3 Stars of Week 7
by Glnzr
I like to do themes in my 3 Stars. Cats themes are the first 3 people to email her get 3rd, 2nd and 1st Star. Makes you wonder about her relationship with that train conductor, but I digress.
Today’s theme is perfection. As Rob Walsh and the rest of you surely know, the 1972 Dolphins are the only team to win the Super Bowl and go undefeated. Other teams have entered the discussion, but running back Mercury Morris doesn’t want to hear it.
“Like I said, don’t call me when you’re in my town; call me when you’re on my block and I see you next door moving your furniture in. And trust me, Poutine and Cobra Kai aint moving in no furniture.”
So if Head Coach Don Shula will allow it, here are this week’s 3 Stars!
Third Star: Don Shula/Karma/Filthier
Poutine and Cobra Kai were perfect going into this week. Both teams started feeling their oats as Russ gave himself all the stars last week, which led to Hicks making the same joke a world record 23 times. Meanwhile, a Poutine Superstar and Matt Russo flipped the bird to a bar named Karma. So it was going to be a big week as Poutine played Karma, and Cobra Kai played Filthier.
Much like every other NFL team, no one could compare to the 72 Dolphins, as Tim K. shut out Cobra Kai, and Karma shut up Poutine as they hung on to defeat them 2-1. Somewhere down in the depths of hell, Don Shula and Satan are drinking momessos as they laugh watching Sig, LJ, Campbell, Russ, Sully, Jack, and Russo cry…over what could have been.
Second Star: Cam the Free Agent Goalie
Fuzz believes in only playing HOF goalies, as Tim Brown and Coach are rostered, and Dave gil de Rubio is their 3rd string. But they must have been out to Cooperstown, celebrating Willie Stargell and the 1979 Pittsburgh Pirates (Coach and Tim are Pirate fans). So Fuzz had to call in Cam. Mistake after mistake by one particular defense, was met with no harm, as Cam stopped several point blank shots.
And to the four other BTSH goalies who had shutouts, your captains are terrible. They didn’t email us to tell us about you. Fuzz captain did. Hero
(I couldn’t find a picture of Cam but also didn’t try. This is better anyways)
First Star: Hicks
While Poutine and Cobra Kai failed us all, Brian Hicks hasn’t. Hicks took over for Super Spreader Sena as the Rehabs captain, and much like those pesky 72 Dolphins, Hicks beat the Gremlins 5-2 and is now perfect as a BTSH captain. Trivia Question. Who is the only other BTSH player (that I know of) to have a perfect record as BTSH Captain? Scroll to the next line for the answer!Answer: Our very own BTSH HOFer Elly! He captained the Happy Little Elves to a victory over the Dark Rainbows, ensuring the Elves held on to the Prestigious, yet Imaginary Fairy Tale Cup.
Participation Trophies: None. Danillo allegedly scored a beautiful shootout goal but I haven’t seen the video. But check out the scores. This may have been one of the lowest scoring weeks in league history, as 13 of the 18 teams scored 2 goals or less, and 5 were shutout.