Archive for the ‘league info’ Category
2019: Week 8 Box Scores – Scoring Highlights
Wednesday, June 12th, 2019Week 8 brought us interdivisional play that featured multiple OT victories, shutouts, and blowouts (not including what they called game 6 of the Stanley cup finals)….on to the box scores.
GANK 5 @ Rainbows 2
GANK – Ben “not Bob” Probert (5), Jared P (6), Shannon S (1), Jeremy Shoey/Schuie/ShoeShoe (2), Jason Bourne (3)
Goalie Win – Craiggers (4-1, GAA 1.00)
Dank Bows – Bryan L (2), Tarnado (2)
Goalie Loss – Greenwald (2-5)
DenDems 2 @ Hookers 3 F/SO
Demons – Jake R (2), Brian M (1)
Goalie SOL – Zak C (1-0-1, GAA 1.90)
Hookers – CJ (3), Eleni T (2)
Goalie Win – Dustin O #notyourallstargoalie2019 (5-0, GAA 0.77)
Shootout Winner – Danilo (and Not the Running Back Anderson with the clincher)
Evil Dojo 0 @ Mega Clutch Touch 2
Goalie Loss – Ryan M (0-2, GAA 3.00)
Mega – Eric D (1), Devin via FA
Goalie Shutout Win – Jeff H (1-0, 1 Shutout, GAA 0.00)
Game Notes: In what will sure be a top nomination for moment of saddening for 2019, Jeff shuts out Cobra Kai in his BTSH send-off game.
Advncd Anlytcs: CK’s replacement goalie for Campbell has a GAA higher than the most goals CK let in last year, not including the finals (not because Sig was in the crease on the third Fuzz goal, this is just to illustrate the punch line), which was only a brace (2) on many weeks in 2018. Is it time to go back to the Brooklyn ice hockey drawing board? Instagram polls? The dog park? Do they have those in Brooklyn? It does seem like a cliquey activity…
Rut Rot 2 @ Math 4
Gut Rot – Mark C (1), Tommy C (1)
Goalie Loss – Sam (0-5)
Math – Jack McG (4), Jon M x2 (5), Jeff S (2)
Goalie Win – David L (3-3, GAA 2.62)
Game Notes: I’m waiting one more week before censoring that goalie record. Oof. #RoadToMinus70
Rehabs 4 @ Gremlins 1
Habs – Dave R x2 (2), Mo R (2), Bryan M (2)
Goalie Win – Eric R (1-1, GAA 2.50)
Gremlins – Carcella “I might have had one too many” Molson(s) (1)
Goalie Loss – Sam “first and last” Goalie Game (0-1)
Game Notes: Rehabs are now recruiting Br/i/y/ans ad nausea. Bryan M has been credited with the opening goal against Rainbows in Week 6.
Instant Karma 1 @ Filthier 5
IK – Derek Zed (6)
Goalie Loss – Steve F (but totally down to give it to Sizzler and ruin his goalie stats since he subbed in late in this game in relief)
Filthier – Sunny M (5), Thomas W (2), OP James x2 (5), Sean the Mule (1)
Goalie Win – Tim K (5-1, GAA 1.48)
Fuzz 1 @ Poos 0 F/OT
Fuzz – Sig (4)
Goalie Shutout Win – Tim Bwn (3-2, GAA 1.37)
Goalie Loss – RJ F (2-2, GAA 1.95)
Game Notes: Nico did knock down Walsh. But I totally didn’t see it happen, while totally not reffing, and totally called it a penalty.
Advncd Anlytcs: Sig now has more goals than alleged knock downs. Goon!!!
DaPucks 3 @ Pounds 4
WTP – Paul P (2), Hanif P (1), Hoggystyle* (4)
Goalie Loss – Ed P (2-3-2, GAA 2.64)
Pounds – Jason B (3), B Wayne (3), Mike “obscure reference Allyn McCauley” McVillainy via WTP, Amitai via FA
Goalie Win – Sizzler (6-0, GAA 1.83)
Game Notes: *unassisted, kind of (McCauley will set me up in a future game I’m sure**)
Trade Block: **After only appearing for 1 game through Week 8, WTP are trying to ship off Capalbo to Poundtown, because ScottyKthe2nd likes saying [reverse] 69 more than the Hamilton/toe Provider. In return they’ll hopefully receive something more than TML box score references in Mike “spelt like Allyn” McCauley. Okay, this is now getting too long and I’m not putting together a yetter like presser article here.
Butchers 4 @ Riots 5 F/OT
Pig Knife O Fence – Jake T x2 (4), Cheeky (1), Super and Fast Dave (2)
Goalie OTLoss – Tim Brk (1-2, GAA 2.68)
Riots – Kevin Zed (1), Vanck (1), Margot (1), Dan G x2 (2)
Goalie Win – Dave GdR (2-3)
Game Notes: A lot of rioter red picked an ideal time to start scoring some goals – everyone who scored in this game had firsts on the season, with Dan’s second being the difference in OT. I totally told Jake they’d win a game this season. Oh no wait, that was me talking to Rob from Gut Rot….the box scores never lie.
FK 6 @ SKY 0
FK – Gabe x4 (5), Rachel (1), Sheena (1)
Goalie Shutout Win – Barch Pile (2-3, GAA 1.76)
Goalie Loss – Peter “White, Black and Red All Over” Parker via Spiderman Newspaper Photos
Game Notes: With Gabe only at 1 goal heading into Week 8 and some sky fighting horseshoe/poo luck from week 7’s game, mean reversion is a b*tch, Pete.
Three Stars of Week 8
Tuesday, June 11th, 2019
By Richieohero
Third Star
Happy Little Elves!!
The last two times the Elves played were not good. In 2015 Ben Chadwick eliminated what he loved most in life, by beating them 3-0 in the play-in game, and 3-0 in the overall Karma vs. Elves series. The Elves then disbanded and became the evil Fuzz. The Elves returned for one game against Gut Rot, and proceeded to do what they did best. Lose in humiliating fashion.
On Sunday Sarah T. and Chadwick proudly wore their Elves shirts in the ASG, and both scored a goal.* (*= I seriously doubt either scored a goal)
(more…)Around the League – Week 8
Sunday, June 9th, 2019
Dark Rainbows gave the Biters a run for their beer, but a late surge pushed the Biters to victory.
The Hookers rode the Demons for another impressive win. Keeping them in the race for the division crown.
Fresh Kills bounced back from last week’s hiccup by swatting aside those pesky Sky Fighters (who are a lot more talented than some writers are giving them credit for).
Zach and Math won the Couch Bowl over Diane and Gut Rot. Now that’s where he’ll be spending his nights for the foreseeable future.
Stupid Cobra Kai knocked Ryann out of Survivor Pool Part Deux by losing to Mega Touch. Great play in net Jeff!
Rehabs continued their dominance over the Jamie-less Gremlins. Welcome back Ramirez!
Steven and Instant Karma owned the first half against Filthier, but then Ann, James and Sunny did their thing. Sigh.
LBS came back against the Pucks to steal a win in regulation thanks to the defensive heroics of Hilldawg and Alex.
The Fuzz and Poutine brawl went extra innings with old man Walsh getting body slammed into the pavement by Nicorette, but Fuzz laughed last. Fun fact about Rich, he is the proud owner of a Ronkonkoma condo’s.
The Riots shocked the league by upending the heavily favored Butchers. Nice win today Dave GDR!
Week 8 Previews – Part 2
Friday, June 7th, 2019What the Puck at LBS, Inc.
By Tracy Demon
Such is the anticipation around this matchup that members of The Media were literally* fighting (*not at all literally) over who would write the preview. In one corner, we have the still undefeated LBS, and while you kind of want to hate them, many of them are nice people who engage in acts of charity like trying to teach me hockey and keeping Blink-182 relevant. In the other corner, we have the sometimes-defeated but always scrappy What the Puck, best known for having top-notch graphic design, at least two cute dogs that I know of, several players with cool hair, and also being nice and fun people goddamn it. Make no mistake: the niceness ends at puck drop, and the Pucks are gonna give this Div 1 team a fight.
Prediction: The Pucks win our hearts and minds, but victory stays in Poundtown this weekend, 4-2. Hoggy consoles himself by murdering another sandwich. Justin shakes it off and goes on to design the best Twin Dekes shirt the Ocean City tournament has ever seen.
(more…)Week 8 Previews – Part 1
Thursday, June 6th, 2019Gouging Anklebiters at Dark Rainbows
The Anklebiters and Dark Rainbows are kicking off All-Sunday in pure BTSH fashion. They have an agreement in place that the team that scores must polish off a tall boy between all five players on the asphalt rink before the faceoff. (Somewhere in Cleveland Sam N is smiling.) With Greenwald rumored to be in net for the mighty Bows there is a good chance that the collective Biters squad will be hammered midway through the second half.
Prediction: the BTSH gods approve of this debauchery and bless both teams with an absurd amount of puck (ball) luck with the Biters winning 12-9. Neither team’s representatives finish the All-Star Game.
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