btsh.org

by Cat

Years of resentment have been temporarily soothed by an adorable deepfake of Hero playing catch, so this week I’ve buried the beef with Rich and can talk about other people for once.

But as BTSH media’s beef beat journalist, I’m not really sure where to turn to next…

First thoughts: Fresh Kills vs. The League. Recently called out for their lack of social participation, someone with the single most French-Canadian sounding name I’ve ever seen took to Facebook. To my knowledge still nobody has partied with them* (send tips to: mediabtsh@gmail.com) but it DID stir up old grudges from that one time they left Gut Rot with the bar tab.

Also we’re all just petty they’re smoking us on the court.

*Editor’s note: Russ did in fact, party with them. TBD if they paid their tab.

Second thoughts: Matt Kastella vs. The League. During his first performance I thought to myself, New York is back, baby! I missed Tompkins and its quirks! Life is a rich tapestry! Wow who knew someone could sing a worse Justin Timberlake impression than me drunk at Karaoke! Free Britney! At this point I am surprised that a West Court goalie stuck listening to him 10 feet away hasn’t jumped the fence.

*Editor’s note: Hicks is holding Russo and I captive in a Matt Kastella Fan Club instagram group chat. Send help.

I think my final beef might be with Canadians-not-googling-visa-stuff-before-traveling-outside-the-country? Just as my beloved Bows finally got Matt back after his trip to Italy resulted in a mandated stint in Canada, I received word that Stu from the Anklebiters (and my upcoming Ocean City team – GO CHEEKS) will be out. Ya’ll. Why.

Anyway, on to the stars:

THIRD STAR

The founding captain of What the Puck – Old Captain Larry! – returned after seven years away from BTSH and promptly scored against Cobra Kai in the first few seconds. 

Unfortunately the dojo regained their footing quickly and came back to win, but still – the guy knows how to make an entrance. 

In spite of this loss, WTP has been really impressive this season – exciting to see how the next few weeks pan out now that their pairings are really ramping up.

SECOND STAR

I’m gonna call it prematurely perhaps but – I think the Demons are on the up-and-up. OK beating the Rainbows at 12:30pm aka the game slot everyone is still hungover for might not be the biggest win of the season, but it was the least spicy game against the Demons I’ve ever played in. Tracy’s positive influence is spreading, they’ve got a new guy with impressive wheels and booty shorts, Sammy created so many chances from deep in the corner… maybe this is the momentum they need against the Skyfighters next week?

I lost the thread a bit but in summary:

This is sort of a generalized star for the Demons for re-branding from rain fears to, uh, sun cheers.

FIRST STAR

This week was a bit of a snooze in terms of star-worthy activities (see: giving the Demons a star) so I texted Isaac because I was like, why hasn’t Steve emailed me about Karma. It turns out that was because Karma had a bye week and Steve was in Tulsa.

So first star goes to the commissioners for creating bye weeks so that I was the happy recipient of these photos which I will now share:

*Editor’s note: Friedman you asked for this. Not literally but—no pun intended—karmically speaking.

by christo_the_hawk

In a game where both teams were hurting for female players, Poutine beat the Sky Fighters 5-2.

Today I learned that the shorter the shorts, the better the hockey player as evidenced by the hot pants wearing man who notched 2 for The Demons in their 4-1* defeat of the Rainbows.

*Zach F stole an open net goal from his own teammate—rude!

After a quick first goal from WTP, Cobra Kai came out on top against WTP winning 4-1. And Liam didn’t score at hat trick. (Or attend.)

Shockingly, Fresh Kills didn’t give up a ton of goals against The Butchers despite having their typical scoring deficit. 6-1 FK. Also for those not on facebook the 5 newbies on Fresh Kills invited everyone to come drink with them but abruptly got shit on. Don’t worry you guys we’ll be nice soon it’s just your initiation.

Gremlins got their mojo back and swept Rotten Math 4-0. Walker wants everyone to know he was +2.

Mega Touch unsurprisingly beat The Riots 5-1.

Ankle Biters and Lbs took it to OT, then shootouts, where Sarah M started it all off for the Biters and they cruised to a big fat W.

Rehabs beat Filthy 2-0. Credit to Hicks for being the Tompkins Park singer’s #1 fan.

Great day of hockey and see you all next weekend!

By E-Rex

As this is my first time writing anything for BTSH, I understandably am a bit nervous.  I can’t remember if I was bored at work or drinking when I volunteered to write previews on a Facebook post (maybe both?!)  To keep with the theme of this year, I consulted Spotify for a list of one hit wonders from the last 20-30 years.

Poutine Machine @ Skyfighters

OMC – How Bizarre (Official Music Video)

“They didn’t lose anyone last year?”

“They’re 6-1, on a six game winning streak?!”

“They’re tied for the 3rd best record and leading their division?!!”

Yes, the Skyfighters have arrived and they’re not going away.

Sir Mix-A-Lot – Baby Got Back (Official Music Video)

Baby got back(check).  SBJ might be gone, but that still leaves Poutine’s other young guns who can run 100M only a hair slower than Usain Bolt and still have the energy to score goals and then celebrate by funneling beers on the sidelines while waiting for their next shift.

There’s a storied history between these two teams in recent years, with Poutine having the upper hand.  Will this game change that?  I’m trying to remain independent, so I consulted everyone’s favorite subway psychic, Keano, for a prediction.  Poutine will win in an overtime thriller, 3-2.

Dark Rainbows @ Denim Demons

Chumbawamba – Tubthumping (Official Video)

I imagine that the night before games, the Demons sit around a table, pound their fists on the table, do some weird chant and then all drink whiskey, vodka, lager and cider in quick succession.  This might explain the number of wins they have?

Bobby McFerrin – Don’t Worry Be Happy (Official Music Video)

Is there a nicer team than the Rainbows?  They always seem so happy.  A couple weeks ago, they lost to Fresh Kills and they were ecstatic that they put up four goals in the game.  

As history has shown us, good often doesn’t prevail. The Demons are going to squeak out a victory 2-1.

What the Puck @ Cobra Kai

Rockwell – Somebody’s Watching Me (Official Music Video)

Cobra Kai with their goalie tandem of Casca and Campbell started off hot, 6-0.  Since then, they’ve dropped two games and Fresh Kills is right below them in the standings.

Sonique – It Feels So Good (Official Video)

Has any team been more inspiring the last couple years than WTP?  Through solid play and more poaching than The Smith does during weekend brunch, Hogg has turned a fourth division team into a solid second division title contender. 

WTP is still reeling after losing to the biters and comes hungry.  They extend Cobra Kai’s lose streak to 3.  3-2.

Butchers @ Fresh Kills

Daniel Powter – Bad Day (Official Music Video) | Warner Vault

The Butchers lost Cheeky to the Hookers right as the season started (probably some other players too, but what team hasn’t) and have only won two games this year.  I’m sure they’re wishing the skateboarders staged some sort of protest, forcing this season to be cancelled.

EMF – Unbelievable (Official Music Video) HD

Just like Corporate America, the Fresh Kills had a booth at the Colby career fair, where they recruited heavily.  They started off a little slow, but have been on a tear since and are poised to go deep in the playoffs.

FK 6, Butchers 1

Rotten Math @ Gremlins

Everything But The Girl – Missing (Official Music Video)

The Gremlins were in last season’s final four and this year, they’re 1-6.  Most teams have lost a couple players due to the pandemic, but Jamie, Erich and their other ringers are nowhere in sight this year.

Haddaway – What Is Love [Official]

I personally like math, so I’m not sure why out of all the possible permutations of Gut Rot and Math, they chose Rotten Math.  I’ll chalk it up to love.   

Gremlins magically spawn superstar players overnight and win 3-1.

Mega Touch @ Riots

Hanson – MMMBop (Official Music Video)

Can’t you see Julie bopping on the sidelines to some Hanson? 

Simple Minds – Don’t You (Forget About Me)

The Riots got their first point of the season when they forced the Demons to OT last week.  They have a good core of talent, they just need a consistent goalie and a bit of good luck.

The Riots have been playing better as of late, and this is the week they get their first W. 3-2 in OT

Gouging Anklebiters @ Lbs

Lit – My Own Worst Enemy (Official Music Video)

The Lbs have been ravished by injury and spotty attendance.  They’re fighting to stay in the first division, although their win last week proves they shouldn’t be written off so quickly.  

Baha Men – Who Let The Dogs Out (Official Video)

Rich made me promise to write about Hero.  I despise this song, but Hero is a good boy.

Anyway, after an 0-3 start, Probie’s rebuilt squad is 3-1-1 in their last five games.

This can go either way, but I’m going to put the Lbs on top 4-2.

Rehabs @ Filthier

The Rembrandts- I’ll be there for you (official video)

Understandably, people think of Cherie and the ladies when the Rehabs come up, but with much of past season’s roster gone, their defensive play has allowed them to stay competitive this season.

Skee-Lo – I Wish

Does Filthier wish James and Ann would change their minds and move back?  Or maybe their wish is just to win back to back games and stay in the first division. 

Rehabs 2-1.

By Glnzr & Jss

It’s that time of the season where we finally tell people what we think of them. This will be really interesting because Rich has all the BTSH knowledge in the world and Jess has more grammar and syntax knowledge than Rich could possibly possess. Together, we’ll make one fully competent hockey preview. 

21 Rotten Math

Rich: They aren’t the worst team…how could they be, they have the best shootout player in BTSH history, Elly! But I will die on this hill, this is the worst name in the history of BTSH. And the fact that I’m on a team called Fuzz and I can say this makes it that much worse, Diane!

Jess: Agreed, there were so many better options (Gut Math, Math Rot, Mutt Rot). I thought this combo would be stronger but due to losing some key Gut Rottians (Kellie, Becca, Akhil) and Mathers (…Jack) they need some fresh talent to bounce back.

Rich: I’m not a combo name fan. Just pick a brand new name, have Elly shoot all shootouts, win championship over Fresh Kills, disband, and never speak to one another until ESPN pays you millions for their 30 for 30. 

20 Demons

Rich: Much like the stupid crappy Mets, the Demons won the off-season. They got the two best players in the free agent scrimmages (why did we have 2?). But sadly those big money acquisitions have not added up to W’s.

Jess: Yeah I really thought they’d be a force to be reckoned with this season but have been surprisingly underwhelming. But hats off to them for being a bit more likeable this year, no doubt thanks to the newbies and as always, Tracy <3  

Rich: You overrate Tracy’s likeability. 

Jess: Tracy volunteers her time to mentor high school girls from underserved areas in the 5 boroughs, I hope you feel bad now!!!

19 Riots 

Rich: The Riots have 3 games left and I predict they will win 2 of them. Sadly, one of them is against the Rainbows. Sorry Jess. 

Jess: Respectfully, you’re wrong as hell. The one thing I do agree with you on is that for once the Riots should not be ranked last. They’ve come out hard and had some close games so far this season.

18 Butchers

Jess: The Butchers only have 2 wins so far—against the Riots and the Hookers. Also they got blown out 9-0 by the Lbs (who, imho, aren’t the powerhouse they used to be) in the worst goal deficit of the season.

Rich: Jess! How could you rank the Butchers 18th! Don’t you know they have RG1, Rachel Greene on this team? You have a lot to learn about this league, sweetie. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sim7tCJyC8

Jess: Don’t pin this all on me, this is a joint venture so you get 50% of the blame when everyone is pissed. Also Rachel knows I love her.

17 Gremlins:

Rich: This team made the semis in 2019. They are very classy but I’m struggling to say something nice mostly because Michelle sent me a holiday card and it literally got lost in the mail and now she’s making me be nice to her or I don’t get it. Any advice to me and words of encouragement to our friends over at the Gremmies?

Jess: The Gremlins have had arguably their worst season ever with only 1 win. I hesitate to say their entire winability stems from Erich scoring and Jamie holding it down in net—because they’ve historically been a scrappy team that can get it done together—but they need to find an X factor and fast. 

16 Rainbows

Jess: Alright hear me out I’m not going for blatant favoritism (I literally say we’re gonna lose all the time in previews)* BUT we have really been hanging this year despite our record. We scored 4 goals against FK (that’s got to count for something) and we haven’t really had any blowout losses. I’m also ranking us above the Butchers because we typically beat them when it counts.

Rich: Dude you only put 5 teams ahead of you. You’re fine. But beyond that…I’m beyond impressed with you guys. Losing your best player** a week before the season started could have been a death nail. You guys hung tough. You guys played a really good half vs. Fresh Kills. 

Jess: *you guys know i love you sm and are my favorite people in the league

**debatable

15 Rain Fears

Rich: The only team having a more disappointing season than Rain Fears are the Gremlins, Demons, Lbs. and Mets. Even Rubens played through the rain on Sunday. The only reason I’m ranking them so high is from 2017-2019 the playoffs have been delayed bc of them. 

Jess: It has come to my attention that Rubens did not play on Sunday but instead let his team play without him; so while I previously wrote he gets a pass on all demons x rain fears jokes next season, I rescind my offer.

14 Hookers

Rich: Cheeky has been lovely to Hero, so I’d rather focus on the positives. They always buy Bud Light after their games and I usually steal one without Newnam noticing. Sorta how none of them noticed when I sneaked past their D and scored on a breakaway! USA!! USA!!
Jess: Yes and if we focus on only the positives they’ve won 2 games!!! It’s evident in their record that this season is particularly tough due to new male talent getting dispersed to pretty much every other team besides The Hookers—they’re very lucky with the additions of Cheeky and Morgan.

13 Filthier

Rich: In 2015 the Mets made the World Series, Sheamus was WWE Champion and Filthier sat atop of the BTSH Universe. Much has changed since those times. Sadlier, the Mets, Sheamus and Filthier are no longer contenders for the top spot. I should note, I’m not really sad about Sheamus or Filthier. Good team but they need elite talent.

Jess: They have the goalkeeping talent that’s helping them hang tough but if they don’t add 2-4 new superstar players next year they’re going to def drop a division.

12 Anklebiters

Rich: I debated long and hard who should go higher Filthier or Anklebiters. Then I realized I should walk Hero he prob has to pee really badly. 

Hero: Pee more, write about Anklebiters less, Daddy. 

Jess: After seeing the Biters come back against WTP last week I think they deserve to be at 12. They’ve had a rough season but can clearly still hang. This is a next season problem but they need some newer young players because even golden boy Ben is getting old (no offense, pls still invite me to your wedding).

11- Bye Week

Rich: Is this like the NFL where when teams come off the Bye Week they have a crazy winning record? If so, watch out, you losers from Cobra Kai. 

Jess: Yeah, you Cobra Kai losers!!!!

10 Sky Fighters

Jess: I admittedly rolled my eyes at their cockiness in the beginning of the season but unlike most teams they’ve really put their money where their mouth is and have been on a winning streak. It’s going to be a tight race for who gets out of d4— Sky Fighters or Mega and if I’m being honest I would like it to be SF. They’re the team that historically is the ‘farm system’ of the league and I think it’s about time they get taken a little more seriously and retain some talent. Let’s see if their confidence holds steady with Poutine, Demons, and Fresh Kills as their final opponents of the regular season.

Rich: I have an infinity for the Sky Fighters franchise. They won the 2009 BTSH Championship by upsetting heavily favored WTP. Things have gone south since then, but with Dan Hopper back, Jake being steady on D they’ve really improved. Emily is an elite Hero watcher btw. 

9 Poutine

Jess: Before anyone comes for me, yes, I know, they only have 1 loss but it’s tough to rank them higher when they almost lost to Rotten Math. SBJ being gone is definitely a hit to their scoring prowess but they have so many other girls and guys who can get it done. 

Rich: That’s what Poutine does. They almost lose and almost beat everyone. In their whole existence they haven’t had a game decided by 3 or more goals. I’m sure that’s not actually true. The point is, they play up or down to their comp. They can win the title. I don’t think they will, but they def can.

8  What the Puck

Jess: Normally I would rank them higher but their schedule thus far has not been very difficult. Sure they beat Filthy 2-0 and Lbs 4-3 (again, not that impressive, they aren’t as good as they used to be) but I would like to see how they do with their remaining games against arguably tougher teams (Biters, Cobra Kai, Rehabs, Hookers).

Rich: Is this the team Annie actually plays for? Has she ever scored for them or just you guys and the Lbs. in a shootout? If it seems I’m a little salty for her ruining Fuzz chance at a perfect season, well let’s just say outside of Cat, there is no one I’m more salty of in this league. 

Jess: Damn, how will Annie recover from that first degree burn.

7 Mega Touch

Jess: Rich is going to kill me for saying this but firstly, Courtney and Tash have played multiple entire games all season (YEAH I KNOW, ANDREA AND KELSEY DO IT TOO AND THEY’RE THE BEST ALSO). Anyways after that shout out to my ladies, this year’s Mega is tough competition. They’ve hung in every game and even their loss to Poutine was getting too close for comfort according to Sully. I don’t think they should be underestimated.

Rich: Girls playing entire games happen all the time in BTSH. It’s not at all unique and I never understood why we celebrate this. I would think the opposite should be celebrated. Six women showing up every game because it would show team spirit/commitment. That said, Julie, do you have Courtney/Tash’s emails? I want to ask them something. #PoachingSeasonStartsEarly

6 Rehabs

Jess: Rehabs get the 5 spot due to their overall reputation but when you look at their schedule this year they’ve lost to the tougher teams (Fresh Kills, Fuzz) and surprisingly to the Hookers. They’re elite enough to stay in the 1st division (better than Filthier & Lbs) but when it comes to playoffs I don’t see them making it into the semi finals.

Rich: I actually moved them to 6th because Avery and Karsten are back and with Alex’s shady Rain Fears game and a half next week, Luke will make 2 more games in one day. It appears Alex May is not playing for the Habs this year and with the loss of Sena, I think they are still a super dangerous and talented team. Hicks also wants the world to know they are undefeated since he became captain. This guy is almost as bad as Friedman. (See Karma preview)

5 Lbs

Rich: Props to the players that show up week in and week out. Zisser, Kelsey, Alex, Caitlin, new girl Melanie, Joel and Boylan (Boylan almost never shows up but if I don’t include her and she finds out about it there will be hell to pay). But it just feels like the team as a whole are treating this like a weekend Feasterville Tournament. That said, this team can win the PBR Cup. 

Jess: I will kindly state they’re still holding their own thanks to Frey and Kelsey playing multiple full games and fielding decent FA talent. Alex definitely cares, a lot, so disagree on the Feasterville comment but the ‘treat the regular season like nothing and make the 4 game minimum’ motto of many of their players is really annoying. And yet I think they will still make semis.

Rich: Alex (and I) care about weekend Feasterville Tournaments. 

4 Karma

Rich: Jess, you think you want Fuzz to lose, but you don’t. The only people that ever gloats are Miles and Sig, Sig left and Miles doesn’t know anyone. The team you don’t want to win is Karma! Outside of the classy Vernoia siblings and one of the two Tremble sisters, these are all miserable human beings, especially and obviously their goalie. That said, as horrible as they are as humans, they are conversely all very good at hockey, sans Isaac. He’s average. This is a legit title contender. They have 2 superstars in Derek/Austin. Their women are some of the best collectively in the league and as much as I despise Friedman, I’d love to play for him. He’s such a positive goalie. They’ve never made the semis. They are like Baby Hitler. They must be stopped. Hopefully they play Fresh Kills in round of 8. 

Jess: Please don’t hype Austin up like that (it’s too late for Derek). We also can’t forget about Braun. I’m working on telling people when they’re right and I’m wrong even though I hate it so much (hi Scott) and, you’re right. If Friedman sends emails to the media after every regular season game making the case for Karma to get a star, I can’t even begin to imagine the emails I’ll be getting during playoffs or if they win the entire thing. Spare me.

3 Cobra Kai

Jess: It pains me to inflate Russ’ ego like this but credit (not to Russ) where credit is due. The storyline last season was ‘what will become of the dojo without Campbell’ and honestly despite him lying and being back in NYC all the freaking time, Casca is doing great in goal. They’re essentially picking up where they left off and maybe their addition of Yetter will pay off and he’ll finally score a goal where it matters in the back half of this season—or playoffs. 

Rich: They were #2 when we originally wrote this but their loss to the Lbs. made them drop a spot. They went for it with big market signings of Sig, Yetter, Ryann and Casca.(Sadly Fuzz poached back Ryann in a brilliant plan by me and executed by Jeff) They’ve lost in the finals and semis before, so only a championship will suffice. They certainly are one of the teams who can win. Let’s see how they do against Fuzz in 2 weeks. We won’t have any girls, but our boys will be motivated…after Sig texted me telling me he guarantees Cobra Kai doesn’t lose another game this season. 

2 Fresh Kills

Jess: With the Butchers and Sky Fighters as their remaining 2 games it looks like FK is going to cruise to an 8-2 season. Their first game when they lost to Cobra Kai was before they acquired all those Lake Forest ringers and their other loss was to Fuzz. Maybe it’s the crotchety fake old schooler in me but it seems kind of lame to stack a team full of ringers and then just win allllll the time. Where’s the excitement?! At least Gabe and Ariel (and Meg) know how to socialize after the games and that is my biggest qualm with the newbies.

Rich: Man you shit on the Sky Fighters. Don’t worry, they’ll never read anything but their own. I agree, the #24s and Colby Girls should party more. But so should the league. There hasn’t been one league sponsored Super Spreader event. This league needs to find its fun again.
Hockey wise, this is an incredibly talented team. They give up a lot of goals, but I think it’s because they don’t care because they know they will win by 3 (at least) every game.

1 Fuzz

Jess: Let it be known Rich did not place Fuzz at number 1, I did. They had 1 loss in their first game of the season against Lbs in a shootout and have comfortably won every game since. We hate to see it. Someone please knock them out in the playoffs; I don’t think I can stand the gloating if they win 3 years in a row. *princess Leia voice*: Help us Fresh Kills, you’re our only hope.

Rich: Cutler asked me what it would take for me to love Fuzz as much as the Elves. I think it’s happened. We never complain to the refs unless Russ is reffing and there have been zero incidents with our opponents. I hope the destination leads us to the PBR Cup, but either way the journey has been a lot of fun. And Sig, I mean this sincerely. I miss you as a teammate, and you’re losing when we play you on August 22. Believe that. 

by stoop dogg

Three Stars – Week 8? What week is it even? Anyways, I have never written three stars, but don’t worry humans, this won’t include anything about sex toys or mean girls. I, however, still like to be #unique so this will also include Three Not Stars. 

Third Star – Steve Friedman, Instant Karma 

Steve stood on his head in his game against Rotten Math. Made some insane saves and absolutely crushed it. He then proceeded to be a trooper and subbed for the first half of the Riots vs. Demons game where he again made save after save, playing a major role in keeping the Riots in the game in the first half of the game. Additionally, he is getting a star for his truly peak negotiating skills with Math’s captains. Steve put his impressive lawyering to good use to secure his team some extra ladies. Not only did he do it the day prior vs. waiting until he got to the courts, he also offered financial and goal compensation, and he gave a big hug of thanks for putting up with his bargaining. 

Second Star – Nico of the Poutine Machine 

Pull your jaws up off the floor, you read that right, a Poutine player is getting a star. Don’t worry, I already checked, the sky isn’t falling. Poutine had a by-week and despite that, Nico still showed up to the courts and reffed 4 games – HINT, WINK, NUDGE, we still don’t have enough refs, so sign up to ref! Four games of flawless reffing, a pretty thankless job is deserving of some stars, a big mac truck sized thank you, and some free beers from everybody else in the league. 

** Embarrassing picture not available at this time… Instagram friend request is still pending. **

First Star – AliCat 

As all of you have likely noticed, the youths like to spend Saturday nights, hanging out at the Tompkins courts, popping mad wheelies (that’s a skateboard term, right?) then popping mad bottles, and smashing them on the courts so that there are shards of glass all over the place. Which makes it super duper unsafe for us to play. AliCat, despite not being a player in the league, proceeded to sweep it all up, like that absolute boss she is. HINT: would be super cool if players of the league could get there early, help out, and clean up the glass! 

** Absolutely no credit of any kind to Russ as he played no role in AliCat being awesome.

Honorable Mentions

The Demons minus Rubens. A team who usually runs away at the very idea of rain. It seems they have turned a new leaf and not only showed up for their game, they even played through the drizzle and ended up winning. 

Jamie of Rotten Math for scoring her first ever BTSH goal 

Jack aka Tadpole for subbing in net for Lbs and doing a surprisingly very good job. 

Hero & Jack for gracing us with their perfect presence. Special shout to Jack’s excellent coaching skills. He’s very vocal from the bench, and his team is really appreciative of that. Hero is getting a mention, because Glanzer only gave up writing the Stars this week so long as I mentioned Hero. 

Ninetails, Cat’s contingency on letting me write the stars this week. I had to google what this is and what it means. Ninetails is a pokemon character that is categorized as a Fox whose abilities are Flash Fire. It is non-binary and stands at 3’7” and weighs a solid 43.9lbs. I didn’t understand any of the other things that the websites said, but still a very elegant and pretty looking animal.

 

Three Not Stars:

Third Not Star – The Rain 

Rain is almost as pesky a beach as Karma. Rain gave us some serious moments of cancellation fears with a heavy drizzle starting in the first half of the 1:45pm games, however she ultimately held off for the rest of the day and waited to unleash until after the last game ended. For that, we are very thankful, so it is awarded Third Not Star 

Second Not Star – Rubens 

He didn’t play, I assume because he was too frady scared of the rain, however he let his team take the risk and go out there and play instead of just outright trying to cancel the game. For that he gets the Second Not Star. 

First Not Star – The Butthead who stole Lbs player’s purse 

Unfortunately, we had an incident where an unknown individual came through and stole somebody’s bag, which totally sorks big time. Obviously, we are adults and all responsible for our own things, but we all want to have a safe environment to play, drink, and hang with friends, so keep your eyes peeled. If you see somebody lurking who is clearly not part of the league, be cognizant of it and say something so that people can make sure their belongings are safe and sound! #seesomethingsaysomething The d-bag thief gets the First Not a Star! 

Honorable Not a Star Mention: 

Derek Zaentz for calling his girlfriend “Hon” on the courts during play of game. Be better, Derek!