![\"Stork's](\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/06\/tomcats.jpg\" "\\"Stork's")
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What The Puck (6-0) vs. Rehabs (3-1-1) <\/p>\n Gouging Anklebiters (0-6) vs. Tuques (1-5) Mexican Standoff (1-4-1) vs. Corlears Hookers (4-1) Dark Rainbows (5-1) vs. Happy Little Elves (1-4-1) LBS (4-2) vs. Mathematics (2-4) Filthy Gorgeous (3-2) vs. Denim Demons (5-0-1) Mighty Squirrels (4-0-2) vs. Sky Fighters (3-2) Cobra Kai (2-3-1) vs. Bad Touch (0-5-1) Fresh Kills (1-4-0-1) vs. Unicorns (3-3) Women’s All-Star Game: Tris vs. Delts The DELTS will wear blue\/dark, and will made up women from these following teams: In addition to Peaches’s (potentially) First Annual BTSH Tricycle Race, the All-Star game will feature its own shenanigans and hijinx.\u00a0 Each half will commence\u00a0“Multiball” style, with six balls\u00a0dumped on to the court at once.\u00a0\u00a0The game will continue\u00a0without interruption until\u00a0all six balls land in a net.\u00a0 Balls that go out of bounds can be thrown back on the court by spectators (though hopefully not at the women…that means you, Sharif).<\/p>\n At the end of the game, the losing team will have a\u00a0the chance to even the score through a blindfolded\u00a0shootout.\u00a0 Both the shooter\u00a0and goalie will be blindfolded, and spectators are encouraged to shout directions.<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Corlears South, 3:00 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> What The Puck leads 7-4
\nGame Notes:<\/strong> This matchup features two of the hottest teams in BTSH, as What The Puck has won all six of their games, and the Rehabs are currently riding a three game winning streak.\u00a0 Despite their gaudy record, What The Puck has struggled in one area: attendance.\u00a0 They have had only one substitute the last two weeks and actually played shorthanded in one of those games.\u00a0 Personnel issues aside, their lethal offense\u00a0still leads the league in team goals.\u00a0 The Rehabs started slowly, but played their best game of the season last\u00a0week in a 6-0 victory against the Happy Little Elves.\u00a0 Their deep offensive rotation is\u00a0led by the Ontario Connection of “Con” Ed Lau and Jon “Dinner Plate” Feldman, but not to be overlooked are Sal Malguarnera, Lateef Nurmohamed, Chantel Arroyo, and Brian Wong (who really enjoys playing hockey).
\nKeys to the Game:<\/strong>
\n1. What The Puck team cancer, Ant “Father Time” Ventolieri has frequently been seen wearing a Rehabs shirt.\u00a0 One has to wonder where his true loyalties lie.\u00a0 The answer is most likely with himself.
\n2. Cinemax is scheduled to play Tomcats<\/em> from 1:00 AM to 3:00 AM on Sunday morning.\u00a0 Rehabs captain Bryan “Stork” Welch will not be able to resist watching this and could be tired\u00a0and unfocused.
\n3. Lost amongst the accolades for What The Puck’s explosive offense, has been the steady goaltending of Roderick “Guy LeDouche” Cruz.\u00a0 He has yet to give up more than two goals in a game.
\nEli\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Rehabs.\u00a0 What The Puck’s attendance issues finally catch up with them.
\nDerek\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> What The Puck.\u00a0 They’ve played nearly perfectly each and every week, regardless of how many of them\u00a0show up.<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Moffo, 2:30 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> Gouging Anklebiters lead 10-2
\nGame Notes:<\/strong> With a combined 1-11 record, these two teams\u00a0are itching for a victory.\u00a0 Expect both teams to play with a little extra vigor in this one.
\nEli\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Gouging Anklebiters.\u00a0 Eric “El Guapo” DiPierri and I have the same number of goals.\u00a0 That’s\u00a0not a good thing for Eric.
\nDerek\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Gouging Anklebiters.\u00a0 My only concern is whether ‘Biters captain Phil “Sandy” Donohue can rally the troops together for the earlier start time.<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Corlears North, 3:00 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> Corlears Hookers lead 1-0
\nGame Notes:<\/strong> Since they are hosting the courtside barbeque and party, Mexican Standoff’s focus might be diverted.
\nEli\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Corlears Hookers
\nDerek\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Corlears Hookers<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Moffo, 3:30 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> First Meeting
\nGame Notes: <\/strong>This game represents the first matchup in the battle for the\u00a0prestigious Fairy Tale Cup.\u00a0 The coveted (and imaginary) trophy will be awarded to the winner of the triangular series among\u00a0the Dark Rainbows, Happy Little Elves, and Unicorns.
\nEli\u2019s Pick: <\/strong>Dark Rainbows.\u00a0 Captain Sean Reynolds really wants to maintain possession of the Fairy Tale Cup.
\nDerek\u2019s Pick: <\/strong>Dark Rainbows<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Corlears North, 4:00 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> Tied 1-1
\nGame Notes:<\/strong> The Mathematics consider it an honor to play on the same court as Ken “The Alpha Male” Poulin.<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Corlears South, 4:00 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> Denim Demons lead 2-0
\nGame Notes:<\/strong> Although the Denim Demons have an apparent edge in this game based on record, Filthy Gorgeous currently boasts a three game winning streak.\u00a0 A win by Filthy Gorgeous would be\u00a0a bold statement and also propel them into the upper echelon of the standings.
\nEli\u2019s Pick: <\/strong>Filthy Gorgeous
\nDerek\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Denim Demons.\u00a0 With crowds gathering for the courtside party, the Fightin’ Rubens will feed off of their energy.<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Moffo, 4:30 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> Mighty Squirrels lead 3-0
\nGame Notes:<\/strong> The outcome of this game is completely dependent on whether Mighty Squirrels star player, Tim “(S)crappy” Gray can recover from his back injury.\u00a0 If he can, the Squirrels might be in trouble.
\nEli\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Mighty Squirrels.\u00a0 (S)crappy healthy?\u00a0 “Oh, puh-leese!”
\nDerek\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Mighty Squirrels<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Corlears North, 5:00 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> Cobra Kai leads 2-0
\nGame Notes:<\/strong> Sunday is Cobra Kai captain Peter Oblamski’s birthday.\u00a0 Inside sources report that several of his teammates have already\u00a0selected gifts for him:\u00a0Enayet “Retail” Rasul plans on giving a $25 gift certificate to Best Buy, Adriano Bratta has cooked some of his famous homemade marinara sauce, and Christina “Mojito” Verigan will offer him three free fencing lessons.
\nEli\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Cobra Kai.\u00a0 The best gift of all would be getting to .500 in June, which Cobra Kai has never done before.
\nDerek\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Cobra Kai<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Corlears South, 5:00 PM
\nAll-Time Series:<\/strong> Unicorns lead 4-3-1
\nGame Notes:<\/strong> These two teams last met in the 2007 playoff quarterfinals, where Fresh Kills sent the Unicorns packing in the sixth round of a shootout.\u00a0 A similar result on Sunday would end Fresh Kills’ four game losing streak.
\nEli\u2019s Pick:<\/strong> Unicorns
\nDerek\u2019s Pick: <\/strong>Tie.\u00a0 Yeah, that’s right, I predicted a tie.\u00a0 Big whoop.\u00a0 Wanna fight about it?<\/p>\n
\nLocation:<\/strong> Corlears North, 6:00 PM
\nGame Notes<\/strong>: This year’s Women’s All-Star Game will feature the TRIS versus the DELTS.\u00a0 The TRIS will wear white, and will be made up of women from the following teams:
\nCorlears Hookers
\nMathematics
\nDark Rainbows
\nMexican Standoff
\nFresh Kills
\nLBS
\nBad Touch
\nHappy Little Elves
\nFilthy Gorgeous<\/p>\n
\nWhat The Puck
\nUnicorns
\nRehabs
\nSky Fighters
\nMighty Squirrels
\nDenim Demons
\nCobra Kai
\nTuques
\nGouging Anklebiters<\/p>\n