hands and congratulate each other one taking out the 1 and 2 seeds, and call it a draw. No final game gets played. (this goes in the article, haha)<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>glanzer would LOVE that.\u00a0\u00a0a championship game decided by a handshake\/hug like the ending of\u00a0lisa on ice<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>Classic Simpsons episode. I will let Chadwick know you referenced it, when I see him at trivia\u00a0tonight<\/span><\/span>.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Definitely as close to underdogs as we’re getting. There really is no true underdog to root for of the 4 remaining teams.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

ok, so, for real….lbs\/filthy…..<\/span>Is luke playing?\u00a0 And that guy avery i don’t know?<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>luke and ave will be ready to party.\u00a0 also don’t sleep on roberts in this one – first off, only emily gets to do that.\u00a0 also, while he’s\u00a0not a flashy player, that’s the type of guy you need in the playoffs – simple, effective north\/south game with strong two-way instincts.<\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>I forgot about Roberts.\u00a0\u00a0yeah he isnt flashy, but he is solid and tenacious.\u00a0 Lbs. do have some good young guys….<\/span><\/p>\n

let’s see….Filthy has the goaltending edge…..both teams have a lot of firepower….<\/p>\n

last one…and i cant even close it out…ha<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>doesn’t bode well for tricia<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>i think it would be a run and gun game on both sides, with a lot of fast breaks<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>if thats the case, it will come down to whose defense will hold (both teams’ best players are on O so that will be interesting).\u00a0\u00a0and if zisser can match up with tim k.<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>the neutral zone could get clogged, being that both teams have good centers who want give up much defensively….<\/span><\/p>\n

but if both teams can break through that, that’s when those fast breaks come<\/p>\n

unfortunately, i fear for your sake that Zisser may not be able to match Tim K<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>so you think in a lbs\/filthy matchup, filthy win on the back of tim k?<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>not necessarily….I am just not sure if James will be as effective without Suvin. However, James can do A LOT himself<\/p>\n

Also Sunny and Shaq should never be overlooked, of course.<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>might come down to the ladies.\u00a0\u00a0ann, kate et al vs ali, klion, liz et al<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>Tim K may have to shoulder a lot of the burden, BUT Filthy will get their scoring chances, too.<\/p>\n

I believe Filthy only have 3 girls on their roster.\u00a0\u00a0Hopefully all 3 show up\u00a0Sunday<\/span><\/span><\/span>.<\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>hopefully theres no rain\u00a0sunday<\/span><\/span><\/span>\u00a0or we’re all screwed<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>Prediction: Filthy jump out to an early lead, but Lbs. ultimately crush their hopes…..3-2 Lbs. (unless Dennis and Suvin play. Ha.)<\/p>\n

Arya:<\/b>\u00a0ok two more questions before we mercifully bring this to a close<\/p>\n

1) would an 8 seed winning the championship be the lowest in league history?\u00a0 and 2) has a championship game ended in sudden death before?<\/p>\n

or do we need to call glanzer in for these<\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>Gotta call him in.<\/p>\n

the 8 seed winning is prob true….though it’s crazy because Lbs. are SUCH a GOOD 8 seed<\/span><\/p>\n

SULTAN FACT CHECK: “<\/i><\/b>Not only are the Lbs.not good but…I kinda remember an\u00a08th seed winning once before<\/a>“<\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

JW:\u00a0<\/b>In my time I do not believe a championship has ended in OT.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

SULTAN FACT CHECK: “<\/b>Wrong, you stupid idiot (dummy). FK beat the Hookers in OT in 2014. And you know this. (Ariel scored and a week later he also scored the OT goal for Dependable Scrap. Both wins pale in comparison to his Cecil & Harambe World Championship)”<\/i>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Arya:\u00a0<\/b>well at least we can agree on one thing: no matter what happens this weekend, rich and hicks will insist that fuzz won the championship<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

SULTAN FACT CHECK: “<\/i><\/b>I know we lost. Ellery and Fatou put a Washington Caps Curse<\/a> on Fuzz and now we can never get past the 2nd round!”<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by Arya Stark and JW So at this point, unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’re probably aware that the semis and championship will be taking place on the same day.\u00a0\u00a0Previews for the semifinals\u00a0were posted before the rain fears but to get you through the championship without actually going through the effort of writing […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6355,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15940","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-league-info"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15940"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/6355"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15940"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15940\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15950,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15940\/revisions\/15950"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15940"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15940"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15940"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}