![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/05\/amyeats.jpg\" "\\"Amy")
<\/a><\/p>\nInspired by the success of the Denim Demons’ Family Day in 2009, this past Sunday marked the first ever league-wide\u00a0Family Day.\u00a0 League manager Adriano “Muscles Marinara” Bratta encouraged all league members to invite their families and friends, and also to prepare a cherished food item.<\/p>\n
Although the event was met with mild success, there were still several league members who participated.\u00a0 Amy Kovner of the Gouging Anklebiters brought chocolate-covered strawberries<\/a> (STRAWBERRIES? AAAHHH!!!) and her husband, Mr. Kovner (Todd).\u00a0 Anklebiters captain Phil “Sandy” Donohue shared cupcakes from Sugar Sweet Sunshine bakery, which thankfully did not find their way into any of Minkus’ crevices.\u00a0 Jason Eitel of the Corlears Hookers forced his\u00a0girlfriend to cook homemade empenadas with salsa, which\u00a0he then\u00a0noted were made by a real Colombian (unlike Eitel, who is neither Colombian nor Canadian).\u00a0 Bratta’s mother even made a brief cameo to serve her world famous tiramisu.<\/p>\n Mike\u00a0Sokolyansky of Fresh Kills\u00a0brought his brother Dave, who scored a goal, but did not cook.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n Written by Fashion Correspondent Abigail Meisterman<\/em><\/p>\n “People change, hairstyles change, interest rates fluctuate.”<\/em> – Hillary Flammond, Top Secret<\/a><\/p>\n In concurrence with the unemployment rate, BTSH’s numbers have swelled. This is not to say there is any causation or correlation (although people on funemployment may find hockey as a good way to take out their jobless frustrations), just that each has gotten larger. Since a cap on active rosters has been put in place, new teams have formed so that all may play. And with new teams, as well as old, come new jerseys.<\/p>\n This week, let’s look at Poutine Machine, a brand new team filled with old players — old as in veteran, not age. Of course,\u00a0I’m assuming that, since captain Patrick “Sven”\u00a0Larsen preferred not to disclose the birth dates, social security numbers, and bank pins of his players. In a short e-mail conversation with Larsen, I gleaned the name source of the MacNeil Division’s tribute to Quebec’s Nordiques. On a romantic getaway to Ottawa, Larsen and his fianc\u00e9e, Filthy Gorgeous captain Monica Russo, were looking for some afternoon delight<\/a> and came upon a shack<\/a>\u00a0that served up the Canadian delight<\/a> (which is very, very different\u00a0from Turkish Delight<\/a>). They say imitation is the highest form of flattery, so Macdonald must be pretty high. The shirts are very well done and anyone who has any knowledge of hockey\/NHL pre-1995 (which I don’t, except for what I learned while writing this) will no doubt rejoice in their Nordiques tribute. What do I think? Well, I just hope that the blue brings out Marcus Bonnee’s eyes.<\/p>\n * All things Canada? Does this mean they love the Crash Test Dummies who have a new album out next week?<\/p>\n After another successful American Cancer Society tournament, “Con” Ed Lau wishes to thank\u00a0everyone\u00a0who supported the cause.\u00a0 This includes\u00a0those who helped to run and organize the event, as well as those who donated and played.\u00a0 More than $4,200 was raised this year, which is the best single year total in tournament history.\u00a0 Ed is looking forward to running the\u00a0event again next year.<\/p>\n Name:<\/strong> Chadwick Who Can Resist The Allure Of Family Day? Inspired by the success of the Denim Demons’ Family Day in 2009, this past Sunday marked the first ever league-wide\u00a0Family Day.\u00a0 League manager Adriano “Muscles Marinara” Bratta encouraged all league members to invite their families and friends, and also to prepare a cherished food item. Although the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[132,39,21,30,42,137],"class_list":["post-2763","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-league-notes","tag-2010-season","tag-acs-tournament","tag-gouging-anklebiters","tag-happy-little-elves","tag-news-and-notes","tag-poutine-machine"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2763"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2763"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2763\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3775,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2763\/revisions\/3775"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2763"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2763"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2763"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Dirty Laundry<\/h4>\n
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\n\u00a0
\nFrom there, it was just a matter of brainstorming with Canadian, graphic designer, and team member (triple threat!) Kevin Macdonald to find a logo that would express PM’s love of all things Canadian*, which according to Larsen is really just poutine and hockey. I would like to submit the following for further consideration to receive love: Canadian Sex Acts<\/a>\u00a0(no pics, only text).<\/p>\nA Special Thank You From “Con” Ed Lau<\/h4>\n
Know Your Neighbor<\/h4>\n
<\/a><\/p>\n
\nTeam:<\/strong> Happy Little Elves
\nNickname:<\/strong> The Chairman
\nReason For Nickname:<\/strong> This picture<\/a> of him holding a chair
\nRejected Nicknames:<\/strong>\u00a0The Professor, Hockey Bitch, Chad-Trick
\nOrigin:<\/strong> Washington, DC
\nCollege:<\/strong> University of North America
\nEarly Aspirations:<\/strong> To headline a Friday Night Live<\/a> concert on the Town Green with his band The Hanging Chads
\nFirst\u00a0Job:<\/strong> Mascot for Green Giant
\nCurrent Job:<\/strong> Financial Something Or Other
\nHero:<\/strong> Alex Ovechkin
\nReason to Love Him:<\/strong> Without his assistance, your humble correspondents would not be able to use bullet\u00a0points on this website.
\nReason to Hate Him:<\/strong>\u00a0The Elves’ Personnel Purge of ’09
\nFast Fact:\u00a0<\/strong>Chadwick’s “Eggs Benedict” came in second place in his hometown’s annual Taste of the Town in 1995.\u00a0 The winner was future Mathematic Justin Perras of Vienna, VA\u00a0for his homemade jambalaya.
\nFavorite Things:<\/strong>\u00a0Rich Glanzer,\u00a0the Elves’ blackout jersey, the Washington Capitals, viscous prose
\nFavorite BTSH Traveling Trophy:<\/strong>\u00a0The Barnacle Bowl
\nLeast Favorite Things:\u00a0<\/strong>Rich Glanzer<\/a>, Henrik Lundqvist, Dulles International Airport, brevity
\nBest Known For:<\/strong>\u00a0Looking down on everyone else
\nThings the Media Will Continue to Overhype about Him:\u00a0<\/strong>With Rich Glanzer handling the Elves’ personnel decisions, Chadwick is no more than a figurehead captain.
\nHockey Comparison: <\/strong>Zdeno Chara
\n<\/a>Non-Hockey Comparison:<\/strong>\u00a0The Queen of England
\nDown the Road: <\/strong>Upon retirement from BTSH, Chadwick attempts to write the great American novel.\u00a0 However, his book publisher passes on his weighty and\u00a0pedantic treatise, opting instead for a children’s book written by 999 monkeys and one\u00a0Eric “El Guapo” DiPierri\u00a0at 1,000 typewriters.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"