2019: Week 1 Box Scores – Scoring Highlights
April 4th, 2019Et le but!
No, that is not a reference to Sam “’ack a dart” Norris having made a return to the btsh sideline to referee – but in reference to having our first Sunday of sneaker hockey at Tompkins in, well like barely 3 months, okay maybe 4. With that, here were the goal (le but) scorers (and goalies of record) from this past Dimanche.
Poutine 5 @ WTP 3
Poutine – Mike Pags, K-Mac, James McQ, Mike Marr, Brian Sulli
Goalie Win – RJ F
DaPucks – The Butler, The Dude, The K-Man
Goalie Loss – Ed the P stands for #myPoachee2019 (No GAA, sad face)
Game Notes: Someone told me that Henry was expecting a Box Score shout out for scoring the league’s first goal of the season – luckily for him I’m in mid-season form and 5 other btsh posts already beat me to it, so no, I’m not saucing over that shout out. I will however say that the #notMyRoy2019 race is off to a hot start! You really expected me to say something different?
AdvncdAnlytcs: After his side drew level at halftime and midway through the 2nd half, Poutine’s Mikey-M huffed and puffed and blew the ball far side on a nice one timer to win the game late, and then, as a referee definitely not named Greenwald put it, Poutine “ran away with the game” by scoring an empty netter with half a minute left. Wait, the shot count didn’t suggest that at all….
Fuzz 3 @ Filthier 1
Fuzz – Gil’s Son’s Dad, Jeff x2, Alexa
Goalie Win – Tim Bwn
Filthier – Jaime D
Goalie Loss – Tim K
Game Notes: Fuzz used their championship banner to mend the north net on the east court before the game started, so (un)fortunately Sunday’s east court action could not be delayed by another trophy presentation, because that meant neither a trophy nor banner could be used for said spectacle. Thank god. If you are looking to point fingers, the netting “banner” you can blame on me, Rich.
Karma 0 @ Gremlins 1
Goalie Loss – Steve F
Gremlins – A Rockoff
Goalie Shutout Win – Jamie B
Game Notes: A battle of dependable predecessor and successor ends with the former prevailing in a low scoring goalie duel. Or it was just the conditions, who really knows, just look at the next game’s score.
Gut Rot 0 @ Demons 7
Goalie Loss – Charlie O’D via EitanNotGoalieing4u
Demons – Neil Zed x4, Miles S x2, Sara K,
Game Notes: I guess those people who stayed on Gut Rot are enjoying themselves thus far.
AdvncdAnlytcs: After starting last season 0-and-insert big number here, Zach Lewis gets 2019 started with a W and a shutout. Oh, and Neil had a natural hat-trick to pace Demons with a 3-0 lead, which included a late marker in the first half which wasn’t really a turning point in the game but still cool.
Pounds 4 @ Cobra Kai 2
Pounds – A Frey, Ajay, Karsten x2
Goalie Win – Mike Z
CK – Eff Gill Ween, Pete G
Goalie Loss – G#2 Not Campbell (we’re awaiting our beat reporter to confirm…er, wait, is it a beat report if they lose?)
Game Notes: Top Shelf Tommy broke his scoring drought by going top bunk on a deflection…into his own net. It was a goal which unfortunately turned the tide in the game as Cobra Kai’s 2 goal lead from early in the game evaporated quite quickly thereafter, unlike the water on the courts.
AdvncdAnlytcs: CK’s new goalie was quoted as being “too ice” like by the Pounds sideline. Logical statement. Real hockey don’t work here. That’s why Roberts never scores any goals, except when he plays against WTP.
Butchers 0 @ Hookers 1 (F/SO)
Goalie Shutout Shootout Loss – Max via FA
Goalie Shutout Shootout Win – Dustin
Shootout Winner – Danilo
Game Notes: Is this a sign of things to come for the 2nd division, close low scoring contests and a narrow division race through opening day to the final weeks of the season?
Biters 4 @ Math 1
GANK – Proboooort, Jared, Chris x2
Goalie Win – Craig La-“DJBB”
Math – Justin “Caps are still champs” P
Goalie Loss – David L
Game Notes: Alas, it was not to be for 2D; this game was not as close as the other divisional matchup on this day.
Mega 2 @ Rainbows 3 (F/SO)
Mega – Bill L, Joe L (I’m sensing a theme with all these L’s here)
Goalie Shootout Loss – Mike T-man
Dank Bows – Matt F, Yetter
Goalie Shootout Win – Greenwald
Shootout Winner – Rem
Game Notes: Clearly Rem’s Return wasn’t factored into that preview!
AdvncdAnlytcs: Greenwald has said that he will not be retiring, even though there is video evidence of a North American champion burning him in the shootout. Give that guy a participation trophy for toughing it out!
Wait, Shortis won the North American championships? Where are the banner and championship jackets at?

Rehabs @ FK – PPD #SunFears
Sky @ Riots – PPD #SunFears
Week 2 Previews – Part 1
April 4th, 2019Dank Rainbows at Mathematics
Rem’s return to the Rainbows from a one year hiatus provided the boost they needed to get over the Mega hump. It may not have earned them the Schlitz, but revenge is a dish best served with a side of ‘hey, how’s my Rainbow taste?’

Herr’s ringers had a difficult time acclimating to our asphalt pond last week, but hey, conditions weren’t exactly ideal for the transition. This Sunday’s forecast is looking promising and so is their matchup. We like the chances of them having an opportunity to display their talents.
Prediction: Cat adores Math’s ‘blonde’ jerseys and is caught gazing as Jon and Dave easily get the Mathematicians their first W of the season, 5-1.
Read the rest of this entry »Three Stars of Week 1 (Opening Day 2019)
April 3rd, 2019by Cat

It’s been so long. How are you doing? I hope you had a wonderful winter. Did you play ice? Did you detox from vodka sodas and budweiser? Did you finally wash your Mylec gloves? Just tell me everything you were up to!
I say this from the heart: I did not really miss you guys that much. Maybe Rich. Did you hear I’m a Mets fan now? So we have a lot in common these days. A lot changes in five months!
The first Sunday back went off more like a whimper than a bang – rain delayed games, a few of the later matches decided to reschedule, the sun came out like the coy bitch she is at 5pm. Some dedicated types went to East Village Tavern but the cold and wet prevented a quality afternoon court hang. No court hang = no good goss for me to turn into an arrestingly funny three stars.
Third Star
The Boo’ers

Ok the only good goss I heard is that Probie scored within 5 minutes against Math and everyone booed.
Love it. I’m obsessed.
Read the rest of this entry »2019 Rose Charities Street Hockey Tournament
April 2nd, 2019Drumroll please . . . The Greatest Day of the Year is almost here! The annual Rose Charities Street Hockey Tournament will be held on Saturday, April 27th and registration is officially open. Game day registration is also available and begins at 9 am, but in this digital age ain’t nobody got time for lines.

Around The League (Week 1)
March 31st, 2019By Arya Stark
Fuzz held their banner raising (the rare banner raising that takes place with no trophy present), then proceeded to outlast Filthier 3-1 in a tight contest. Gil had the awesome no-look pass on the game winner while Jeff stole an empty netter from his wife and will probably be introduced to the business end of the sofa bed this week.
Poutine toughed out a surprisingly high scoring match against their new division rivals What The Puck and won 5-3, keeping numerous survivor pools afloat. James wins the award for most wipeouts on the day, playing as if it wasn’t constantly raining during his game.
The upset of the day was probably four teams cancelling but the Demons actually playing their game, which they took handily 7-0 over Gut Rot. Hey, dropping divisions three straight years certainly has its benefits.
The Gremlins outlasted Karma with a tight 1-0 victory. Walker celebrated the season opening victory by ordering 27 tacos and correcting the grammar on the menu.
After falling behind 2-0 early, the LBS rallied with four straight goals to beat Cobra Kai 4-2. I guess those Soko Division Preview writers knew what they were talking about.
The Hookers beat the Butchers 1-0 on a shootout goal from Danilo. Somewhere out there the lines for D2 props are shifting rapidly.
The Biters beat Math 4-1. Probie had at least one goal while Andy finally sent me a Christmas card last week.
The Rainbows outlasted Mega Touch in an 8 round shootout. Julie popped the water bottle with her backhander but it wasn’t enough as the Rainbows have already exceeded 2017’s win total. Afterwards Brett suggested that in the future shootouts where teams are about to repeat shooters, there should be one round of goalie-on-goalie attempts. BTSH, let’s make this happen.
While you may be expecting more game writeups here, all the 5:00 teams cancelled their games despite the fact that the weather was way better at 5 than any other point in the day. Sad times but Soko’s got kids and the Rehabs ladies were probably borderline dead today from a full weekend of celebrating Sena’s birthday. Special shoutout to the Riots who pulled the impressive move of cancelling a late game when they were the closing team and not sending a rep to help, you know, close. I guess that’s one way to maintain an undefeated record…
We’ll leave you with the full shootout from two teams who actually wanted to play hockey today. See ya next week.

