Archive for the ‘Weekly Updates’ Category

2018: Week 7 Box Scores – Scoring Highlights

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2018

On Sunday I learned how to open the courts. Anyone ever done that real time before? Need a manual for all those different board(er)s in and around the courts.

Spoiler: Hopefully everyone had the over in every game but Filthier-FK.

 

Sky Fighters 1 @ Butchers 3

Sky Fighters – Jake T (1)

Goalie Loss – James S (1-5-1)

Butchers – SUPER Dave (1), Arthur R (3), Brady C (3)

Goalie Win – Tim Brk (2-4)

Game Notes: This game was closer than the score suggested as both teams traded coolly placed snips in the first period, with Sky not being able to make the most of a few grade A chances in the late stages of a 1 goal game and the crease was victim to another disallowed goal.

Quick Shifts: Butchers definitely David Leggio’d on two different occasions. Watch out for that, stripes.

 

 

Gut Rot 1 @ Poutine 5

TheBitzez – Akhil Nation (3)

Goalie Loss – Eitan via #RosterHim

Poutine – Andy P (1), Brian S (2), Jo-Ann “The” Pro x2 (2), Mike “Pelt Board” (1)

Goalie Win – RJ F (3-1, GAA of a Rouge)

Game Notes: Jo-Ann scored a BTSH hat trick; a goal (or two), a disallowed goal, and a (few dozen) beer(s) at the bar. That’s probably much sleeker than the would-have-been hat trick.

Quick Shifts: T-minus 5 minutes after going live until I get corrections on the above. Can’t beat the consistency!

 

 

 

Rainbows 0 @ Pucks 4

Goalie Loss – Greenwald (0-4)

WTP – Bardown Bandit (2), Paully P (5), Captain Emily! M (1), Justin M (1)

Goalie Win – Eitan via #DidntPlayAgainstHimThisTime

Game Notes: Eitan enjoyed playing for WTP for a change in the first half. Not sure if the second half counted though, he said he didn’t get a shot on goal for that part of the game.

Quick Shifts: When going from Corsi to Fenwick, Rainbows’ relative scoring chances got a bump up from 5 to 25 percent. Arguably the most underrated team in blocking shots. I guess they get a lot of practice at it though.

Greenwald’s new mask screams Dark Rainbows of BTSH – nice upgrade from the not regulation baseball cat eye mask and that human grease fire smelling USA decal scrub mask he sported for a week or two

 

 

Pounds 4 @ Rehabs 1

Pounds – Karsten (9), ScottyK x3 (9)

Goalie Win – Longwell via Ligue 1 free transfer market

Rehabs – HICKSY (1)

Goalie Loss – Eric R (2-1, GAA of a Deuce)

Game Notes: Los Blancos brought a goalie without a real mask to a two-piece stick fight and it caught Rehabs by surprise coming off two straight bye weeks.

Quick Shifts: Era adjusted, Karsten’s 9 would count for 29 back in the pre BTSH, I mean, NHL, lockout era of 2004-05, or whenever he started in the league. They still aren’t very pretty, and low on style points, though.

 

 

 

Instant Karnage 0 @ Cobra Kai 7

Goalie Loss – Steve F (2-2)

Cobra Kai – Not top shelf Tommy L x 2 (6), Liam M x2 (4), Pete G (1), JJ (2), Siena “Foligno” (2)

Goalie Shutout Win – Campbell W-W-W-W-W-W (6-0, 2 shutouts, but not 3, .83 GAA)

Game Notes: Taking one on the chin for him in one of the several of skirmishes in this heated blowout, Will lets the girls of CK fight his battles for him, and the Dojo win 7-0 to go 7-0 on the season. Needless to say, this game was not as clean as Campbell’s save percentage on the day. Lol. Will, do I have your [team’s] goals right today?

Quick Shifts: The God of Thunder is still without his hammer and I’ll wait a week or two to update you all on the Bezos/Musk memes.

But who is the Loki of BTSH?

 

 

Quick Maths (0 plus 1 is…) 1 @ Fish Market’s Bait and Hook 7

Math – James “Bobberhead” W (1)

Goalie Loss – David L-L-L-L (0-4, GAA of ouch!)

Hookers – Noelle “13 clicks (km’s) is a light stroll” x2 (2), TJ (1), CJ “I won Peyton his second super bowl” Anderson x2 (4), Justin #NotMyPrime Minister Trudeaun’t (1), Tiff H (2)

Goalie Win – Tim B via there’s like 5 Tim B’s in this league who did this game sheet and thought this was okay?

Game Notes: Very competitive game. I mean, the game started zero-zero, am I right?

Quick Shifts: Tiff has gone back to GM duties for the Hookers and made the smart move of rather than poaching division 4 players (my texts from Cro have fallen significantly in the past week…) she brought in a new class of Dartmouth talent.

 

 

Filthier 2 @ Fresh Kills 1

Filthier – James (4), Sunny (5)

Goalie Win – Tim “Just another Sunday” K (5-2, GAA of 1.57 and change)

Fresh Kills – Ariel (4)

Goalie Loss – Barch Pile (3-2)

Game Notes: First star (or at least a participation medal Glnzr HM) goes out to Tim K for pulling out a more impressive win than against Pounds in Week 2. He was stellar early in this one to give his team a chance to pull out a big dub (in what I presume was) late in this contest.

 

 

Fuzz 7 @ Anklebiters 6

Fuzz – Jeff x2 (6), Ryan H (2), Mike Teyt (6), Ryann “RNV” G (6), Rob W (1), “Hall” Gil (2)

Goalie Win – Coach (6-1, 2.57 GAA)

‘Biters – Jared P x3 (6), Alex D (4), Carrie R (3), Jason B (1)

Goalie Loss – “DJ” Bubble Baths (3-1, GAA of could have used a second rinse, lather, repeat with the rubber ducky on Sunday morning)

Game Notes: This game was back and forth. There was so many goals being scored I just picked up my stuff and left so I could get a head start on recording box scores knowing it was going to be a long Monday (….aaand Tuesday).

Quick Shifts: Coach’s SV+% is probably now halved after Sunday’s game. In the fleeting moments of the game’s final seconds, video review would have shown the ball being struck at waist height, but with no time remaining on the clock. NO GOAL!

After review, the puck (ball?) was struck in under the cross bar, kind of around the waist….but when we finally looked at my wrist watch…there was…some…no…NO TIME ON THE CLOCK. NO GOAL!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

Mega Touch 2 @ Riots 1

Mega – Liz Boylan (???) via Riots clearly know no one in the league, Michelle P (1)

Goalie Win – Jeff H (not sure if he’s an FA, but he’s got a solid GAA!)

Riots – Kevin “Zed” (1)

Goalie Loss – Dave GdR (0-4-1)

Game Notes: This was such a great matchup on paper, that the referee assigned to the card had to be replaced by R3T!R3DT!M3

Quick Shifts: This was Liz’s first goal since being moved back to defense for Los Blancos, except it won’t show up on the stats sheet, so it’s really not. Sorry Liz!

 

 

Gremlins 3 @ Demons 2

Gremmies – Erich “just another day at the office” G x2 (10), Cody “Don’t forget about me” C (3)

Goalie Win – Jamie “Comments are the best comments” B (4-2-1, GAA of Two point Blue-Forty-Two).

Demons – Brian M (3), Zach “Lawrence Taylor” (2)

Goalie Loss – Charlie O’D via Zog Rule 5 draft

Game Notes: With all these one goal games for the Gremlins, I feel like I know who Marcella recruited for the Women’s scrimmages drills…if Rockoff is going to want to get his client a max contract 2019, he might want to get him off a team running the 1-3-1 in the “land unmarked for hand passes” zone.

Don’t you dare score! Don’t make me remind you about our goal differential rule (just kidding, I already am!)

 

 

Week 7 in Tweets

Phew, gold star if you made it this far this week. I’m going to need another shot of P-I-N-O-T PINOT GRIGIO when I’m in Vegas watching game 7 (what do you mean VGK didn’t have home ice for the WCF and that that is the wrong series entirely?!) #Doubleclick

2018: Week 6 Box Scores – Scoring Highlights

Wednesday, May 9th, 2018

I showed up at 5:28pm EST for my game on Sunday so game notes will be limited. And these are being posted already a day later than normal after the Capitals second round win hangover. Talk about lack of accountability. At least I could string together a three-peat (of on time box scores). Enjoy!

 

Riots 1 @ Los Blancos 7

Riots: Alex L (1)

Goalie Loss: Dave GdR (0-3-1, GAA of “Don’t ask” but Sam Rosen could put a better spin on it)

Pounds: Jake C (2), Sasha “Don’t steal the ball from me Avery” x2 (2), ScottyK (6), Rachel K (1), Karsten x2 (8)

Goalie But Not a Shutout Win: Mike Sizzer Z (5-1, 2 SO, 1.17 GAA, 5-on-5 SV% probably .500)

Game Notes: I believe we need an Avery rule. Get it?!? And congrats/a thank you to the Riots for picking up a late rouge and not allowing Sizzler to send me a reminder email, text, and DM slide that he’s leading the league in shutouts.

Quick Shifts: Klion breaks her 18+ month long BTSH scoring drought by what I presume was a thin mints styled finish from in close and centimetres** away from another foot in the crease disallowed goal. I also trust that there was a shot gun or two (but not three, four, five, not six) to commemorate.

 

 

GANK 5 @ IK nil

Gouging Anklebiters: Sarah M (1), Jason B x2 (3), Probert (Not quite Double Digits I mean 9), Carrie R (2)

Goalie Win: Longwell via Ligue 1 Free Transfer Market

Goalie Loss: Steve F (2-1, 1 SO, 2.00 GAA)

Game Notes: Probert’s social committee was supposed to run #SixoDeMayo but it was more like #Five-O-De-Mayo on the scoresheet. (I originally penned this for my game but got lazy and copy and pasted it here instead). Carrie’s name totally looked like Corey (Winters) on the gamesheet and I almost had a heart attack.

Even after the Pens loss, Phil the Thrill is still a world champion and taking down the God of Thunder

Quick Shifts: Instant Karnage are expected to hold steady with zero points the rest of the season now that they’ve reached/eclipsed their Expected Pythagorean Theorem point total.

Better hope for their sake it’s another photo of Elon. But post PayPal. Wait? What do you mean PayPal runs Venmo! ..Next time we split a bill at Royale, just e-transfer me in CAD plz.

 

 

Devils 2 @ Fuzz! 6

Demons: Miles S (3), Zach “Fine” (3)

Goalie Loss: Zach L (1-4)

Fuzz: “Hall” Gil (1), Mike “Teyter” x2 (5), Ryann “RNV” G x2 (5), Miles (8)

Goalie Win: Coach (5-1, 2.00 GAA, 175% SV%+)

Game Notes: Other people do remember their disallowed goals, not just me. But I need to stay on Alexa’s good side so I won’t provide more details on who had a disallowed goal in this game. Ryann’s goals certainly counted though. Also, Gil stole Ryann’s hattie by shooting the first goal off a Demon and not her. That’s worse than what Avery did by a mile. Zach L “had a nice f’ing paddle save” early in this one to keep it a one goal game.

Quick Shifts: Can I get betting odds on Fuzz! sending Glnzr to the minors but him still getting an ASG spot? Uh oh, I linked an article with the word “hero” in the title, here we go…

the Zuff! Nation stands tall in the eyes of adversity…when it comes to all-star ballot box stuffing

 

 

SKY 4 @ Gremlins 5 (F/OT)

Sky Fighters: Mia (2), James McQ (4), Matt (4), Joe (4)

Goalie OT Loss: James S (1-4-1)

Gremlins: Erich x4 (8), Maire L (1)

Goalie Win: Jamie B (3-2-1, 2.50 GAA)

Game Notes: Erich capitalized on that extra 2% of OZS plays from a week prior and scored the game winner in OT for his fourth of the game. Not sure what Magic Man’s agent thinks of all the non-regulation time wins. We know Walker is ecstatic for extra “black-top” time though. Moving on!

 

 

Filthier 8 @ Gut Rot 1

Filthier: Sunny (4), Greg K x4 (5), Jaime D x3 (3)

Goalie Win: Tim K (4-2, 1.67 GAA)

Gut Rot: Akhil Nation (2)

Goalie Loss: Ed P (0-4, GAA of I thought this was the Gut Rot of 2017, not 2016)

Game Notes: I’m still waiting for Ed P’s “GUT ROT, BITCHES!” comment on our recent poll in the fb group. The team name in full fits quite well there. He did however, request the “Stop, he’s already dead” Simpsons GIF. Luckily he didn’t say where exactly to put it! Okay, he did say “in the game notes”…oops!

Quick Shifts: Filthier used a timeout in the second half…just because they needed to map out how Greg and Jaime were completing their hat-tricks – or the Quad-trick in Greg’s case.

 

 

Rainbows 1 @ Butchers 7

Rainbows: Brian L (1)

Goalie Loss: Greenwald (0-3)

Butchers: Mike M x2 (2), Brady x2 (2), Tarzan (4), Pete D’A (2)

Goalie Win: Tim Brk (1-4)

Game Notes: …time for another photo! Couldn’t find one with Tarzan and his Sombrero from Royale…or the bill that was paid.

I forgot Tia can’t take a photo of her own game. I don’t think anyone will notice it’s from Rose Charity or that Pete is clearly wearing a shirt with the More Tooth logo on it.

 

 

Poutine @ Hookers – N/A “rained out”

Game Notes: I’d make a joke about Jo-Ann finding a reason for her Quebecors to strike due to overcast and also to the Hookers for finding excuses for not playing until their new uniforms arrive but I won’t do that because I got an extra hour for my mid afternoon Sunday nap by not having to referee this game!

Quick Shifts: Welch had to remind me there was no stick checking in our 5:30 game because I stole the ball from him, I mean, didn’t referee the 4:30 game with him and forgot the rules. I think that’s enough filler aka narcissistic comments about myself the box score writer, so we can move back to the games which were actually played…!

 

 

Math 0 @ The Dojo 2

Goalie Loss: David L-L-L (0-3)

Cobra Kai: JJ Murph (1), Luke W (1)

Goalie Shutout Win: Kevin “It’s no big deal I’ll pick up two shutouts today as an FA” Longwell

Game Notes: JJ scores finn-hole** for the game winner on a not-so-high stick windup from a ball in on the side. I guess the repercussions for BTSH “penalties” sometimes can be punitive enough when it results in a GWG (or when you call a holding the two sticks penalty late in a free day “Walkar” tournament…)!

**To my knowledge there aren’t any Finnish goalies in the league so I’ll use that reference up right here and now…! Here goes: Liang kind of plays like Mika Kipprusoff. No wonder Math are still in D-2 after losing all that all-star talent over the years!

Quick Shifts: Speaking of which, it’s about that time of year again. We should get a #SamNorrisfortheASG campaign going.

 

 

Rehabs 5 @ WTP zippp

Rehabs: Cherie S. x2 (5), JoeyBats x3 (7)

Goalie Shutout Win: Eitan L via #RosterHim

Goalie Loss: Scott H (1-4)

Game Notes: JoeyBats went deep three times before the 7th inning stretch and Cherie picked up the GWG early as Rehabs -as advertised- got this one over with in a hurry. Pucks are still waiting on their $130K in beer – no, margaritas! #SixodeMayo

Quick Shifts: WTP wasn’t shutout last year for the entirety of the season (and shut out opponents 6 times) but now find themselves in a hole early this year, having already been shutout twice through six weeks of action, with Eitan #RosterHim improving to 2-2 with a 2.50 GAA against DaPucks after facing them 4 out of the last 5 weeks!

I call this one “Tendy Tilly” featuring Eau da Puck round 4.

 

 

Fresh Kills 6 @ Mega Touch 2

Fresh Kills: Dave S x2 (4), Nick S x2 (5), Gabe the Babe (4)

Goalie Win: Patrick Bar…Tab (3-1, GAA of 3.25 but still in the single digits, amazingly)

Mega Touch: Alex EM (2), Joe L (1)

Goalie Loss: Mike T (2-4)

Game Notes: I don’t have anything to say about this game so here’s a photo of Julie smiling before (but certainly not after) the game. Just Kidding, we’ll add one from the game!

They’ll just think this is something nice and rosy from the Rainbows loss, who is even reading this far down?

Quick Shifts: A certain Toronto native was as non-existent as Demar Derozan against @LeBrian23 in this one with a 10% relative Corsi rating (and a flagrant 2 PIM’s) and I was told Gabe the Babe broke a sweat.

If you don’t get this movie reference then ugh.

 

Week SixO-de-Mayo in Tweets

For maximum chances of salt, give it a #DoubleClick.

2018: Week 5 Box Scores – Scoring Highlights

Tuesday, May 1st, 2018

So now that we know the head of the media isn’t reviewing these articles before they go to print for goalie shutouts and that Walker isn’t checking up on the points/50, PDO, oZS% & dZS%, 5-on-5 ToI, and plus-minus numbers of other league vets and missing out on the Thursday night scrimmage bits, how low will you go?

 

Now in Town Scoreboard (from Week 3)

Poutine 0 @ Cobra Kai 2

Goalie Loss: RJ (2-1)

Cobra Kai: Tom L x2 (4)

Goalie Shutout Win: Campbell W-W-W-W (4-0)

Game Notes: AJ played goalie for the second half of the game but the goalie of record was RJ from the first half. AJ was adamant we give RJ the L. Still following? No? Good.

Quick Shifts: I think we need to enlist the help of Rick and Morty to pull us into the dimension where Riots and Rainbows finished their game. Anywho. Back to Week 5…

They are off to find a world where no one leaves the Rainbows (or Math)

 

Week 5 Results

Cobra Kai 2 @ Gremlins 1

Cobra Kai: Siena “Foligno” F (1), Liam M (2)

Goalie Win: Campbell W-W-W-W-W (5-0)

Gremlins: Erich G (4)

Goalie Loss: Jamie B (2-2-1)

Game Notes: There were no penalties in this Southeast, I mean, “Katz” Division matchup, so I have no snarky reporting for this game. Except for the fact that video review would have overturned the GWG. Wait no, that’s CBC HNIC/Rogers Sportsnet instructing Toronto how to hold video reviews for Penguins/Capitals games…

Quick Shifts: Gremlins ran 78% of their offensive zone starts through Erich but could not strike and open the flood gates with any scoring chances from the home plate. We’ll estimate Tom’s SPSV to be roughly 165% now that the Dojo’s Week 3 contest with Poutine wrapped up.

 

 

Rehabs 3 @ Filthier 2

Rehabs: Cherie x2 (3), Monique (1)

Goalie Win: Eric R (2-0)

Filthier: Sean M (2), James P (3)

Goalie Loss: Tim K (3-2)

Game Notes: With Filthier still on the trade market for another full and part timer for the 2018 top six (4? 10?) in their lineup, Ann was elated to have Sean of Bills Mafia join the team for another game and another goal! ….But would R3T!R3DT!M3 have let him score? Wait, I believe that’s FR33AG3NT!M3 now.

 

 

Poutine 2 @ Karma 1 (F/OT)

Poutine: Mike P (1), Kevin M (1)

Goalie Win: AJ (2-0)

Karma: Cory V (3)

Goalie Loss: Charlie O’D (via Free Agents)

Game Notes: After dropping their Week 3 contest at noon, Poutine make a big push to deny Karma of picking up all ten points available through 5 weeks with an impressive OT win. AJ also got the win. Not RJ.

Quick Shifts: Note to self, confirm all Poutine stats before posting. Writing names down on game sheets correctly is hard. If only we had scorekeepers to help our refs out!

 

 

Hookers 2 @ Fresh Kills 3 (OT/SO)

Hookers: Danilo (3), Sarah (2)

Goalie Loss: Dustin (1-3)

Fresh Kills: Sokol (2), Nick S (3)

Shootout Winner: Gabe

Goalie Win: Longwell (via Ligue 1 free transfer market)

Game Notes: Similar to last year, Hookers only claim to fame in the early going of the season is a one goal loss to Fresh Kills (this time via a Shootout L), as long lost but not yet forgotten Rainbows poachee Longwell denies his former team of the extra point in this one. A pre post pubescent Glnzr was heard reminding Gabe that Sarah was open on multiple offensive zone sequences, but it was to no avail as she managed to score her second of the season later in this contest.

Quick Shifts: Can someone let us know if Ariel did his move (in the shootout)? Thanks in advance.

 

 

Gut Rot 2 @ Mega 3

Gut Rot: Scott K x2 (5)

Goalie Loss: Ed P (0-3)

Mega: Alok (3), Jon H (1), Jeff B (2)

Goalie Win: Mike T (2-3)

Game Notes: It’s Scott K. Not ScottyK as I’ve now been told. Mega win but somehow relinquished their divisional lead (which they held for four consecutive weeks) by the end of the day.

 

 

Anklebiters 5 @ Math 2

Anklebiters: Joe P (4), Mike “Too Kool for Skool but-for the Old Skool” R (1), Alex D (3), Carrie (1), Ben P (8)

Goalie Win: Craig LaC (3-0)

Math: Zach N (1), Adam L (2)

Goalie Loss: David L-L (0-2)

Game Notes: GANK shrug off the zero from last week and spread the ball around well with 5 different goal scorers to keep their lead over Fuzz and pick up an important “4 point game” win in this Southeast division, I mean, CMB divisional matchup.

 

  

Fuzz 4 @ Sky Fighters 1

Fuzz: Mike T x2 (3), Jeff x2 (4)

Goalie Win: Coach (4-1)

Sky Fighters: Matt R (3)

Goalie Loss: James S (1-4)

Game Notes: The Sky Fighters captain said all the Fuzz goals looked great through the video footage they captured on their phone.

 

  

DaPucks 4 @ Riots 1

WTP: Ryan x2 (2), Susie (2), Paul P (4)

Goalie Win: Charlie O’D (via Free Agents)

Riots: Christina R (2)

Goalie Loss: Eitan (via Free Agents)

Game Notes: Eitan lost the rubber game decision, and is now 1-2 vs WTP over the past 4 weeks of BTSH action. Susie cashed in for another goal, this time her first career GWG. Dude’s birthday sash ripped on his first shift but he made up for it with a few great sets for the Nuclears at the Mercury Lounge later that night.

Quick Shifts: Marisa is entranced watching some sneaker-gate viral video and is still late for the team huddle which took place at half time.

 

 

Rainbows 0 @ Demons 3

Goalie Loss: Greenwald (0-2)

Demons: Brad P (2), David R (1), Jenn P (1)

Goalie Shutout Win: Zach L (3-1)

Game Notes: Greenwald served up a Giguere like gem keeping the Rainbows team close with not one but two ten-bell Jonathan Quick like saves in this contest. His teammates surely agreed with me, as they decided it best he get the game ball, except for the small problem that when they passed it to him all the way down the court with 4 seconds left, he was not to be found, with Jenn being the beneficiary of her first career BTSH marker.

 

 

Butchers 1 @ Pounds 5

Butchers: Tarzan (3)

Goalie Loss: Tim Brk (0-4)

Pounds: Luke x3 (4), Karsten (6), ScottyK (5)

Goalie Win: Mike Sizzler (4-1)

Game Notes: Having his only move accidentally gifted up in this past week’s box scores, Captain AFrey took the day off but it did not matter as Los Blancos serve up another slaughter, ironically at the expense of a depleted Butchers lineup on this day.

 

 

Looking ahead….

Be sure to check your emails from Sunday from our Co-Commissioners. You might have missed a very VIP, RSVP!

 

The honour of your presence

is requested

at the wedding of

Hockey 

Beach

Ocean City, Maryland

August 25 & 26, 2018

Black tie optional

Enjoy:

HockeyBeach SaveTheDate

 

 

Week 5 in Tweets

Black ties optional, handlebar mustaches, are not. #DoubleClick

2018: Week 4 Box Scores – Scoring Highlights

Tuesday, April 24th, 2018

There was some great weather on Sunday that followed up an eventful Rose Charity tournament. We hope to see some more great days at Tompkins in the weeks to come!

And thank you to Ariel for being connected with everyone in BTSH on LinkedIn. Without it, these box scores would not have been possible…

 

Chief Design Officer Amy vs NY Real Estate Market Guru Georgine
Gouging Anklebiters 0 @ Butchers 3

Goalie Loss: Tim Bwn (1-1)

Butchers: Pete D’ (1), Tarzan (2), Arthur (1)

Goalie Shutout Win: Peter “Parker” B via Free Agents

Game Notes: “Peter Parker” finally pitched the shutout he was promising many weeks ago for a Thursday scrimmage and the GANK are no longer undefeated.

Way to prove me wrong Pete! Go Jets Go!

 

 

Medical Physicist of Mount Sinai JoAnn vs Senior Project Manager Laura
Poutine Machine 3 @ Tompkins Square Riots 0

Poutine: Jerome (1), Patrick (2), Mike M (3)

Goalie Shutout Win: RJ (2-0)

Goalie Loss: Dave GDR (0-3)

Game Notes: Jerome aka Hornswoggle aka JVR scored in his return to the lineup and Poutine stay undefeated but-for finishing their Week 3 matchup next Sunday.

 

 

Media Campaign Manager Emily vs Portfolio Managin’ LJ
What the Puck 1 @ Cobra Kai 3

WTP: Ball Hogg (1)

Goalie Loss: Scott H (1-3)

Cobra Kai: Olivier (1), Will G (2), Paul B (3)

Goalie Win: Campbell (3-0)

Game Notes: Campbell was going for his best Patrick “Roy” impersonation on this day (oh come on, no groaning, that’s much funnier than the November 12th 2017 tracker) and dropped one glove side to lose the shutout bid late in this contest. Whichever asshole from WTP broke the shutout with just over a minute left, you totally broke rule #1 with that garbage time goal, yo.

Now that the early CK/WTP match up has come and gone, what did you expect? It’s 2018, get with the new ROY race, everyone!

 

General Counsel Katz vs TV Exec Popack Parms
Mega 0 @ Demons 4

Goalie Loss: Mike T (1-3)

Demons: Miles S (2), Brian M x2 (2), Anshu (1)

Goalie Shutout Win: Dave GDR via TSRiots

Game Notes: Demons hang all the time (less than 60% of the time) at the league bar on Sundays, but they did pick up their first win of the season. Hats off to Mike T of Mega for keeping the score line closer than the corsi/fenwick balance of play suggested (which of course, are unofficial stats this year).

 

 

Senior Commercial Ad Producin’ Sheena vs Poor Performance Scrutinizer, HR Directin’ Alexa
Fresh Kills 3 @ Fuzz 2

Fresh Kills: Jeff S (1), Joe S (1), Ariel (3)

Goalie Win: Barch (2-1)

Fuzz: Miles H (7), Mike Teyt (1)

Goalie Loss: Coach (3-1)

Game Notes: Did Hicks really leave as an FA or was he scrutinized for scoring too many goals with his feet in the paint? And yes, before you ask, Ariel used his move on his goal. Expect anything different?

 

 

ROY Nominee (wait you can take pride in that? < 3) Token Sens Fan Marcella vs Head of Marketing Googler Tia
Gremlins 3 @ Dark Rainbows 2 (OT/SO)

Gremlins: Mark M (1), Tim F (1)

Goalie Win: Jamie (2-1-1)

SO Winner: Rockoff the Player Agent (on behalf of his client, Tim F)

Rainbows: Tia L (1), Matt F (1)

Goalie Loss: Eitan via #RosterHim

Game Notes: Tia chipped in with a big HON Candidate (It’s a TSN thing for you American folk) worthy goal to ensure a point for the Rainbows.

Quick Shifts: Gremlins still won so no harm no foul, but I’m sure the league office will work with the head of officiating to iron out video review usage going forward. I’m all for a challenge flag.

Corrections: We posted a record of 1-2 for Jamie B in Week 3, which was incorrect, as he has one regulation loss and one overtime loss.

 

 

Co-Commish Bionic Woman Herr vs Senior Code Producing Sena (Neither drew into the lineup)
Math 1 @ Rehabs 2 (OT/SO)

Math: Adam L (1)

Goalie Loss: Eitan via an active two way contract on the waiver wire

Rehabs: Alex W M (4)

Goalie Win: Showtime (2-1)

SO Winner: JoeyBats

Game Notes: Eitan helped Math get another point as the Norris clan continue to go with the hot hand. #CrowdedCrease #RosterHim. This game was close the entire way (because it was tied after regulation, OT, and the first three shootout rounds, duh) which saw LJ (via Cobra Kai) open the shootout with a forehand snipe. The video has been sent around to her own team, USA Ball Hockey, and Pavel Barber for extended scouting/viewing purposes (you might have seen it on the BTSH fb group by now). After being asked to go full Brian Rolston prior to the attempt, Cherie clinched a sudden death shootout frame by opting for a quick but coolly taken snapper glove side. JoeyBats iced the game with a quick backhand forehand move to finish upstairs blocker-side. No video reviewers were harmed in determining that Joey did not enter the crease on this game winner.

 

 

Master Colourist** Lisa vs Advisory Managin’ Stat Shotgunnin’ Schmorgg
Instant Karma 6 @ Gut Rot 2

Karma: Big Ben 6’9″ C (1), Matt S (2), Briana V (3), Bill M (1), Derek Z x2 (3)

Goalie Win: Charlie via Free Agents

Gut Rot: Ramon (1), Peaches (1)

Goalie Loss: Ed P (0-2)

Game Notes: Board of Director Morgen asked me to track a plethora of stats this season, but since I was refereeing I have no idea what happened in this game. I’ll just presume Ramon’s goal was with a high follow through and move on to our 5:30 games. (That’s as much thought as any future Instant Karma opponent wants to think about for a matchup against this undefeated squad that no one saw coming)

And note that they have almost eclipsed their Pythagorean point preview value

 

 

Ali Maespace The Educator vs Product Developing & Global Brand Managing Caroline
Pounds 6 @ Sky Fighters 0

Pounds: Karsten x 3 (5), The Real Scotty K (4), Nick (1), Michael (1)

Goalie Shutout Win: Mike Sizzler Z (3-1; 2nd SO)

Goalies Loss: James S (1-3)

Game Notes: Now that we are 1 full month into the season, they are no longer the “New Look” Sky Fighters, but they were looking like the Sky Fighters of Week 1 again, as Karsten scored 3 garbage goals (note: not garbage time goals) with Roberts chipping in with his first of the season to help pace Los Blancos to a comfortable late Sunday afternoon win. I hear they really liked their first few weeks of the schedule, particularly all the late start times. Makes for good hangs at the league bar though!

Quick Shifts: Frey wanted the return of Econ Memes and now that I’ve delivered, it’s his turn to get his name on the score sheet. Look out for a coast to coast rush to the forehand side of the court finished off by a shot glove high on the far side over the next couple of weeks.

 

 

Hockey U-S-Eh! MD Tiff Hagge vs “my Trading Floor is better than yours” Managing Director Ann
Corlears Hookers 0 @ Filthier 3

Goalie Loss: Dustin (1-2)

Filthier: Sean M (1), JJ (1), Ann (1)

Goalie Shutout Win: Tim K (3-1)

Game Notes: I think Hookers had a full lineup but lost. Not sure what the excuse is this time. Maybe someone should get their goalie bigger pads. (There is a set around back with the old nets and crates, *eyeroll*).

Two minutes in the Sin Bin: Sam and James were seen complimenting each other on their physiques early on in this one.

Quick shifts: Will buffalo boy Sean strand his mates from the Gremlins in Division 3 to play for Filthier full time? Ann certainly hopes so as she also got back on the scoreboard with her first of the year, but more importantly, Filthier got back in the win column.

 

 

Week 4 in Tweets

These totally peaked at week 2. Don’t give it a #DoubleClick

2018: Week 2 Box Scores – Scoring Highlights

Tuesday, April 10th, 2018

Keep on checking them stats pages!

As Mr Becker pointed out, the Katz division was 3-2 against the Soko division on Sunday. HoLEE GuacamoLEE! Upset central.

However, Fourth Division Beat Down Day was in full swing, as all Michaliga division teams fell to their CMB opponents on Sunday.

On to the games that were..

 

Rainbows 1 @ Hookers 8

Rainbows: Sean R. (1)

Goalie Loss: Jess D (0-1)

Hookers: Cro x2 (3), Danilo x2 (2), Tiff H (1), Sarah (1), Lee (1), CJ (2)

Goalie Win: Dustin O (1-0)

Game Notes: Hookers played with an eligible goalie this week. Good work team! Also, we have like, a whole bag of “NEW” goalie gear behind the old nets in our little fenced in outdoor storage area. Thank you to Cherie for coordinating that and Sam for bringing that from Feasterville. Be sure to put it to use! Great gear. (more…)