Week 6 Preview: Part II
May 13th, 2014So its my birthday weekend and instead of you giving a gift to me, I am going to give a gift to you, the BTSH Universe. Elly is going to write a preview on how he thinks I am perceiving this matchup, and I will do the same for him.
Suddenly after switching brains with me, Elly remembers every game in BTSH history from the start of the Modern Era (2008), and all of his shirts magically turned lime green.
5 Thoughts, by Elly:
1) Why doesn’t Richie ever talk about Brad or Langer in our previews?
2) I know why, its because I’m better than both of them. I scored two goals last week, none of those two jerks scored any.
3) Why is my grammar really terrible all of a sudden?
4) Hey…why won’t those guys in the background let me sit with them?
5) My life sucks, I wish I was Rich Glanzer.
5 Thoughts, by Richie
Rich is hoping to play some Skeetball at Ace on Sunday to celebrate both his birthday and a Mathematics win!
2) This weekend is also my birthday weekend. Shaun deLacy has not wished me a ‘Happy birthday!’ yet. Neither has Gil’s son. Or Gil’s son’s dad. Don’t they know it’s my birthday weekend this weekend? They’re all getting benched to start the game. I will start instead…
3) Any girl on our team who scores a goal against Math on Sunday gets a dollar. If Derk or Elly are on the court when the goal is scored, I’ll add another dollar. That’s fair…
4) However, if I give you a dollar, you have to play me in Skeetball at Ace Bar after the game. And I will win. Because I never lose to a girl in Skeetball. Or arm wrestling…
5) Derk, Elly, that’s not what I sound like. I sound like this. Derk, Elly…”
[Derek’s Note: There’s no way Richie wrote that, because I’m pretty sure he’s never spelled “deLacy” correctly in his life.]
I Love You Not….Previews Week 6
May 12th, 2014Love. It’s why we’re all here. From the time we are a baby, snuggled into our Daddy’s arms, to when we are leaving this earth, as our great grandchild clasps our hand one last time, we are looking for one thing.
Love.
A 2009 photo of Ben Chadwick and I after we beat the Demons in overtime.
But as we find out…true love doesn’t last forever, and often times, the ones we love are the ones we leave.
I don’t know these two people. I actually just used a Google image search.
But perhaps they would be happier if they didn’t have some creeper taking a picture of them while they were in bed?
Which brings us to…
Happy Mother’s Day! (Fears)
May 10th, 2014No games today due to Mothers Day Fears. Outside of your family dog, there is no one in this woruld who loves you more than your mother.
Baby Talia has two loving parents. And don’t worry BT, by the time you are old enough to play in BTSH, Poutine and Filthy will merge and become one powerful superteam.
That will still lose to the Hookers in the playoffs. Dammit. Maybe Eitel or Soko will adopt you.
Squirrel
May 8th, 2014Today is Filler Friday. We asked you…the BTSH Universe what you wanted to see. And only one person responded…Adela…who wanted to see me in a shirt with sleeves. But I really wanted to put up this cool picture of my new friend Squirrel. So I’m going to do both.
When I was taking the picture of Meanie Greenie, I noticed this squirrel hanging out with food in its mouth.
He too could beat Rebecca Norris at arm wrestling.
Week 5, Not 3 Stars
May 7th, 2014We can’t all be winners at life, and remember, with every winner, comes a loser. We at The Authority feel its better to let someone lose with dignity and grace, then rub it in. Except when it comes to these three.
Obligatory Simpson’s character picture so Hopper and Chadwick read.
