{"id":4220,"date":"2011-04-25T22:26:05","date_gmt":"2011-04-26T02:26:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/?p=4220"},"modified":"2011-04-25T22:26:05","modified_gmt":"2011-04-26T02:26:05","slug":"guest-columnist-rich-glanzer-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/guest-columnist-rich-glanzer-3\/","title":{"rendered":"Guest Columnist: Rich Glanzer"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>The following views do not necessarily represent those of the editors or of BTSH. They do, however, represent those of Rich Glanzer.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft\" style=\"margin-left: 3px; margin-right: 10px;\" src=\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/GlanzerColumn.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"179\" \/>For winning the Survivor Pool for the second straight year [<em>Ed: Factual inaccuracy #1<\/em>], I get to make yet another guest column.  Here it is:<\/p>\n<p>This is the true story [<em>Ed: Factual inaccuracy #2<\/em>], of two strangers, picked to run a co-ed hockey team, work together, and get their asses kicked. Find out what happens when captains stop being polite, and start getting real.  The real story of the Happy Little Elves.<\/p>\n<p>In 2008, the Happy Little Elves were formed.  Two men, one loved, and the other me, fought for control of the franchise.  The tall one they call Ben Chadwick eventually won the power struggle (because he paid Bob W. the league fee, and I didn&#8217;t), and that is how the Happy Little Elves came into existence.  Years later, many books, movies, and inaccurate stories on the BTSH website [<em>Ed: Including this very guest column<\/em>] detailed how the Elves went from Lime Green Losers to champions of the BTSH world.  But finally the secret tapes came out as I knew they would, and the true story has finally been revealed.<\/p>\n<p>How did I know the tapes would come out???\u00a0 [<em>Ed: Two of these question marks are superfluous<\/em>] Well, I leaked it on my Facebook account a few months ago.  But here are the secret conversations between Ben Chadwick and myself.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PmF42fFSnLc\" target=\"_blank\">http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=PmF42fFSnLc<\/a><\/p>\n<p>As you can see, the friction between the 2009 Duo of the Year, Ben Chadwick and myself, has not thawed.  We hate each other as much as we did the first day when I said to him, &#8220;Hi, my name is Rich Glanzer, but you can call me Captain.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>However, we both agree on three things:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><em>The Simpsons<\/em> is way better than <em>Family Guy<\/em><\/li>\n<li>Jan Erixon would still be the best Ranger<\/li>\n<li>Shaun deLacey [<em>sic<\/em>] is a jerk, but he&#8217;s our jerk<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The following views do not necessarily represent those of the editors or of BTSH. They do, however, represent those of Rich Glanzer. For winning the Survivor Pool for the second straight year [Ed: Factual inaccuracy #1], I get to make yet another guest column. Here it is: This is the true story [Ed: Factual inaccuracy [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[153,86,30,103],"class_list":["post-4220","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general-interest","tag-2011-season","tag-guest-column","tag-happy-little-elves","tag-hockey-rich"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4220"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4220"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4220\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4224,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4220\/revisions\/4224"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4220"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4220"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.miyagimedia.com\/bruise\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4220"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}