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Facing Backwards on 2016 is a short series by the media team in which we reflect on the season and what it meant to us.  We hope you enjoy.  Here’s the final installment.  (Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3)

Thank You

Facing Backwards

by Diana ‘Cheekbones’ M.

Facing backwards is a common practice not only in BTSH theme writing, but also in my daily life. For instance, I enjoy facing backwards on elevators, much to the discomfort of my fellow riders. When you don’t break eye-contact, and keep on mouthing “hello” repeatedly, you can really make yourself unforgettable.

I also face backwards when the doctor’s office only has the afternoon appointment available, and I have to weigh in post lunch and a latte. Oh and I don’t have to take off my shoes? I’m a size 9 boot, plus the weight of the knife. I won’t look at the number that comes up.  It ain’t right.

I face backwards when riding around in Sam’s car too, because trying to pry the trunk open from the inside is only going to be successful in one direction.

And sometimes I face backwards on Monday mornings. Not only because the mirror is showing me E.T. when he puts the wig on, but because of all the hilarity of the BTSH Sunday. I don’t know what the hell I used to do on Sundays, but it wasn’t this good. Here are the top ten things I see when facing backwards on this season:

10. Tommy and Amy realizing they accidentally landed on the “dirty” version of Summer Lovin’ at the Karaoke Contest

9. Joining the media and getting to see how much love and effort that crew puts into the league, even French Rich.

8. Newman organizing a scrimmage, having an overflow of participants, and not being able to get rid of his perma-grin.

7. Dana’s role in the photo shoot for You’ve Got Male . She committed early and hard.

6. Amy’s contributions to the same piece, especially “Ophelia: what’s the secret to getting married? Amy: Never let him see you poop”

5. Two team trips to Hillsdale, organized by the Donohue’s….one where the entire team fit into a hot tub, and every female refused to sit next to Joe P.

4. Peeing in Coco’s bathroom during a team gathering, seeing the door open, and Craig put Jojo down inside, and then shut the door.

Here’s Jojo!

3. Derek and Eli’s rendition of “I Want it That Way”

2. Teaching Chuck how to shoot

1. All the Anklebiters

The team that dranks together wins together.

Facing Backwards on 2016 is a short series by the media team in which we reflect on the season and what it meant to us.  We hope you enjoy.  Here’s Part 3.  (Part 1 and Part 2.)

BTSH
by D. Perko

If there is one thing BTSH stands for its dedication. Dedication to the sport, to the league, our teams, and each other. There is a certain uniqueness to every thing about this league, it’s so pervasive is almost unbelievable that at some point we were drinking beers in our parents’ basements in some far off town (or Staten Island).

Man and stick happily reunited.

BTSH is pure. Yes, some people or teams (looking at you fart rainbows) may embody the competitive spirit a bit too much, but it’s simply because this league means so much to so many people. Witnessing such passion only begets more enthusiasm for the sport, work, and life in general. Walking into work Monday morning knowing you’re a winner (only experienced it once but it was fucking awesome) make you feel inconceivable.

BTSH is a collective acceptance that we didn’t give up. At the end of every Sunday, beers in brown bags, we silently acknowledge this tried and true tradition of sport. Some may not know others, some perhaps a bit too much, but that will never take away from the fact your never a stranger in BTSH.

BTSH is engaging. Witnessing the unadulterated passion in captains’ meetings and the absolute shit show Facebook page is truly a delight. Moreover, a big shout out to everyone who organizes this league, without you we’d all be face down in our own filth (fart rainbows all the time).

BTSH is you, dear reader. You come out to play every Sunday, no matter the hangover, heat, or homeless human’s turds on the court. You are BTSH.

From the bottom of my heart, I cannot thank you enough for this amazing opportunity to be a member of this league and wish all teams the best of luck next year, because GUT ROT is coming for you!

The league has been put on notice. Perko and Gut Rot are coming for you in 2017!

That Ol’ Time BTSH
by Isaac

After spending a season and a half listening to stories about the ‘good old days’ from league veterans, myself and fellow newbies were finally treated to a couple of those vintage times.

The Parkside Lounge gave us a safe space to celebrate and wallow in our own self-disgustingness that was labeled under the working title of the BTSH Olympics. It featured everything from competitive drinking, boys stripping, hooligans gambling and even two girls sharing a cup.  The incident exceeded expectations and it’s going to take a couple of years for some of us to recover from it.

Sunday Funday

Crabfest brought our community together in what felt like a Sunday family dinner or reunion at a very BTSH place.  The massive crab table and nearby booths were packed with folks popping open crabs, tearing off limbs, cracking jokes and demonstrating their method for scoring that Maryland deliciousness.  Up and down the main bar area it was a mish-mash of BTSHers sloshing back pints and freely carrying on about who knows what.  And the ACE bartender and staff welcomed and served us without a moan or a grumble.  It felt right being back at a place that actually wanted us to be there.

Taking part in these affairs makes it an honor to be associated with such deviant miscreants as y’all.  The rookie class of ‘19 has some mighty big shoes to fill.

Dear Diary
by Sam

Tuesday, July 19th, 2016
Dear mother f*cking Diary!
This summer has been great–ever since not having to be a full-time BTSH journalist, I have been splashing bars and have my life back.  The biggest hunk of them all is now the editor-in-chief, and my common law wife down the street has also been writing the previews, too.  I don’t know who Ophelia Baulls is, but damn, I really want to meet her.  She may even be a better fit for me than Diana Marko, but at times they’re like the same person to me.  What a great f*cking year it has been so far.  The only way it could get better is if the Fuzz lose and Juerys Familia blows the Mets’ post season for the second straight year because I’ve been preaching about how terrible he is and nobody except Zach listens…

Fire Marshall Sam

Facing Backwards on 2016 is a short series by the media team in which we reflect on the season and what it meant to us.  We hope you enjoy.  Here’s Part 2.  (Part 1 can be found here.)

Dear Diary
by Sam

Wednesday, August 12th, 2015
Dear Diana Diary,
It’s 11:00 pm on Wednesday right now, my day job was hectic today, and I am stuck in my bedroom writing previews… for the 4th straight week.  Last week, I can’t believe I only got 7 likes for that 3 hours of work, and 4 of those likes were from former media writers and John Walker.  That’s incrementally only 1 like per hour.  I hope this week’s games don’t get rained out because the joke about Rich actually being well-endowed would please an audience.

Thursday, September 17th, 2015
Dear Diary,
Last year, I would have been out drinking or at a Mets game right now, but this year, I’m home scraping BTSHers’ Facebook pages at 11:35 pm on a prime drinking night, so that this league can have a few laughs with this week’s previews.  I have ran out of all material.  All I can come up with are Rich Glanzer jokes, and everyone knows that’s complete fodder.  I wonder what Diana Marko is up to right now; I am going to try and get her in the media next year so I can hit on her.  Yes, that is a good plan.  But, Rich will also hit on her.  Is he better looking than me?  I know Derek is the best looking Norris, so I am glad he left the media, but this Rich fellow can’t be trusted, and she might be a fan of man arms, which I clearly don’t have…

Sexy and he knows it.

My Lovely Fuzz
by Richiehero

In 2004 I was playing poker and my friend Farrell had on a 2003 Yankees American League Championship hat. It struck me as odd because they lost the World Series, so why would he celebrate that season?

There was a time last season, when I thought it was over for me. I knew I didn’t want to bring back the Elves, and I knew my (lack of) talent wouldn’t make many teams pick me up. But then a funny thing happened. Hicks messaged me saying he wanted to join us, despite the fact that we only had two wins. Jeff messaged me and said he was interested. Coach texted me and wanted to join. A tall girl from Buffalo named Alyssa saw Caroline walking with her stick and inquired about the league. Alexa convinced Jeff that he would love playing with me and Fuzz was born. At this time last year, I couldn’t wait for 2016 to start.

French Rich and the ladies of Fuzz.

And I was not disappointed. Yeah, Fuzz won a ton of games. But I swear to you that isn’t why I loved this season. Unlike the previous 4-5 years with the Elves, we actually went to the bar. A lot. We went to Ocean City and were one of the most social team there, as we didn’t play with ourselves (dammit!), we all joined different teams. We had a team laser tag event, and not surprisingly, Sean DuhLasie won.

On a personal note, nothing makes me happier than Alexa being very jealous at Jeff and my friendship. I taught Hicks how to backcheck, and his mom friended and defriended me on Facebook all on the same night. (Her reasoning was something like, “F*cking Jew”)  I’m Alyssa’s legal guardian, and yeah, Steve is literally the ugliest Ice Girl in NHL history. And if you want to talk about improvements…we used to get long winded filibusters from Chadwick that none of us understood. But now Coach sends us a 14-word email that none of us understand. Way better. (No offense Ben, I still love you)

So what does this season mean to me? That I was fucking wrong about Farrell and his 2003 Yankees hat. Yeah, this season didn’t end the way I wanted it to. And to be honest, with so many great teams, a lot of very good teams, some pretty good teams and Instant Karma, I’m not sure it will ever end the way I want it to. But I can’t wait to look forward to see if it will. Because looking back, 2016 wasn’t my favorite ending, but it was my favorite beginning, middle and fuck you Rehabs. Congrats, you totally deserve it. Drink it in man…because Fuzz is a comin’…even if we didn’t get there.

Journey > Destination…but Destination matters.

Facing Backwards on 2016 is a short series by the media team in which we reflect on the season and what it meant to us.  We hope you enjoy.  Here’s Part 1.

Freedom Isn’t Free (But Free Agents Are)
by JW

So, when I asked Isaac how I could help out with the Facing Backwards piece for the website he suggested that I write a piece about new free agents added to the league this year, to show how cool new people get added when captains use the free agent list. I of course knew right away why he picked me for this portion of the article – because myself and some others went on a (umm….crusade?) this season to get people to use the free agent list, rather than borrowing players from other teams. Without further ado, let’s meet the new free-agent-turned-full-timers:

I’ll pick a team at random to start with, hmm, I dunno, let’s say………. The Gremlins.

The Gremlins
by JW

The Gremlins added 3 new people this season (it just occurred to me, that is certainly a team record for us). Since I love all 3 of them equally, I will profile them in chronological order of when they were added:

Cody C.

Marist Hockey baby! Big ups to Poughkeepsie, NY.

Continuing in the long tradition of cool and skilled BTSHers from The Sunshine State (Rox – this kid is a Lightning fan!) Cody was the first person we added, at the beginning of the season. He made his impact felt right away – he scored in his first game, and assisted me in that same game. Additionally, right away he fit in with the Gremlins ethos, and with almost the same immediacy……he broke his ankle and was out for the whole middle of the season. Sigh. However, he returned toward the end of the season and it was like he never missed a beat.

Alex R.

Go Sabres!!

My fellow upstate NY brethren. A couple of us met Alex at the preseason free agent scrimmage but unfortunately we didn’t have space for him right away. About a third of the way through the season we realized we had a spot, we contacted him and he was ready to go. I believe Alex scored in his first game as a Gremlin also, and he also fit right in with us right away, but his most triumphant moment came when he got stung by a bee during a game and kept playing, with the stinger in his arm the whole time. (This is hardcore, for BTSH, people.) In addition to being the most hardcore person in BTSH history, he is also a super cool and laid-back guy, and a skilled hockey player.

Marcella C.

So Canadian. So, SO Canadian.

This gal puts the “cool” in Coulson (wait, is that how you pronounce her last name? Crap, it is probably pronounced like “Moulson”, isn’t it? That really backfired.). I reached out to Marcella via the free agent list and she jumped right in, it was like she was born to be a Gremlin, and born to be a super fun new part of the league. She is also THE most Canadian of any Canadian in the league, as far as I can tell. I will leave what that means up to your interpretation.

Skilled, supportive, and fun, she is the type of teammate any team would welcome.

Wait, I am fairly sure she ALSO scored in her first game as a Gremlin?? Is it possible that I am the best talent scout in league history??

Well, one thing is for sure: With these 3, I am definitely the best coolness scout ever.

Cobra Kai
by Seb

Rachel I.

Rachel has been a great addition, always up for hanging out afterwards and team bonding. She runs her own fashion blog and is an awesome person. She even scored her first goal late in the year to wrap up her rookie season!

(Editor’s note: I can attest to Rachel’s awesomeness, AND I was playing in net for Kai and witnessed her score that goal!)

Dark Rainbows
by Abby

Dan S.

Not knowing how BTSH works (Let’s be honest, who does?), Dan showed up to the one of the last scrimmages of 2015 instead of the Open/Free Agent scrimmage of 2016. Suspecting (correctly) that we may lose a guy or two in the off-season, Tia Lendo “Calrissian” got his contact info and endorsed him solidly. He started with the Dark Rainbows this year and has been a fantastic addition to the team bringing strong defensive play, a positive outlook and sunny disposition, and lots of team spirit. Instantly dedicated to the Rainbows, he also brought on Emily Gregg — another excellent addition — mid-way through the season!

Mega Touch
by JW

Alex E. M.

He looks like such a good guy…….until you get to know him.

Mega used the free agent list to bring on this guy midway through the 2016 season, and he has been a disaster ever since. Consistently rude, crude and breaking Rule #1 whenever he gets the chance, I am surprised this fella even made it through half a season without being tossed out of the league. He NEVER agrees to ref, he does nothing for the league, and all he cares about is winning, winning, WINNING. Mega has a long, proud history of being one of the coolest teams in the league and this jerk has all but ruined that in 9 weeks. Let this be a cautionary tale to us all: The free agent list doesn’t ALWAYS yield cool new players.