![](\"http:\/\/www.btsh.org\/bruise\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/03\/winning.png\")
<\/a>No charities here. Win at the courts, Ace Bar and Skee*T*Ball<\/p><\/div>And here\u2019s the deal. If we mention your name, there is a good chance we are going to poke a little fun at you in a light-hearted way. Unless you’re Alex Eben Meyer, because I just don\u2019t like that guy…though he is a somewhat capable ref in one of the lower divisions. The point is, if something we say offends you, we won’t say it anymore. We want you to like when we write about you. That being said, Derk, Elly and I think most of you are assholes.<\/p>\n
<\/a>We think most of you are assholes, but not this kid. He seems kinda cool. I like his style.<\/p><\/div>\n
Speaking of assholes, lets get to the first GOTW for 2014! Congratulations Tuques and Anklebiters. The Tuques “won the off-season,” so they get the first GOTW.<\/p>\n
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<\/a>That’s a really nice blue shirt.<\/p><\/div>\n
GOTW: Tuques at Anklebiters<\/h4>\n
Keys for the Tuques:<\/strong> Meshing Very Well<\/p><\/div>\n Keys for the Anklebiters: I know…I know…none of you hipsters know anything about baseball except there are like 5 people that weirdly like the Pirates in BTSH. Prediction:<\/strong> Gremmies vs. Poutine<\/strong> Cobra Kai at Sky Fighters<\/strong>
Chemistry. For the past couple of years, the Tuques’ top players could hang and usually exceed the other teams’ top line, but their depth was lacking. This year, Denis and Shaq added BTSH stalwarts Bloom, Jenna and Creamy. The Tuques also added some other players that I\u2019ve never heard of but have to assume they are good. How will this new team mesh? Only time will tell. Actually, much like time, I\u2019ll also tell. Well. They will mesh very well.<\/p>\n<\/a>
<\/em><\/strong>Will Craig find his stick? Last time we saw Craig and Creamy together was during the shootout in the playoffs between the Butchers and Anklebiters. Creamy deked left, deked right, then went backwards (which you\u2019re not allowed to do in shootouts), then went forward, then went backwards (still not allowed to do) and finally scored off a befuddled Craig. While 50 people were chanting, \u201cNo goal, no goal\u201d from the sideline, the two refs (who I will not name but one is Worky, and the other is Adela) allowed the goal to stand. After the 2nd<\/sup> goal was scored, Craig hurled his stick, and much like Orosco’s glove in 86\u2026it has yet to come down. So if Craig doesn’t find his stick (it should be by the heckle wall since that’s where it landed), it maybe a long game for the Anklebiters.<\/p>\n<\/a>
But suck it, the Mets owned this town in 86 and will again in 2015!<\/p><\/div>\n
The Anklebiters seem to be one year behind the Tuques. Much like the Tuques of previous seasons, the Anklebiters have a few really talented players and the rest are scrappers. Their girls are better than most, but not superstars. I see the Tuques coming out really strong, taking a two goal lead pretty early and head to Ace with a 4-1 Opening Day victory.
Eli’s Pick:<\/em> La Famiglia 2, Gouging Anklebiters 1
Derek’s Pick:<\/em> La Famiglia 4, Gouging Anklebiters 2<\/p>\nOther Games<\/h4>\n
This is like when the NHL starts the season in\u00a0Czechoslovakia…not a lot of people in this country are going to watch it. Expect the Gremmies to pull off a 2-1 victory.
Eli’s Pick:<\/em> Gremlins 2, Poutine Machine 0
Derek’s Pick:<\/em> Gremlins 4, Poutine Machine 1<\/p>\n
CK is still trying to find its place in the league. Is Peter Lang still their goalie? Remember when he died after the Rehabs scored on him?\u00a0<\/p>\n