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by Arya Stark

Week one of the survivor pool is in the books and we’ve already got our first elimination as Brady learned the hard way one of the first rules of gambling; bet with your head, not your heart.  And while Mr Caldwell, by all accounts, has a heart of gold, it wasn’t enough to overcome the Riots who took down Mega Touch 2-1 this past week.  Tough break for Brady who will have to go back to his preferred pastime of destroying Glanzer birthdays via savage Facebook comments.

Three people took Cobra Kai and after an early scare when Gut Rot took a 1-0 lead despite rampant inebriation by basically every female on their team (apparently they spent the morning crushing liquor on Rockaway Beach with random strangers before appearing on the courts with literally 20 seconds to spare).  Sadly for this band of ruffians and for the eight other entries hoping for the upset, they were unable to hold off the Cobra Kai who showed no mercy en route to an eventual 4-2 victory.  Also showing no mercy were the Hookers with an 8-0 win over the Rainbows and the Rehabs in pulling out a close 2-0 victory over the Demons.  Jen was so distraught by this loss that she drank herself into a stupor until 12:30 AM; had they won, she would have left the bar by 12:15.

Week 2 of the Survivor Pool will take place this week culminating with the July 16 games.  All Survivors, please submit your picks to BTSHPool@gmail.com by Sunday at 1:00.

by Arya Stark

Calling all hockey fans, BTSH vets and degenerate gamblers alike:

The First Annual BTSH Survivor Pool will commence on July 9 with the week 11 games.  Standard survivor pool rules apply – each week, participants are invited to select one winner for any game taking place that Sunday.  Any participant who chooses a team that loses their match (regulation, OT or shootout) will be eliminated from the pool.  All surviving members move on to the next round but are unable to reuse teams.  Each week, survivors will continue picking teams (each person using a different team each week) until only one person remains.

Fine Print & Contingencies: If all survivors are eliminated in one particular week, none will be eliminated and the following week will commence as if all teams won.  Any games that are postponed or called off by the league for any reason will result in both teams being credited with a “win” for that week.  These teams will be ineligible to be picked again.  If 5 or more participants remain in week 15 participants will begin picking two teams per week, one primary and one secondary pick.  Anyone who picks both winners moves onto the next round.  If no one picks both winners, the primary picks that were correct move on.  If no primary picks are correct, secondary picks will be considered.  If multiple participants remain through the end of the regular season contest will extend through the play-in round of the playoffs.  If no winner is crowned by the end of the play-in round then all remaining entries will split the prize pool.

Entry fee is $5 and can be paid via cold hard cash. Anyone who is interested, email BTSHPool@gmail.com with your picks for July 9 or with any outstanding questions.

Ed. Note: this pool is not affiliated with previous pools run by the media.  From the ashes of those hot mess rises something bigger and better.