{"id":257,"date":"2008-05-06T20:59:18","date_gmt":"2008-05-07T01:59:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/?p=257"},"modified":"2008-05-06T22:19:41","modified_gmt":"2008-05-07T03:19:41","slug":"week-4-news-and-notes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/week-4-news-and-notes\/","title":{"rendered":"Week 4 News and Notes"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00bfD\u00f3nde Est\u00e1 Mi Zapato?<\/h4>\n

<\/a><\/p>\n

\"Cinco<\/a><\/div>\n

Mexican Standoff Finally Lets Loose<\/strong>
\nAs a dry<\/span> practice run\u00a0for the upcoming courtside party on June 1 (which\u00a0Jefferson Hendricks is really<\/em> working hard on), Mexican Standoff threw an open\u00a0Cinco De Mayo Party on Sunday.\u00a0 Festivities included a “Mustache vs. Non-Mustache” intra-team scrimmage, a chips and salsa station, and a pi\u00f1ata.\u00a0 The action climaxed when Mexican Standoff finally broke open the pi\u00f1ata, splattering candy across the court.\u00a0 However, Trevor “White Jesus” Tyrrell materialized in the nick of time\u00a0to save the candy from reaching any playing areas.\u00a0 Although the party was a smashing success, there was one casualty:\u00a0Hendricks’s sneaker.\u00a0 With one half of his playing footwear dangling precariously from a tree, he was forced to play his game with one sneaker and one boot.\u00a0 Since Hendricks\u00a0scored a goal, maybe he should consider playing this way more often.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

\"COOP!\"<\/a><\/p>\n

He’s Also the Fastest Leaf Blower in the West<\/strong>
\n2007 Brendan “Flounder” Hay Memorial Award winner Alex “Coop” Eben Meyer once again demonstrated why the media bestowed upon him such a great honor.\u00a0 Coop arrived thirty minutes before the start of the 3:00 games to ensure that the court surface was pristine.\u00a0 Sporting a Philadelphia Flyers jersey, Coop spent a good twenty minutes blowing tree residue off of the Corlears blacktop.\u00a0 Some say between the jersey and leaf blower, Coop eerily resembled Ron Hextall.<\/p>\n

\"Pizza<\/a><\/p>\n

Still More From $howT!m3<\/strong>
\n“The green light in F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby<\/em> represents Gatsby\u2019s hopes and dreams for the future.\u00a0 However,\u00a0much as Gatsby associates\u00a0the light\u00a0with Daisy, and because Gatsby\u2019s quest for Daisy is broadly associated with the American dream, the green light also symbolizes this more generalized ideal.\u00a0 In fact, in Chapter IX, Nick even compares the green light to how America, rising out of the ocean, must have looked to early settlers of the new nation.\u00a0 It is in this regard that The Great Gatsby<\/em><\/span> can be viewed as\u00a0a highly symbolic\u00a0commentary on 1920<\/span>s America as a whole, in particular the disintegration of the American dream in an era of unprecedented prosperity and material excess.” — Hector “$howT!m3” Melendez, regarding the Rehabs victory against Fresh Kills<\/p>\n

Tomfoolery<\/strong>
\nFilthy Gorgeous has a new cheer.\u00a0 It goes like this…”1…2…3…Let’s do this bitch!”\u00a0 Yes, it’s that slow of a news week.<\/p>\n

Captains’ Commendations<\/strong><\/p>\n

Bad Touch<\/strong>: Mark Anderson<\/em> had six “near goals” due to a ferocious running effort.
\nCorlears Hookers<\/strong>: Peter “Purple Rain” Putka<\/em> sacrificed his body for the team, and his absence in the second half was a difference maker.
\nDark Rainbows<\/strong>: Rory Tischler<\/em> played well in his first game.
\nDenim Demons<\/strong>: Gabby Carson<\/em> delayed taking her sister to the airport so she could participate in the shootout.
\nFilthy Gorgeous<\/strong>: Becky Antar<\/em> showcased tremendous defensive prowess, and Dan Owens<\/em> came directly from the five borough bike race.
\nGouging Anklebiters<\/strong>: According to Phil “Sandy” Donohue, “‘Old School’ Mike Ross<\/em> shut bitches down like the Great Wall of China”.\u00a0 He was also rumored to have kept the Mongols from annexing goalie “Quiet” Mike O’Connor.
\nHappy Little Elves<\/strong>: Alyssa Schwartz<\/em> designed a “kick-ass” logo for their new uniforms.
\nMathematics<\/strong>: Sharif “The Chocolate Buzzsaw” Corinaldi<\/em> managed to keep his shirt on for almost the entire game.
\nMexican Standoff<\/strong>: Len Guinto<\/em> celebrated his birthday with a shootout goal.
\nMighty Squirrels<\/strong>: Jason “Cheek” Cheek<\/em> and Tim “(S)crappy” Gray<\/em> got engaged (not to each other).
\nRehabs<\/strong>: Alex “Villano VI” Zabala<\/em>.\u00a0 “Kid’s an animal.” — Bryan “Stork” Welch
\nSky Fighters<\/strong>: Chris Shumaker<\/em> sweat the most, which thoroughly impressed Amy Lott.
\nTuques<\/strong>: Alfred Liu<\/em> was suggested by the media and confirmed by Dave as\u00a0instrumental in setting up goals.
\nWhat The Puck<\/strong>: Quoth the Mad Dog: “Darrell<\/em> [“Accurate Bob” Hartman<\/em>] went the distance for sure…played awesome!”\u00a0 For those unaware, Mad Dog has been attending the $howT!m3 School of Quote-Making.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00bfD\u00f3nde Est\u00e1 Mi Zapato? Mexican Standoff Finally Lets Loose As a dry practice run\u00a0for the upcoming courtside party on June 1 (which\u00a0Jefferson Hendricks is really working hard on), Mexican Standoff threw an open\u00a0Cinco De Mayo Party on Sunday.\u00a0 Festivities included a “Mustache vs. Non-Mustache” intra-team scrimmage, a chips and salsa station, and a pi\u00f1ata.\u00a0 The […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[10,61,24,42],"class_list":["post-257","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-league-notes","tag-2008-season","tag-coop","tag-mexican-standoff","tag-news-and-notes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/257"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=257"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/257\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=257"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=257"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=257"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}