The Happy Little Elves stunned BTSH in 2010 by winning the championship in only their third year of existence.\u00a0 After allowing the second most goals in the regular season, the Elves clamped down defensively in the playoffs, holding their opponents to an average of two goals per game. Brunette rookie Ryan Nakahara proved he is as clutch as captain Rich Glanzer claims he is with four goals in the playoffs, including two in the championship game.<\/p>\n
However, Glanzer and the Happy Little Elves still view last season as a complete and utter failure, despite their other accomplishment of maintaining control of the Barnacle Bowl for another year.\u00a0 For the third consecutive season, they were unable to procure the one trophy they really want, the prestigious (yet imaginary) Fairy Tale Cup.\u00a0 Glanzer comments:<\/p>\n
Once again, we got screwed. In 2009, all teams went 1-1, and we had the greatest goal differential. But it wasn’t good enough for Derek and Eli. And then in 2010, the Rainbows used an illegal goalie to beat us. But it wasn’t just an illegal goalie, it was Craig from the Unicorns!! And while some people will say we used an illegal goalie in Mike O’Connor during that same game, those people are jerks. A protest has been filed to League Do-Nothing Commissioner Adriano Bratta. And when he awards us that victory, we will be the 2010 Fairy Tale Cup champions. Of course, that will change the playoff seeding and the 2010 playoffs will have to be replayed, but nobody remembers who won that anyway. It’s all about the prestigious (yet imaginary) Fairy Tale Cup dammit!! And I guarantee you this, we have declared Fargin War on Derek and Eli, as well as Craig and Josh Wilson, and anyone else who screws us out of our destiny.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
The Happy Little Elves will begin their quest for the Fairy Tale Cup against the Unicorns on June 12.\u00a0 They will face the Dark Rainbows, whom they have never beaten, on June 26.\u00a0 Both of these will be road games for the Elves.<\/p>\n
Entity They Resemble, According to Rich Glanzer:<\/strong> Jack Bauer<\/em>. Jack normally gets his way in the end, though not everyone, even on his own team at CTU thinks Jack\u2019s ways are justified. Jack has tortured many a terrorist, and there are about 16 Little Elves that would be very happy if they could torture their game captain, Hockey Rich. The Elves have never finished over .500 and their record will probably be right around that this season. But come playoff time, Jack and the Elves are contenders.
\nFast Fact:<\/strong> Ben Chadwick has discovered a way to make Rich Glanzer 50% louder.<\/p>\nROSTER<\/strong>
\nChris Adrahtas
\nTrevor Beauclair
\nKristen Brodgessel
\nMelissa Budnick
\nGarrett \u201cAx\u201d Carrino
\n“The Chairman” Ben Chadwick (C)
\nJenna Cruff
\nShaun deLacy
\nEric \u201cEl Guapo\u201d DiPierri
\nRich Glanzer (A)
\nRob \u201cSmash\u201d Muggeo
\nRyan Nakahara
\nMelanie Pessin
\nJerome \u201cHornswoggle\u201d Ramos
\nShoshana Rudnick
\nSarah \u201cT-Bone\u201d Torneten
\nGil Valdez
\nThe Great Gazoo
\nUncle NEDI<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"This Is Why The Elves Can’t Have Nice Things Color: Electric Lime Year Founded: 2008 2010 Regular Season Finish: 8-5-0-3 (3rd, Hackett Division; 8th overall) 2010 Playoff Result: Defeated Corlears Hookers in championship game Conference: Weyersberg Division: Rubens 2010 Leading Scorer: Trevor Beauclair, 17 goals Team Song: Zack Ryder’s theme music Key Additions: None Key […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[154],"tags":[153,30,18],"class_list":["post-3811","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-2011-team-previews","tag-2011-season","tag-happy-little-elves","tag-team-previews"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3811"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3811"}],"version-history":[{"count":18,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3811\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5158,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3811\/revisions\/5158"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3811"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3811"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3811"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
![\"\"](\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/03\/ElvesPreview.jpg\" "\\"Chadwick\\"")
<\/a><\/p>\n